Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to leave my baby for 2 nights?

63 replies

lilypaige · 01/12/2012 02:49

Hi all
I have a 7 month old dd who is my world. Ive been asked on a hen weekend which would mean leaving my dd from friday teatime until sunday morning, with my mum who dd is very close to. What do people think about this? Part of me is really wanting to go as im a single mum, im with my daughter 24/7 so would be nice to have a break. The other part of me is thinking iv never been away from daughter that long and how would I cope?! Thanks for any replies x

OP posts:
PrincessOfChina · 01/12/2012 09:01

I do this regularly - DD is 21 months now but first stayed home with Daddy for the weekend at 12 weeks ish when I went on a hen do.

Since then I've travelled for work, been on several more hen do's and DP and I try to go out every month or so too so she stays with GP's then.

SirBoobAlot · 01/12/2012 09:02

I don't know if I could do that. I'd certainly go for one night, but don't think I'd manage two.

Are you breastfeeding?

maddening · 01/12/2012 09:03

Go for it! Have a fab time. Can you stay at your mum's with dd on the Thursday night so she's all settled when you go? Then when you get back go out for Sunday lunch with your mum and dd? It'll be a lovely weekend for all of you.

mosschops30 · 01/12/2012 09:04

Very sad about some replies on here (lovebunny I am looking at you)

IMHO it's very important to have some adult time for yourself, plus it gives your children a great sense of independence too, especially when they are with other adults who care about them too.

Me and Dh have had a weeks holiday alone for the last two years and its been amazing. I've also been away for work twice in the last 2 months, I'm not sure they even notice I'm goneGrin.

Go and enjoy it Smile

maddening · 01/12/2012 09:04

Oh and do ignore lovebunny who is bu

DinosaursOnAnAdventCalender · 01/12/2012 09:11

I wouldn't (I am a single parent to three and my youngest is 17 months) the older boys I wouldn't think twice about leaving for a weekend - infact they are on a cub camp at the moment but I couldn't leave my baby Blush

I don't think it would be wrong if you did though, and I think you should. The fact that I can't says more about me and my insecurities than anything else.

He will have to stay away over night soon as I will be in hospital having ds4, I am dreading it.

LaQueen · 01/12/2012 09:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LaQueen · 01/12/2012 09:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GoldPlatedNineDoors · 01/12/2012 09:23

Yanbu. At all. Go, have a great time, and plan in a couple of days of bonding time when you get back.

I left dd for the weekend when she was 9mo to go for a weekend away in London and while I missed her, I also had a great time.

I have three hen weekends booked in next year and while I know I will miss her, I also am.looking forward to no worrying about bottles of dinners or get woken at 5am.

I would draw the line at more than a weekend though - we have been invited to NZ over new year but I wont leave dd and taking a one year old on an eighteen hour journey scares the shit out of me. DH is going on his own, and we have some good stuff to do together scheduled for the time he is away.

LaQueen · 01/12/2012 09:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mosschops30 · 01/12/2012 09:24

LaQueen is the voice of reason this morning Grin
I agree with everything you said.

FWIW I can't imagine a life where I never spend time away from my children

TheReturnOfBridezilla · 01/12/2012 09:28

Go! Enjoy yourself! I've never been away for mine for longer than a night but have a weekend-long hen party to go to next summer and can't wait! They are three and one and very hard work at the moment. My husband has had several week-long snowboarding holidays and boys' weekends away since they have been born and nobody judges him so I don't see why it shouldn't be the same for us!

LaQueen · 01/12/2012 09:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

monkeyfacegrace · 01/12/2012 09:31

I fucked off to Dubai for a few days when my dd was 8 months. Left her with grandparents.

I had a lovely tan, as I could lie by the pool as long as I liked!

Go.

Arthurfowlersallotment · 01/12/2012 09:43

Go, and don't feel bad.
I have a 7mo DD so I understand you'll find it difficult.
Think of the rest you'll have.. And when you're back on Sunday you'll be so excited to see your DD.

I can't do any overnighters yet as mine is still bf and wakes at 4 for a feed, but I'm looking forward to the time when I can. Enjoy yourself.

Boringbitch · 01/12/2012 09:56

Do it!
Your dd will be looked after and you can have a break and a weekend away.
Have a great time (if you go).

showmethetoys · 01/12/2012 10:04

I think it was lovebunny who wasnt allowed the push her own grandchild around in it's pram, because her daughter doesn't want anyone to push it apart from herself. So I think major issues have been passed down in her family anyway.

Everything that laqueen said. Go. And enjoy it!

lola88 · 01/12/2012 10:05

I would def go i'm sure your mum is more than capible to caring for your child or you wouldn't think about leaving her and you DD will love being spoiled rotten for the weekend.

toomanydaisies · 01/12/2012 10:12

Try it for 1 night and see how you cope. If your dd has a strong bond with your Mum then she'll be ok for a short separation (1 or 2 nights). Have fun!

Pilgit · 01/12/2012 10:13

I did this when DD was about 8-10 weeks old. It was FAB. Missed her like crazy but loved getting the full nights sleep and catching up with lots of girly mates. I was officially the boring mummy who wouldn't/couldn't stop talking about her but my friends all humoured me! I'm with LaQueen as well - enabling such lovely relationships with Grandparents from such a young age is only a positive thing for both the DC's and the DGPs! Go, have a great time and don't have any regrets about it.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 01/12/2012 10:17

Actually I feel that some form of me time and social interaction beyond your DC's is really important. I don't mean leaving them every night of the week or a fortnight's holiday away from them, just maybe half an hour now and again for a coffee on your own or an evening class once a week. TIme to recharge your batteries and interact with other adults makes you a better parent IMVHO.

bedmonster · 01/12/2012 10:21

GO GO GO GO GO!!!!!!! If you trust your mum and think she will be able to cope, I say definitely!
But then I've always had a good social life before having my dc, and that hasn't stopped.
I left the 3 Dc earlier this Dp while I swanned around Rome with friends. Youngest dc was 7 months. Everyone had a lovely time, and I didn't miss baby ds half as much as people thought I would, only phoned once in 3 days!!
I think its important to still be a person in your own right, aswell as being mum.

ArielThePiraticalMermaid · 01/12/2012 10:26

YANBU.

As long as you don't leave her on her own, obviously ;)

Cbh1978 · 01/12/2012 10:29

Go. Left 11mth old for two nights as doing a Masters that requires weekend studies. He came with me on two weekends as I was breastfeeding but he chose to stop, which was handy in a way for that weekend!
He wasn't bothered I was gone and wasn't that fussed when I came back!
We often remark how amazing single mums are. Go!

HenriettaChicken · 01/12/2012 10:34

I have a 7 month old and I would definitely do this!

I would also find it very difficult because I am always around him! Irrational guilt and all that... This just shows how important it is that you really should go.

It'll be great for everyone. If you're bf- ing there may be a few expressing issues - take a pump so you don't leak all over that gorgeous dress - but other than that GO!!!!