to think my friend should have her dog put down?

[greenshaker]

I really hope I don't come across as harsh.

Basically my friend has a dog, who she has had 15 years (the dog is 17 now!)

Every time I see my friend she always says how the dog keeps being sick, she poops and wees on the floor, she falls over constantly (which I have witnessed for myself), the latest incident was she fell over and was unable to get up and wet herself through fright and this was during the night so she wasn't found until the early hours because she was crying. She is also on medication for life.

The dog is dearly loved and cared for so much. But I feel so sad every time I hear a different story about her.

I think the dog seems to be in pain and suffers, but because she's such a big part of the family they are maybe being selfish by keeping her alive and that the nicest thing to do would be to let her go.

Just want to say that just because a dog is old that doesn't mean they should be put down, but if they are constantly suffering then maybe its for the best to end their pain.

Aibu?

I don't think I would say this to my friend because I feel it would just upset her.

Has she seen a vet about this? Is there anything that can be done that they're choosing not to do?

My sister's dog was like this. I told her that the dog was suffering and she should do the right thing for him. She did and seems to have forgiven me several weeks later!

It's a bit of a tricky one. My dog is also really old and just lies about these days napping - he's happy enough though. If he was in pain, I would get him put down as I can't stand the thought of him suffering for one minute.

I think if it got to the stage where he was unable to get up after a fall, I would get him put down.

I can totally understand why people take ages though, they are part of your family. I dread my dog going, he's been my best friend :(

This sounds like my childhood dog. Incontinent, with a permanent cough, fell over a lot. We spent a lot of heartache, time tears and vet advice on that dog. Until we decided to have our beloved puppy PTS the vet, and we, were convinced that the dog was not in a lot of pain and was enjoying life. Eventually another health concern came up that seriously impacted her pain and we decided to let her go.

By all means talk to your friend about her dog and it's health but please don't tell her to PTS her friend.

Obviously having had her for 15 years she is very much part of the family.

I wouldn't say anything to my friend because it would upset her and I don't want a falling out over it.

Just hurts me to see an animal in pain, but I do understand that its hard to say goodbye.

My friend had a cat who was sick frequently, incontinent and couldn't go out. She couldn't bear to have him put down and he was in a state for months. Her mother insisted she took him to the vets to be put to sleep in the end. Sometimes people can't bear to make that move. IMO it is cruel but sort of understandable they should still do it though :(

It sounds like a heartbreaking situation. We had a similar thing years ago with our family dog and one day we came home to our parents saying she had died in her sleep. Mum had actually taken her to the vets to be put to sleep and lied about it for years (including to my Dad!). She was the one who was at home all day and she said in the end she couldn't bear to see the dog in such a mess (incontinent, difficulty walking etc). She took her to the vet and he suggested the time had come, she had had a good life and we should let her slip away with dignity. Mum said it was actually very peaceful and she was thankful she was able to hold her up until the very end.

It's difficult to comment on your friend's situation, but her vet should really be guiding her on this. Does the dog see the vet regularly?

My dad had to put my mum's dog down last week. My mum passed away 8 yrs ago and left a border collie x. The dog was about 15 or so, incontinent, with severe hip dysplasia, she lost tons of weight and was suffering from canine dementia. I didn't want him to put her down, but when I went to visit I was shocked at the state of the dog, and told him it was for the best. She didn't even recognize me or bother to lift her head - it was incredibly sad.

But when my dog was due to be put down, I cancelled the vet's appointment 3 times. So it really depends...your friend can't bear to lose her family member but if she is incontinent, and falling over that can't be a good quality of life.

Poor dog he has no quality of life now if he's in pain and falling over. I think getting him put to sleep is the last act of love and kindness she could do for him

She is BVU. I love my cats dearly but would not be selfish enough to keep them alive and in pain because of my own feelings. Its cruel. Animals are luckier than humans in that they don't have to die in pain and suffering as there is the option to get them put down.

My beloved Coco is 14 and blind, she still enjoys a play but sleeps 20 out of 24 hours. She still goes for a wee outside most of the time, a couple of times i haven't been quick enough, she smells and is always getting an ear infection, but it goes in the spring. We used to walk 6 miles a day now its up the street and she turns for home after 50 yards. I hold on to her cos as sad as this sounds she is my best friend and I hers.

OMG - go and dig out your old GCSE text of Of Mice and Men.

I think it depends really. Presumably, as you say the dog is very well cared for and is on lifelong medication, she has discussed the situation with her vet? If so, unless the vet is telling her that PTSD would be the best option and she can't stand to, then I think YABU, but I can see why you'd feel that way.

Some dogs would be distressed by incontinence, others not so much. I personally wouldn't have a dog PTS because it couldn't get up by itself once although I would see a vet to discuss afterwards, but I would be changing the living situation so the dog couldnt be left like that if it happened again and if it happened several times then I probably would PTS.

I do firmly believe we owe it to our animals not to let them suffer.

YANBU to think it but please don't tell your friend what you think, she's probably thinking the same thing and trying to gird her loins to do the deed, its the worst part of having a pet.
When we got our dog my parents were pretty clear that when he got to the point where he couldn't get out the door to go to the toilet we would look into getting him put down. Umpteen years later when he did get to that point dad built him a ramp to help him get up and down the stairs because none of us could bear to lose him.
stephrick I came off night shift and cried like a wee girl the day the poor wee dog was put down but it was the best thing we could do for him at that point. You kind of know in your heart when you're putting your feelings over their health and until that day comes just keep doing the best you can for them.

That was my beloved dog last year (well he was not quite that bad). I knew deep down that it was his time and i was being selfish, but i still needed that last nudge and this lady didn't say anything it was the look on her face when she met my dog that did it. The actual process is very peaceful, i do think that maybe you should say something, of course she will be upset but it may be what she needs.

It sounds to me like the quality of life this dog has is now very limited. I always say it's better to pts a week too soon than a day too late There is nothing served by allowing pets to suffer and it's our responsibility to ensure that this doesn't happen.