£300 for a sitter to watch ds over night?

[Spuddybean]

DP and i are getting married in beginning Jan. We would like DS to be watched overnight in the hotel so we can have a shag drink.

The hotel room for a sitter costs £130, which is fine. I contacted an agency who have said the sitter charges £9 per hour, also fine. But then the agency have said they charge £50 fee on top, erm not so fine and that we have to pay 'expenses' - and i'm not really sure what that entails. Room service for dinner i suppose, which is fine. But what else? taxis to and from the hotel?

Anyway, this then means it will cost more than £300 Does this seem reasonable?

Are you back at work, OP? If so, do you have a childminder or nursery nurse who could look after him?

i know what you are saying Random, but i wont be able to relax if i have to go back to the baby in the hotel room.

i also bf so wouldn't leave him for a whole weekend with my parents. not to mention my parents very, ahem, 70's approach to child raising and total disregard for our 'middle class, woolly, liberal choices' of not giving ds findus crispy pancakes and rothmans from the age of 3 months old!

There is no way that i would leave my dc with someone she does not know (reistered professional or not) just to have more to drink or stay at the party later. Absolutley not. Where we go dc goes and she has never stayed a night without us (she is 2.5 now). We have been on romantic weekends away to hotels etc and would not have wanted to go without her. We come as a package. Just my opinion and they way we live but i personally don't get why you would pay a professional stranger to look after your baby for you at night. Fair enough when you are workin and they are at nursery having fun but otherwise seems a very odd thing to do. Obviously it is your choice and if that is the kind of thing you do then fine but i would get connecting rooms for sure to pop in and check on them.

Not back at work and we live in MK so even if we did it would be too far away.

I have nct friends in MK who would do it for a night, but we will be in London.

If you are breastfeeding will he not be upset to be left all night with just bottle? I know my dc would not have liked that at all.

babies don't have Rothmans til at least 9 months, surely?

Have your parents not heard of Silk Cut?

He will be sleeping Mama so i doubt he'd even notice. And it is not staying just at any old party a bit later, it is at our own wedding, and being with guests who will have traveled across the country to be there.

He combines bottle and boob Mama. He actually prefers the bottle i think :(

If I can help give me a shout, I am a qualified nanny of 11 years and would do it for quite a lot less! I live in London and drive so could be pretty flexible.

they would have him weaned on to woodbines by 9months Jenai. None of this modern namby pamby low tar or filters!

11 years experience, not 11 years old... that'd be awkward!

god that is an expensive --shag- drink

Right, ask round your friends, see if anyone can recommend a nanny who will look for some weekend work. I would say a 7 - 1am would be better. Most won't then ask for taxis although a meal would be normal.

Are you sure none of your friends would do this for you?

I would do it as a wedding present for a friend as it is the kind of thing that you know will give the couple a lot of pleasure (ahem) and good memories of enjoying their wedding party?

" Fair enough when you are workin and they are at nursery having fun but otherwise seems a very odd thing to do."

God help us when leaving children with a sitter and getting pissed with your husband is 'odd'.

Op, go for it if you can afford it. You'll only marry once (hopefully)...

"Where we go, dc goes"

So you never fancy a play, or a gig, or a night in a bar?!?

i have no friends with kids Dontmind, if it was to 1am we would defo need to pay for taxis as i doubt any sitters live near regents park, or would drive/park in central london, or would walk anywhere at that time of night. For that money we may as well pay for the whole night i think.

Lurker - i don't have many friends (all ditched me 3 years ago when my best friend went off with exH) they few i do have from the nct group are all in MK so couldn't do it.

No one coming is staying in the hotel so would have to take ds home with them. Of Dps friends, we are the only ones with a baby so none would be able to look after him/or want to.

You've had a couple of kind offers on this thread- maybe look into them? I'm sure there is a way round this.

yes BOF i've pm'd them :)

Assuming your DS is bottle fed could you not ask a close friend / relative etc to take him home from the wedding - I'd have preferred my sister / sister in law / friend etc to look after a small baby than a stranger from an agency - or could you not offer for a friend to stay at the hotel with your DS - at least that way just pay for room and not for babysitter too?

nope forever, no one fits that description, sadly.

Consider it as a wedding present to yourselves. I think one of the biggest relationship problems is thinking of yourselves as parents and not a as a couple anymore. It's one night, your special night, baby will be next door, the sitter is qualified and has all the proper checks. Maybe do it for a symbolic promise to yourselves that you will nurture your marriage as well as your children.

aaaw idocrazy, yes i agree :)

Well if no one fits that description (such a shame, I'd do it for any friend or relative (eg have looked after other people's DCs for wedding anniversary weekends away), wouldn't mind not drinking at the wedding - but then I have 3 kids, can see not realistic with friends who don't have childcare experience) then your choices are:

a) pay the £300
b) have him in your room
c) follow up one of the leads here or advertise elsewhere

£9 an hour is normal central London babysitting rate - just a lot to pay all night when asleep!

At my sister's wedding the sitter stayed in the room with dn but left when they went to bed - dn was in my parent's room so dsis and dbil could have their wedding night.