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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think Xmas gifts for kids have just got ridiculous?

126 replies

PoppyPrincess · 15/12/2012 07:51

I asked DSD what Father Christmas was bringing her yesterday, she replied ''a blackberry tablet, it's like an iPad''
She's bloody 7 years old! She's already got a blackberry phone, an iPod touch, a laptop and a leap pad tablet. She never even uses the laptop or the leap pad tablet that she got last year.
Seriously what can she do on this tablet thing that she can't do on her laptop or iPod touch?
Neither my DP or her mum are well off so it's not like they've got the money to indulge the kids with expensive and unnecessary gifts.
When I was 7 I was playing with dolls! The only electrical stuff I was interested in was a cassette player (yes I'm showing my age here!)
I also feel a bit shit for DP as he's got bikes for them and a couple of other toys and I think he's worried that they're going to compare them to their fancy gifts from their mum.
I know it's up to their mum what she decides to buy them but I do worry that she's just spoiling them, possibly to be the more popular parent (but that's a separate issue).
I just think that this culture we have where kids get spoilt and given any gadget they fancy is just getting daft, how are they ever going to appreciate the value of money when they are given whatever they want and not made to save for it?
When I was a kid I knew there was a budget for Xmas and birthday presents, if what I wanted was over that budget then it would have to be a joint present or I'd get money and have to save for it.
Yes I know that not all parents give these expensive gadgets willy nilly and I'm sure there are lots of parents who do make their kids save but it just seems to me that the culture seems to be going more towards giving our children expensive and unnecessary gifts and basically spoiling them.

OP posts:

Sirzy · 15/12/2012 07:55

I think there has always been a wide spectrum of gift giving at chrosmtas from the children who get nothing to those who get everything on their list. The main difference now is that more technology is available which makes things seem even more over the top.

exoticfruits · 15/12/2012 07:56

Children are not silly-they know what really matters.
Ignore it-go out on bike rides together-play board games together-have fun.

HollyBerryBush · 15/12/2012 07:56

We are in a media driven age.

An ipod is the equivalent of the cassette player you had at her age (7) - where as I am even older and didn't get a cassette player until I was 15 . I didn't have a telly in my room until I was 17 - but I bet 99% of parents here have a telly in pre-schoolers bedrooms.

Time moves on and we must move with it. You may think they are gadgets but as I said, in a media and computing driven world, it is important that these skills are learned from a young(er) age. My friends 20 month old can wave a tablet round and find CBBS etc, I cant even turn the damned thing on

Owlfright · 15/12/2012 08:04

holly I would be very surprised to think that 99% of preschoolers have a TV in their room. I might be way off the mark but I would have thought it unusual.

My DC (almost 6) doesn't have TV in her room. We have a TV in the sitting room, plus a Wii that she enjoys. She also loves playing on my iPad. She asked for a DS for Christmas but I feel she has access to enough gadgets so said no.

I do limit the amount if time she spends on the Wii and iPad, as there are so many other things to enjoy. After an initial whinge she generally gets stuck into something else.

BrianButterfield · 15/12/2012 08:04

A Blackberry tablet is under £100. In 1985 a cassette player was £21.99. That's the equivalent of £55.63 now.

DontmindifIdo · 15/12/2012 08:07

When you were 7 there wasn't that much more than cassette players without being massively overly expensive.

There was always some families that spent a large amount and others that didn't. There was always some who got a lot of small things, and others that got one big gift.

You know you sound like grandparents who talk about only getting a satsuma and a sugared mouse if they were lucky, don't you?

Witchety · 15/12/2012 08:09

I was wondering if this blackberry tablet was the freebie one you get when you take our a new phone contract

dishwashervodkaanddietirnbru · 15/12/2012 08:10

neither of mine have a tv in their room (age 6 and 9). We do have a Wii, xbox, PS3 and they have nintendos and cheapy laptops. DD also has an ipod nano and docking station in her room. They are getting tablets at christmas. I remember my dad having a computer when we were children but we were not allowed to touch it so I am glad we have moved on from then.

HollyBerryBush · 15/12/2012 08:13

I don't have any of that - Never have I been happer than when the xbox acqured the ring of death.

Desk top PC, a cranky old lappy, no other gaming consoles. I don't even have a smart phone because I'm too thick because they are just too complicated.

Sirzy · 15/12/2012 08:15

Ds is just turned 3 and doesn't have a TV in his room and won't for a long time!

He is getting a leappad for Christmas though. At first I was dead against anything like that but then realised that we live in a technological age and so children will be exposed to things much younger than seems normal to use. When I was at primary school we had one computer for the whole school, the nursery DS goes to have a smart board in the classroom.

As long as they don't spend every waking moment playing with these things its fine!

Staryeyed · 15/12/2012 08:19

I think that although it's important to keep up to date with technology, giving young kids ownership of such expensive things is ridiculous. We have an IPad in our house but it is mine and I let my children use it.

CabbageLeaves · 15/12/2012 08:24

DD has access to family PC but I don't want her to have a lap top. I want to see what she's doing

None of my DC have a TV in their rooms and never will. I'd never have one in the bedroom either.

DD is getting kindle fire for Christmas. I think she's ready to use it usefully. I have hated buying tat which doesn't get used. She will use this. She's not getting much else.

Few years ago money was v tight and I gave kids a budget of £20 each. DD2 told me she has great memories of that Christmas. She got roller skates.

I think the drive to spend to make Christmas special is so so off the mark. Christmas is about time with people you love and want to be with. Throwing money at it isn't going to give you that.

JoInScotland · 15/12/2012 08:25

We keep all the technology in the sitting room - computers, tablet, mobiles, etc. We don't have a telly, so none in the bedrooms! We limit screen time, and since I'm already an insomniac, I keep all that gadgetry out of the bedroom - which is for sleeping. My DP is in the IT dept at his work, so this stuff comes home whether I like it or not, and I do think it's important for children to be exposed to new technology, but it's much more important to play at the park, bake, dance, sing, etc.

bradywasmyfavouritewiseman · 15/12/2012 08:28

Dd is 8 and doesn't have a tv in her room.

She does have a tablet. op I think this is about more than money. Are you worried the kids will like the bikes more? And what impact they may have on their mother.
No, probably not.

MummyPig24 · 15/12/2012 08:28

I think too much technology is ridiculous. What's the point of it? We have a tv downstairs, I think early teens is appropriate for a tv in the bedroom but I'm not sure I'll ever deem it necessary. We have a ps3 that nobody ever plays on (dp got it pre children), we use it to watch dvds and love film on. Ds got a leappad for his 5th birthday and dp and I have smart phones. This is as much as I can tolerate right now, its verging on too much!

Really its up to parents what they buy, how much they spend. As a child I had everything I wanted from a pony to a tv in my room age 9. I don't have the money to give my children that but I'm not sure I'd want to. (well, I wouldn't mind a pony!)

mum2twoloudbabies · 15/12/2012 08:30

Well said sirzy there's also recent research showing that children who have access to tech, iPads, laptops and such like, learn better at school if they are using educational apps.

I agree Xmas does seem to get out of control but I don't think it's the type of presents more the quantity. We have bought very little for dcs because from what gps are saying they have bought stacks, which is lovely of them to care but they all go way over the top and I don't understand why.

HollyBerryBush I think you may have that the wrong way round, I would reckon 99% of pre-schoolers on here don't have a tv in their rooms. Mine don't and neither do we, bedrooms are for sleeping in.

peaceandlovebunny · 15/12/2012 08:32

times change.

akaemmafrost · 15/12/2012 08:37

I do quite at all this moaning about technology. I am sure our parents did the same about Walkmans! and held deep suspicions about those funny cards that let you get money out those new fangled cash machines ON A SUNDAY!

My dc have an IPad. Yesterday dd asked me about dinosaurs, I know squat about them so I downloaded an app about dinosaurs for 69p. We had a look and play together and then she spent the afternoon messing about on it. Today she knows more about dinosaurs than I ever have. I cannot, try as I might see anything negative about this.

cory · 15/12/2012 08:41

Mine haven't got many gadgets and certainly didn't have any when they were 7, but I'm not sure I can work up that much indignation about the children that do.

As Holly points out, they are the equivalent of the cassette players of years gone by (and no, I didn't get one of those either until I had left home). And probably represents a smaller part of their parents' income than the doll my mother got for Christmas in the 1930's.

Just as the cheap pair of trainers I got from Primark for ds cost nothing compared to the pair of shoes my grandfather had to share with his brother in the late 1800s, to go to school on alternative days.

But otoh the house my grandfather bought before my mother was born would be completely beyond our means.

Some things have got more expensive, some things have got cheaper. Sensible people make the most of the pleasures they can afford and don't hanker after the others. And a good skill to teach our children, as it's a pretty safe bet that it won't be the same things that represent a modest expenditure when they are grown up.

acceptableinthe80s · 15/12/2012 08:46

I actually feel sorry for the kids who have all this stuff handed to them on a plate. Ds's cousin who is 6 has a Wii, ds and is getting a tv for Christmas. His parents always have friends round and he just sits on his own playing his ds all the time. My friends teenager got her first laptop at 7, she's now 14 and on her 4th laptop and 4th iPhone having broke all previous ones. These kids are in for a shock when they grow up, they have no idea about the value of money/saving. My ds 4 gets pocket money and saves up for whatever he wants just like I did. When he's old enough he'll do chores to earn it.

Jingleallthejay · 15/12/2012 08:53

why has your daughter got all that at 7 a blackberry phone really ? you have indulged her that is why she is asking,

Jingleallthejay · 15/12/2012 08:54

oh she is your step daughter sorry misread well THEY have indulged her bloody madness , I am sorry for my rant at you it is early

reddwarf · 15/12/2012 09:14

Well, it does sound totally OTT to me. My 13 year old ds currently uses a 10 pounds handset, and will actually be getting a touch screen phone for Christmas. He will be delighted. He keeps nagging for a lap top, but I dodn't see any justification for one, and I've got age 15 in mind. None of my dc have, or will ever have, a TV in their bedroom. I have never had one, nor will my dc, while they live with me.

The bike sounds like a much better, and already generous enough gift to me. DOn't let what their mum does bother you. As long as they are not allowed unlimited screen time it should be ok, and hopefully you have plent of time to instil the value of things. TBH, my dc do not get unlimited stuff, but still don't have a clue. The plus side is, they wouldn't notice or care if their gift cost 20 or 80.

BertieBotts · 15/12/2012 09:16

Children have always asked for improbable things - who here wanted a pony or a puppy every year and never got one?

Jingleallthejay · 15/12/2012 09:18

MY dd is nearly 15 and getting her first laptop this christmas, I dont understand why people throw gadgets at little children when they either dont know how to use them or have no interest in them , getting presents that are 'to old ' for children is pointless and they see this as being grown up and demand more imo

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