Which one of us is being unreasonable........or are we both at fault?

[Earlybird]

I am friendly with our neighbour next door. We help each other out in a neighbourly fashion (collect parcels, etc), but do not socialise together.

Neighbour has a very successful decorating business. He and his team have done work for me in the past. For big jobs, we are more formal and he gives an estimate. For smaller jobs, we don't bother with that formality.

His team did several jobs for me a few weeks ago - I thought they were 'smallish' because they didn't take a long time (a few hours each), and we never discussed price. I was floored to receive a bill that was 2-3x more than I imagined (my mental estimate was an educated guess based on his past work/invoices).

I queried the bill with his wife, who does his accounting. She told me that mostly he gives me a discounted 'mates rate', but was not able to do so on these jobs (no reason given). He never told me that this would be a 'client rate' job.

I have had the bill a week as of today, and his wife sent me an email last night asking if I could pay today.

While I am hugely grateful for what he has done in the past, and understand that he might not be able to do it every time, I feel he should have spoken to me about it upfront.

If he is going to treat me as a mate, then I am happy to make every attempt to pay much more quickly than usual. But, if treats me as a client (especially without clarifying this and explaining why), then I expect to be able to treat this as a normal bill and take up to 30 days to pay it. IMO, he can't have it both ways.

So, who is being unreasonable?

BTW, I am posting this and going out for the rest of the day so will not respond until later.

YABU you have been very lucky to get so much work done so cheaply in the past and then have the cheek to complain when he charges the going rate.

In the past, when he has given you a formal quote, has his invoice said you can have 30 days to pay?

If so, I think it's fair for you to expect that this time.

It really depends on whether he usually (with fully paying clients) expects payment on completion or within 30 days.

Agree with Allergic. He has done a significant amount of work for you, so you should pay the commercial rate and pay it now. Tradesmen usually require payment on completion, and often charge for materials in advance. You can't really expect him to give you special treatment all the time.

Pay him, it sounds as if he needs the cash flow.

I run my own business, working 90% of the time for large companies so the best I can hope for is a company to actually pay attention to my 30 days terms. It is such a pain when I have other people to pay etc. They could pay much faster and it would make my life so much easier if they would. He did the work, or rather his team did who now need paying. Just cough up.

I can see both sides. I have recently had some work done and the invoice said payable in 30 days but I usually pay within a few days of completion. I always get a written quote too beforehand. Possibly he felt taken advantage of but he should have said beforehand that he would have to charge you the going rate.
Personally I would pay up asap and put it down to experience but next time use someone else or get a written quote.

If you didn't KNOW you were getting "mates rates" then how is it taking the p*ss to politely ask about the cost this time round? I've no idea what a decorater would cost, and if the OP has only used her neighbour to do the work then how would she know what a decorators' would charge normally?

You're cross that he didn't explain why he's not giving you "mates rates" this time? Possibly becuase he doesn't want to offend or embarass you by saying "I have to turn down well paying work to do your jobs, this took a couple days and it's just costing me too much to do all these favours which you're not able to return".

I think you are both being slightly unreasonable. He should have told you he would no longer be charging you "mates' rates" for whatever reason before doing the work, but you should absolutely definitely always ask for a quote for work first, even if the person doing it is actually your best mate!

You were unreasonable not to get a quote and he was unreasonable not to give one. More your responsibility though - why anyone would not get a quote for anything it utterly beyond me - and yes, it?s very cheeky to expect lower rates. It?s also very petty not to pay him straight away.

Just pay him and next time make sure you ask how much a jobs going to cost

After running my own business for over a decade I am very cagey now about doing work for mates - the OP shows everyone why. Yes, OP, YABU. You should have got a quote - now all you can do is pay up and chalk it down to experience. You did very well to get mates rates before, seeing you're not actually mates.

IME people who are being offered mates rates tend to undervalue what you do, and are far more likely to look horrified at the bill than normal clients. They think "oh, it's only a bit of a hand," they underestimate your skill and the costs you incur to do the work.

As for friends of friends, I've had such bad experiences that I don't even go there...

What are the payment terms on the invoice he submitted? His wife shouldn't be chasing until you are past them really.

YABU

You owe the man the money, so pay him as soon as possible.

He might have got fed up doing jobs free or cheap as it was stopping him doing other fully paid work.

Times are hard and it's Christmas. He deserves to be paid for the work he's carried out.

OP should have got an estimate, but it seems from her post that she was not aware that previous jobs had been charged at 'mates rates' but rather thought that was the going rate - so its a bit unfair to lambast her for wanting something on the cheap! In which case he is being a bit unreasonable too. But not sure what you can do other than express this to the guy / his wife, stump up and ensure a quote is received in future.