to take my DD to the doctors/HV

[WorriedMumNeedsHelp]

I have name changed.

Around 8 weeks a go my DD aged 3 managed to lock herself with the key into my walk in wardrobe.

Since then she is afraid of the dark, will not stay in her bedroom on her own and crys until she comes into my bed. When i get her she is literally shaking.

What are you expecting the GP/HV to do?

She's clearly had a fright. It will pass. You need to acknowledge her fears and help her see they are groundless. Don't bring it up unless she does.

I don't think a doc could do much tbh.

I don't think a GP would necessarily be able to help, but if you're really worried and don't know how to tackle it yourself (to be fair, I wouldn't either) a child therapist might be able to help. Better able to help than a GP, anyway.

They could probably refer her to a counsellor/ child psychologist. If her reaction happens every night and has been going on for 2 months it may help to see a professional who is an expert in helping young children with phobias (which it sounds like this could be).

I am not sure tbh.

I am just very worried about her, I am very tired at the moment and i am not thinking straight.

I don't think a GP could do much at this stage. It is pretty normal for children to be afraid of the dark really.

I assume you have things like a night light for her?

Has she got a nightlight? I also can't see what a dr/HV could do .

And have you tried reading stories like "The Owl who was afraid of the dark?"

Read them during the day and talk about how the owl was feeling and try to get her to talk that way

not tried books like that, but could go to the library tomorrow to get some. I have got her a nightlight.

Depends on your GP/HV really.

I know ours would take it seriously and discuss methods of dealing with it (he's got 4 dc and knows that sort of thing).

If they're just going to go "one of those things, will grow out of it", it isn't much point.

I would move her bed (or the mattress) into your room, or get her a night light that stays on. Perhaps a special toy that "watches over her" and let her feel that she's welcome there as long as she needs to be.

Poor wee thing. 8 weeks is a long time. (I am still a bit claustrophobic after being shut inside a box-seat at a similar age!)

Do you know how long she was in the wardrobe? Did you talk with her about how she felt scared because she was locked in? Could you gradually work up to getting her used to seeing you go into the wardrobe and joining you when she feels like it?

Presumably when she is in your bed she is not afraid of the dark. It's bedtime and it's supposed to be dark so we can go to sleep.

But by all means speak to the HV - YANBU.

What about one of those toys that has a light in them ,bedroom door open and hall light on . Do you think it's possible that it started off as fear and is now habit?

she was locked in for about 5 minutes, DH had to break the door down.

The toy sounds a good idea. I will get her one of them and some books.

I would expect a GP could refer to appropriate department if you can get them to understand it is affecting normal life and causing her distress.

It's sounds more serious than just children's normal fear. I remember DD after I tried to bath her with v sore bottom- she was hysterical at bathtimes for a couple of weeks. If you don't make a big deal it might pass. Would she settle for a lamp on that you could then phase out over time?

Worth a try, GP or health visitor can refer to CAMHS (child and adolescent mental health) at the right level. They're honestly not scary (i'm working there at the moment!) but the sooner you deal with it the easier it wil be sorted, may well only take a few sessions to come up with a practical plan that helps you help her.

If you're worried and it's tiring you both out I think you should go to Dr. The worst they can do is tell you not to worry or they might be able to refer you to a counselor or play therapist who could help. If it was me I would go without my dd, though, as it would stress her out more if she knew I was worried.

In meantime I second talking about it, nightlight s (can she have a torch or lamp she cAn control herself?) And reassuring her you are available in night. Maybe get baby monitor out again so you can hear her early or sleep in her room for a bit so she feels more comfortable there. (Aware you have probably tried all of this!)

Good luck

thankyou all.

will go to the HV as seeing her is a walk in clinic where a doctor appoinment can take up to 3 weeks