to feel like crying at the sight of the presents under the tree

[MrsKeithRichards]

At the in-laws.

Mil and fil, bil and his wife are away out with our ds to go to the Christmas fair. Dh and I stayin here and picking up the traditional Chinese meal. Fil asked if we could pop the presents from upstairs under the tree for swapping after we eat. There are loads, absolutely tons. I feel like the meanest cheapest arsehole on earth. Our collection of 5 presents look utterly small and miserable in comparison.

They are small and thoughtful but not expensive. They've told up many times not to bother with big presents for them. They know money is tight for us. I was never going to come empty handed.

There's a pile for ds, a few big gifts for us. I'm dreading when they come back and we exchange gifts. I'm not comfortable at all.

They sound nice people op. Cherish them.

(Most) People don't give to receive, they will love your presents so just enjoy Christmas. X

We have an ok salary however I am off on Mat leave and as childcare is so expensive this is probably a permanent situation so we have to be careful with money. My dsis had also just had a baby and had given in her job however her husband earns a huge 6 figure salary (his bonus was more than my while year wage before tax!) We try and buy people thoughtful gifts but don't spend a lot. My dsis puts no thought into it at all and just shoves a gift voucher at me for £50 which she has ordered online but ordered so late that she just prints off the email confirming it which shows she bought it the night before which to be honest means nothing. I know both sets of parents have spent quite a lot on us particularly on our 6 month old ds however they love doing it and all are in an incredibly good financial position so let them enjoy spoiling us (although don't expect it). Please don't feel guilty as you will ruin your Christmas and they will be thinking how lovely your gifts are not the monetary value. My parents tell me not to buy then anything however I am not sure I could turn up empty handed. I have bought them little presents but actually the best thing I hav already given my Dad is a jar of horseradish for £1.87, he (and I) adore really burn your nasal passages horseradish however my Mum only finds really mild ones but I managed to get a good one. He is really looking forward to the beef on Christmas Day now-it really is the little things that count!

you've given them grandchildren and that's the best gift. I already want some and my dcs are still small!

I know exactly how you feel OP. My parents have bought me and dp lots of presents and part of me just feels horribly embarrassed and upset I couldn't do the same. I lost my job a couple of months back and bar a couple of weeks temping have had no luck. So money is right. I'm so grateful for their generosity don't get me wrong. I keep trying to remind myself that my presents ,though few, are thoughtful and they will know that. (I know they will. It's me who has the problem not them)

Please, please don't feel guilty, if your parents are anything like mine they absolutely do not want anything - they have a very comfortable life style with everything they could possibly want/need. They love spending their money on their children and grandchildren and really, really dislike being given anything because it means actively trying to find a place for it or more likely, discreetly giving it away to a charity shop . I have learned my lesson ever since my DGM died and when sorting out her house found boxes and boxes of Christmas and birthday presents that we had given her over the years . Now I give my parents a charity gift, they are happy, the charity is happy and I get the feel good factor .

Op the best gift I have had so far this year is the ability to make sure my very skint best friend was able to have a decent Christmas with her children, all it involved for me was giving her cash so she could enjoy a guilt free shopping trip for presents and Christmas food.

I expect they are like me and just prefer giving and seeing your apply faces will be the best gift for them.

Happy happy happy not apply

Hello from my new kindle fire hd!

My dh got a fancy coffee machine. They were over the moon with their gifts

Thank you all for the reassurance.

Ah that's great! Merry Christmas!