to think smart trousers are a suitable alternative to a dress?

[freddiefrog]

We're going to a friend's wedding just after Christmas, so have been on the hunt for outfits for my girls. It's a late afternoon wedding, quite relaxed and informal.

DD2 (7) loves geting dressed up and the flouncier the dress, the happier she is, so her outfit has been easy to sort out.

DD1 on the other hand absolutely hates dresses or skirts, and usually lives in jeans, trousers or shorts, so I've bought her some smart trousers, with a little jacket to wear.

Upon chatting with other friends it would seem that we're committing some sort of wedding fashion faux pas, its disrespectful as 'girls should wear dresses'

I don't see that I should force her into a dress and make her feel uncomfortable and self-conscious for a day

[Hobbitation]

Smart trousers and jacket sounds good. I would probably have wanted to wear the same at that age, having just discovered I could wear trousers without people thinking I was a boy

[cardibach]

REally? 'women should wear dresses'? Are you in the 1950s? I rarely wear a dress to any occasion and don;t see why I should!

[SledYuleCated]

Oh heaven forbid a woman should wear what she's comfortable with lest she look silly

What fucking age are we living in?! Seriously, I cannot believe there are people on this thread saying women should wear dresses whether they want to or not. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!

[magicpainting]

I wore my black work trousers and a smart top to my brother's wedding. I don't think it's childish - I have never worn a dress or skirt in my life and I'm not going to start for a wedding! You're all mad. Well, those suggesting there's something wrong with trousers are.

[cardibach]

Moet really? ONly kids can wear trousers, a grown woman who chooses to is 'childish'? I thought these sort of stupid (I use the word advisedly) attitudes had disappeared around about 1969. Any other reactionary and sexist attitudes you want to admit to?

[hugoagogo]

I wore trousers for my own wedding.

How ridiculous.

[NamingOfParts]

Good grief, I'm glad I dont get invited to weddings (we are at the inbetween stage) as I dont own any dresses or skirts.

I am always amazed when people trot out Style & Beauty tips from the 1950s as being the right thing for a wedding.

[SledYuleCated]

Tell you what, find me a man, Ill invite you all to the wedding and insist that its trousers only.

[UterusUterusGhaLaLaLaLaLi]

Terra

My immediate family got into jeans at my wedding the second the speeches were made.

I'm sure your dd will look lovely.

[BlackholesAndRevelations]

Do heterosexual brides wear trousers?! (sorry!! Just curiou! )

11 year old in trousers= not a problem, and surely no one should care or judge anyway?

[freddiefrog]

Thanks!

These friends are mostly parent-y type friends, and their eldest children are all the same age as my youngest so they're all still of an age where mum's opinion still counts for something, and that's that young girls should wear pretty party frocks

DD1 at 11 is by far the eldest and has very strong opinions on what she wears and as long as its appropriate, I'm happy to respect them

I just do not agree that she should wear something she dislikes and makes her feel uncomfortable, when there's a perfectly appropriate alternative

[LRDtheFeministDude]

black - yes.

[hugoagogo]

Do heterosexual brides wear trousers?!

[Hobbitation]

To weddings I have worn stuff like a cream trouser suit, a black sleeveless blouse and a black trilby hat, a sleeveless satin silver grey embroidered top and matching 3/4 length trousers. And that was ten years ago.

[Hobbitation]

Lesbian brides sometimes wear dresses.

[DewDr0p]

Wow. I've worn trousers to weddings loads of times. What a social pariah I must be.

Your dd's outfit sounds lovely btw.

[squeakytoy]

Party frocks are lovely on girls upto the age of about 8 or 9.. no self respecting 11 year old would be seen dead in one..

nothing wrong with smart trousers and a nice top..

I dont often wear dresses and have worn trousers and tops to the last few weddings and social occasions I have been to..

[BlackholesAndRevelations]

Oh lighten up Hugo. I was genuinely curious, as I know lesbian brides wear dresses but have never ever seen or heard of a bride wearing trousers when marrying a man.

[EasilyBored]

Smart wedding clothes are smart wedding clothes - dress, skirt, trousers, whatever. Can't believe this is even up for discussion

[SledYuleCated]

Blackholes It was a bit of a dim question. Have you seriously never conceived of a bride wearing trousers to marry a man??

[MoetEtPantsOn]

cardi sorry I meant that I found her attitude to be childish rather than her clothing. Dress codes at weddings can be annoying, but if it's black tie then a tshirt and trousers doesn't look right. Anyway not very relevant to the OP's dilemma so will butt out.

[FivesGoldNorks]

My dd is 3 and refuses to wear dresses. She has a craggy pair of "party shorts" (hand me down from big brother) that she gets out for special occasions

[EdithWeston]

My DM wore trousers to my traditional white wedding.

I really don't see the problem with anyone wearing trousers, as long as you look as if you have made the effort to dress up for the Occasion. (And I'm someone who thinks both black and white are major faux pas among guests, so not exactly an 'anything goes' type).