I'm from Ireland but live in England. Parents and sister were due to come over for a Christmas visit on 2nd of January. Mum rang me a couple of weeks ago to tell me Dad isn't coming because he's "still a bit fragile about his health." Last Easter there was another excuse for him not coming, not sure what it was (health wasn't an issue then). WRT to the health thing, basically he had a relatively minor heart problem that has now been completely rectified. He is otherwise well, fit and strong. IMO it's just an excuse.
He will be coming over in March (unless there's some other excuse) as I'm due to have a baby at the end of February.
My father has form for cutting himself off from family and it looks like I'm next on the list. He didn't go to his brother's funeral recently and didn't visit his identical twin brother when he heard he had cancer. I thought being his daughter I would escape this but clearly not.
I feel like just washing my hands of him now because I'm aware from his treatment of other family members that this is only going to get worse - eventually the only time I'll see him is when I go to Ireland (usually once a year) and I feel if he's not willing to make the effort to see me then why should I make an effort to see him.
AIBU to just give up? Or am I overreacting? There is a history here, more with my mum than with him. My family are generally shit, basically. He was an ok father. Not abusive or nasty in any way, just totally detached. I don't feel like I can take any more casual disregard of my feelings. Sigh.