To hope my fanjo can be reborn...

[LesboMum]

Hello

This is my first post. I have two DCs, the youngest is five. One was 9lbs delivered with forceps and one was 10lbs followed by manual removal of placenta (the hand-up-a-cow method). About a zillion stitches on both occasions.

To be frank I think my fanjo is battle scarred!

I've got a cough and EVERY time I cough I wee. Also, my vagina is shorter than it was. When I use a tampax I can feel it because it won't quite insert fully. Also I can feel the walls of my vagina at the entrance - not protruding but sort of sagging a bit.

I has a smear about a month ago and told the nurse I was a bit concerned. She said it didn't look like a prolapse but said I should see a doctor if I was worried.

So why not see a doctor? Well apart from a natural desire not to wave my bits at strangers it's because my usual doctor has left so I'll have to take a punt on one of the new (young, glamourous!) ones. Also, my partner is a woman and since they'll inevitably ask if sex is affected, I'll have to out myself, have my fanjo prodded and then discuss lesbian sex. Marvellous!

So, could pelvic floor exercises help? I've done them but I'm fairly sure I'm not doing them right/often enough. Or do I have to face the doctor?

Please share your stories of fanjo resurrection!

Many thanks in advance.

I think you have to face your doctor. However, I am one to talk, as I have not faced the doctor either.

You really do need to see a dr, you'll probably need to see a specialist and can get womens physio. You don't need to talk about anything you don't want to.

I have by the way, I've had half the county have a look up my foof, and had a few procedures, now seeing a specialist physio.

I have no stories of fanjo resurrection but you really need to see your GP. The GP isn't going to want to discuss sex, lesbian or other, with you - they will be way more interested in fixing your bits. If they reference your sex life, tell them the truth - I'm sure you're not the only lesbians in the village, so to speak.

Yes, see a doctor, the incontinence and tampon problems warrant a referral, if they ask are you having problems with sex answer yes or no and leave it at that. Come over and post on the Any Old Prolapse thread in General Health, there are lots of us there with similar issues and lots of experience.

Hi

You're all lovely! Thank you very much. I had no idea there was a prolapse thread - I'll head over there now (my spiritual home - a place I can sag with pride!).

Galaxy - I know, let's go to the doctor together...

Thanks everyone.

Yes go to the doctors

I had to and was referred to a wonderful gynae physio who really changed it all

But every time I go for a smear the awful smear nurse comments as my fango goes the opposite way from normal - only discovered in childbirth and is why I can't use tampax and took forever to get preggers. It really makes me feel awful. Next time, I will have to say something.

Thanks Chablis. Sorry to hear about the comments - just tell her yours is perfect and everyone else's is the wrong way round!

Please don't be scared of seeing the doctor. You would be amazed at how common post birth problems can be.

Go to the doctor, I've recently seen a physio for recovery from a third degree tear they really can help. In the grand scheme of things what would you rather, coughing when you wee for the rest of your life or a slightly uncomfortable conversation with a healthcare professional?

I agree with the others, I'm currently seeing a physio about a prolapse and destroyed pelvic floor muscles. Exercises will help but mine were so damaged I couldn't tell if I was doing them or not so they gave me a machine to stimulate them. I could have clenched away till the cows come home and it wouldn't have helped!

Your gp will ask you if sex is affected but you just say yes or no, if they ask for details they are just being nosy!

Also didn't realise there was a prolapse thread, I might head over and join the saggers too!

You are just meat to a Dr and lesbian sex isn't a secret or shocking either.

I used the Athenafem . Expensive but well wiorh it

Hi OP,

If it is affecting your self-esteem, which sounds likely, then it shouldn't matter whether sex is affected or not. All you need to say is that yes sex is affected as you are too self-concsious to have sex. That should neatly deflect from talking about lesbian sex if you don't want to yet illustrate that sex is an issue for you.

Good luck.

I know LesboMum. I know. Added complication is I have just moved house, so it will be a case of register with Dr, "Hello Ms/Mr Doctor, take a look at my fanjo". Sigh.

Ask for womens health physio before considering any surgery- they are great!

Ok I'm convinced. I'll make an appointment with the doctor. Thanks so much for all taking the time to reply. I know it's the best thing to do.

Thanks again!