not to feed my baby? (NOT bf/ff!)

[MichaelaS]

My lovely DS2 and I are exploring baby led weaning as I sometimes still have to spoon feed DS1 at 3.5 years and am not going down that route again. Other than weaning, we are bf on demand, and co sleeping. We followed the recommendations to wean from 6 months onwards.

I offer him food at least 4 times a day, and usually he will happily gum some toast crusts, suck at fruit, slurp pasta shapes or nibble veggies. I have also tried to spoon feed him purees a bit, but he does not like it and closes his mouth, looks away, and hits the spoon away. He loves yoghurt and will tolerate a bit of spoon feeding for that, but anything else is rejected as soon as he works out its not yoghurt. I started purees because I was feeling a bit guilty about the amount he is eating - or not eating more like. I don't think he is actually getting much into his tummy. He holds a lot, gums a lot, and throws most of it on the floor. His fine motor control is still developing, and he doesn't always get food into his mouth. I understand this is part of baby led weaning, and am not bothered about the mess.

Yesterday I realised that he is now 8 months old, and barely eating much volume, although he likes lots of tastes. Today I mentioned it to the HV at weight clinic, and she was a bit when she realised he is still taking milk every 3 hours or so, and wakes twice at night for milk. She thinks I need to feed him more... but how? Any ideas? I am feeling guilty now, like I'm deliberately starving him or something!

His weight gain is good and he's following his centile line. He's happy and healthy apart from reflux which is under control with medication. He is quite a bad sleeper but always has been since birth so I don't think its due to being hungry. Am I a bad mother? How do you persuade a baby to eat more if they are happy with a couple of pea sized blobs each meal?

some babies are not that interested in food at 7-8 months, it might not even be due to the blw. my 2nd one used to spit everything out, and wouldn't eat, until about 8 months. and he was not blw i did the puree spoon feeding thing with him. he got the hang of it eventually. maybe she is just taking her time, i think hv overreacting

I did BLW with dd2. I didn't really have a choice, little madam wouldn't let me feed her from a spoon. She didn't start really eating properly until she was around 9 months old. She was still on bottles then and was a bonny little thing so I wasn't worried about her weight. She didn't stop having bottles of formula until she was nearly 3.

See you ate a good mum, your DC1 needs to take the food how you can get it to them due to the SN so don't sweat problem causing, he won't be doing it at 19 is a well worn phrase!

DD2 is BF and BLW she won't take purées either really and messes with solids apart from rusks shhh, she feeds about 2 billion times a night, your HV would hate me

Are not ate, eating a mum would be odd

I feel fraudulent here because DD is just over 6 months and has been blw for about 3 weeks so can hardly claim success but what has worked for me to boost intake is eating with her and offering what i am eating. Discovered she loves cheese scones! Bit of bread soaked in soup, a bite of omlette etc. means you need to be careful what you eat and how you cook it (salt avoidance) but she basically much prefers what i am having to the lovingly cut up sticks of finger food.

The other thing that works ok is coating stuff in expressed breast milk, rusks and porridge only really work if they taste of her familiar breakfast.

And ignore the daft HV, mine contradicts themselves and each other at every turn, so i just ignore them now.

The blw mantra is food before 1 is just for fun, I honestly wouldn't worry my just turned 20 month old has just started to actually eat anywhere near properly. He survived on air and breast milk until now. Have you read the gill rapley book it might give you some confidence but I think if they are full beans and happy then all is well!

ust to add my own experience, DS basically ate bugger all til 9.5 months when suddenly a switch flicked on and he demolished everything he was given. All the playing with the food is the important part at this stage.