WIBU to tell DD's father to sling his hook if he comes to her party tomorrow?

[neuroticmumof3]

It's DD's party tomorrow, about 25 children coming so loads to organise. Her father, ExP, has had nothing to do with the party arrangements/planning or costs whatsoever. I have posted previously about what a dick he was on her birthday (turned up with no present or card).

He was due to come here at 9am today. He always visits on a Saturday so no deviation from routine there. I told him I really needed him to come this week because I've got all the party food shopping to do and lots to sort out.

Surprise, surprise, he didn't turn up this morning and has turned his mobile off. Luckily DD hasn't mentioned or been upset by his absence. He does have past form for not turning up when expected, sometimes for as long as 3-4 weeks. Never an explanation/apology afterwards.

Needless to say I am fuming! I'm more pissed off on DD's behalf than mine. Thankfully my older DS's came to the rescue and looked after DD quite a bit while I've been running around like a headless chicken.

I don't know whether or not he'll turn up for her party tomorrow. My inclination is to tell him to fuck off to the far side of fuck etc but should I be welcoming and pleasant for DD's sake?

What should I do oh wise ones?

be polite for dds sake

but then you know that

What a cock of a man.

He doesn't deserve it but for your daughter's sake I think you should be civil to him if he turns up.

It's tempting to tell the fucking git to fuck off but please don't. It wont do anyone any good. You need to be civil, especially as it's your child's birthday party. You dont want her remembering years from now solely because you and her dad had a huge massive barney in front of all her classmates and possibly their parents.

What DesperatelySeeking said ^
Bite your tongue and fell superior to him if he shows. He might be a git and a twat, but he is her father and a fight does nobody any good
Just sit and quietly imagine several amusing things that might befall him, like his knackers trapped in a bear trap while mice nibble on them or falling headfirst into one of the ever so fragrant latrine pits on the last day at Glastonbury and other suck things...

feel not fell!

Be polite, for DD's sake. It's her day.

But make sure you give him a binbag and a dustpan & brush at the end of the party - the twat can help you clear up.

You have to put your DD first and keep your feeling to yourself. Give him jobs to do and keep him busy.

I'll just grit my teeth and get on with it if he shows up. I get so angry because he doesn't care enough about her to invest some time, energy, thought etc into her 5th birthday. Makes me v v stabby. I just want him to be a decent dad to her.