to ask if visitors plan to spend time here or just drop a present and run?

[familyfun]

im a sahm with a school age child and a toddler, i take the toddler to playgroups 3 morns a week and she sleep all afternoon.
everyone assumes im in all the time so can drop by anytime with xmas presents to suit them.
i dont mind missing a playgroup morn if i know someone is coming to see us and have a chat but im fed up of staying in all morning waiting for someone to come round, then they drive up at 11 chuck a present at me and say they must go as they are busy.
i have wasted a morn and toddler is bored for nothing.
so aibu to say, "are you coming for a visit, in which case il stay in, or are you just driving past, in which case il be out"

I don't think it's unreasonable but that's because I too used to go out 4/5 mornings to avoid being stuck at home with a restless toddler

I would say, "What time will you be coming over? I take DC to playgroup 9-11, but I can stay at home if you want to come for a cuppa".

That way they can choose to pop by later if its a quick drop off, and you will know if you are having a visit.

What a terrible problem it must be to have hordes of people bringing you presents!

Tell people you're busy on x,y and z mornings?

thats brilliant oreocrumbs, i can never think how to work things wothout sounding rude
i would love to stay in and catch up for a chat with them but get left feeling like a mug for sitting in all morn when clearly they had no intentions of coming in.

Ditto what oreocrumbs said. Just ask people, then you know.

misscellania, i dont mean to sound ungrateful and it lovely that they want to buy for my dcs, but i dont want to stay in from now till xmas for no reason. im happy to be in in someone wants to visit us.

I think this is the kind of thing they coined the phrase first world problems for.

what you should say is I am going out today and wont be back till 'this' time so if you can make it after that ta muchy A lot of people just have so much on but they cant expect you to stick around yanbu to ask them what their plans are,

My goodness is this normal? To have such a large number of people dropping presents off in the first week of December that it's causing you all this angst?

I don't think my friends and family are making NEARLY enough effort.
I might issue a memo.

Just say "we are out most mornings but will be in after lunch if you want to drop.by then?"

What is wrong with my family???? I don't think I have ever stayed in for ANYONE because NO-ONE has ever driven past and chucked a present at me, never mind staying in for an entire month!