Stalker girls?

[friendshipdramas]

DD is in year 7 and enjoying new school. However, three girls who she was friendly with at primary seem to be "stalking" her. She had a disagreement with one of the girls early in the first term so all three stopped talking to her.

She was quite upset about one of the girl's but accepted it, moved on and made new friends.

DD tells me that whenever she has joined a new club and the three girls find out, they join too then spend the time giving her "nasty looks".

She has been ignoring it but I think it's wearing her down a bit now. I picked her up after school from a club she has been attending since september and the three girls have now joined that. They are quite clever in that they make sure no one else notices their behaviour to DD. One of the girl's comes across as very sweet and innocent so if DD was to tell other's they probably wouldnt believe her.

They also pursue any girl my DD becomes friendly with or talks to. They appear to be trying to isolate DD. DD says that they dont want her to be happy and whenever they see or joking and smiling with other girls they sneer at her.

WIBU to advise DD to confront them and call them out on their behaviour and do it with others around? Or should I stay completely out of it and let DD deal with it herself (ignoring it)?

Thanks

Why can't you talk to the school about this? So the teachers can speak to their parents?

Sorry my dd is only 5 so no experience but that's the route I'd think i
I'd take,

That's not stalking,it's bullying. You should talk to the school regardless of what advice you give your daughter.

It is bullying and I am going through an extremely similar thing with my DD3 at the moment who is only in Year 5. You have to talk to the school and let them know that you don't want to interfere and you realise that your DD has to learn to cope with this but that you feel she has done remarkably well and it has just been going on too long and is now wearing her down. It just needs the teachers to have a quiet word with these girls (hopefully) once they realise DD is going to tell you and you will complain they will hopefully stop - if not then you will have more to go back to the school with. Fingers crossed.

Hi,

DD spoke to the year 7 leader a couple of weeks after the falling out and because of the girls behaviour in those two weeks (my advice). DD said she asked the teacher what she should do.

Teacher asked DD if she wanted to be friends with them again. DD said she didnt want to be mean but she now had new friends so didnt want to but just wanted them to leave her alone. DD told the teacher that friends had told her what the three girls had been saying to them about her.

Teacher told DD unless she hears herself from the girls mouths, not to believe what she is being told from others about what the girls are saying. She also said that DD probably misinterpreting the girls behaviour. She told DD to stay out of their way.

As you can see that was a waste of DD's time.

That wasn't particularly helpful of the teacher. I remember that kind of thing well from high school.

For now I would suggest your daughter ignores them,as much as she can and see how things go (for a short time,a week or two). If they are still behaving in the same way I would suggest you speak to their head of year.

I'm glad to read she has made other friends and isn't pining for those other not very nice girls. Encourage her to focus on her new friends. Bullies do hate being ignored.