I have begged and pleaded and heard nothing.

[CanAnyoneHearMe]

My Fiancé ended our 3 year relationship, I have a 14 month old DS and I found out 2 days after him walking out that I am pregnant.

I want him back, Plain and simple. I text him throughout the day pleading him to give us a chance and he doesn't reply.

We are meeting this weekend so he can see DS and I have said that I want to talk to him when we meet, He said that he won't change his mind.

I wrote a 5 page letter, Pouring my heart out to let him know how I feel as he walked out and didn't give me a chance to say anything.

I keep texting him and I can't help it, He left because he said that he had fallen out of love with me because I wasn't the girl he met (Have PND, Panic attacks and Anxiety, Which I am having talking therapy for. I had one session before he walked out) I understand it has been hard to live with me as I haven't been myself because of it but I am totally heartbroken and completely devastated.

It has been 1 week today, I need him, I want him and I cannot deal with life without him.

What should I do?

Sorry but AIBU has more traffic and I feel so alone right now.

Excellent post Edith OP take time to read it.

Please please stop begging and pleading. It won't make a difference to him, it sounds like he has made up his mind and isn't about to change it. Try and act indifferent to him, it will be difficult, but it will help with your self esteem.
I know how you feel, I was the same this time last year when my DH upped and left. It wasn't until I started acting indifferently towards him that he realised I was getting on with my own life - without him! Long story short, we are back together, but I can honestly say that it wasn't until I started getting on with my life that he realised what he had lost!

One day, it will suddenly dawn on your that he is an immense waste of space and completely undeserving of your love. I promise you, you will not miss him forever, you will not want him back forever. One day you will think 'thank fuck I escaped from a lifetime with that tosspot'.

Just to review the facts: he's walked out on you, out of the blue, without discussing with you that he had been having doubts about the relationship and deciding together that things had run their course.

That alone makes him a massive wanker and not someone worth pining over. I know you won't see that at the moment, but one day you will.

I think you've posted about this before very recently and I'll repeat what I said then. If you have family or friends nearby who can look after you for a bit, then ask them for it. Reach out for that help and keep yourself busy as much as you can. Set yourself little targets and be proactive about moving forward with your life. You have a new baby coming - so start to prepare for that. Think about where you want to live, what plans you want to make for the baby. Assume in all and every instance that you will be doing this without the input of your ex.

A turning point for me in realising that my relationship with my ex was definitely over was buying my own copy of a box set of DVDs we'd shared whilst together. Sounds small but to me it said that I was acknowledging no longer being part of that unit. Once I did that, the rest just fell into place.

You'll get there, honestly.

I couldn't not post after reading your post.

Sweetheart, I'm so sorry that you're hurting so much, but really and truly, everyone so far is completely right, and I'm willing to bet have gone through this too at some point.

You're grieving, grieving what you thought was your future, and in my very humble little experience, I've found treating the person as a completely new entity I.e. the person I thought I knew no longer/does not exist helps a little.

You know when people put on a brave face and that saying fake it to make it? It works, even if your on complete autopilot or feel a fraud, eventually you start believing it and feeling stronger.

You're most certainly not alone, look at the people who've taken the time to post heartfelt advice to you on this one thread.

This is one moment, all you have to do is get through this one and can deal with whatever happens next as it comes.

OP - I've been in your situation - Fiance left after three years.

The previous posters are right in what they say - he had someone else. Its exceptionally likely that this is the case with your ex-fiance too.

Please please realise that if you do get him back you will be living on tenterhooks, he will have the upper hand and you will spend a lot of time feeling incredibly insecure. At the moment you are heartbroken, but I think if you can get through the next few weeks you will start to feel angry that he could do this to you - and you should feel angry, you're pregnant and he is behaving like an absolute shit.

You need to get some real life support and limit your contact with this man as much as possible - stop the texts - you might think you want him back but it really won't be the best for you in the long run.

A decade later I have a wonderful DH, and had not seen ex-fiance for all those years when he stopped me in the street - I felt a wave of relieve that he was not married to me and I had essentially 'escaped'. You will feel relief to not be with this man at some point - I know you don't believe me now, but it will happen.

I'm sorry you are hurting so much. But begging and pleading is not going to help, and will just make you feel worse.

Get some real life support in place, and keep posting on here (MN has got me through some horrible times).

Look after yourself and your son. You don't need him, as much as you feel that way right now. You will be okay. Keep contact to a minimum, keep yourself composed when you do see him.

Many hugs to you.

Oh sweetheart, this must feel like the end of the world.

There are never any guarantees in life but I'll bet that if you atop texting and giving someone else the power of your happiness and keep at your therapy and take full responsibility for what happens in your life, then you will never again feel as shit as you do today.

There is some real sense and kindness here, in these posts and its all for YOU. There's something that isn't crap.