AIBU to feel sad and cheesed off?

[beachresort]

It's a friend's 40th birthday party tonight. It's been on our calender for weeks. We're not best friends with them, but we enjoy their company and they've always been there for us.

So I sorted out a babysitter, bought our friend a present and have decided what to wear.

DH has been working away since Tuesday, but he has been aware of this party and asked about it at the start of the week regarding whether we had a babysitter etc.

But, somewhere between Tuesday and 5.00pm this evening DH has completely forgotten about this party. He's had a really busy week working away, got back last night really shattered, and has spent today heavily involved in a work project.

I've just spoken to him, and he says he will be tied up until later tonight, and that he completely forgot about this party. He will try and be as fast as he can - but basically, I'm to go to the party on my own, and he will try and join me there. But it could be 8.30pm or it could be 10.00pm.

I feel so annoyed and fed up. I wasn't really looking forward to the party, because DH and I wouldn't have known many people there except our friend. And it's going to be even harder, being there on my own waiting for him to turn up (if he does).

But, I feel really let down and annoyed with DH. I'm annoyed that he's so forgetful, and because he's really busy and tied up and stressed the rest of the world can go and sod off.

And I feel bad that we're letting our friends down.

Yanbu to be annoyed at your dh but go without him and enjoy yourself!

Go without him and have fun. He's not out drinking or playing sports. It's annoying, but not the end of the world.

I'm really quite self confident, but I really will only know my friend there and his wife, no one else. Everyone else will be couples, pretty much or people I have never met.

It's just annoying because the party starts at 8pm. And, I don't know what to do. I was planning on just showing my face, coming back at 9pm, and then driving the sitter home even though it would mean keeping my DCs up late because they'd have to come in the car with me.

But DH is now saying he'll be as fast as he can, but he can't give me a definite time when he'll be back. But I can't just hang around too long at the party waiting for him, because if he doesn't show up then I will need to wake our DCs and drive our sitter home, and I don't think that's very fair to them?

This is just so typical of him. Everything confused and disorganised and left until the last minute. He's been away all week and my life has been so much more peaceful and calm. Wanker

beachresort, your dh sounds like mine. It's so frustrating and disappointing. No solutions - just sympathy and :)

Thank you FiestyLass. Sorry you have the same sort of DH. Does he do this sort of thing often?

I would love that but if I go to this party I can't even have a drink to cheer myself up because I will have to drive the sitter home.

I'm sure I do love my DH but he does this sort of stunt time and again. You know how King Midas touched everything and it turned to gold? Well everything DH touches to confusion and complication.

You can give him the simplest task and he'll manage to cock it up by over complicating it, and getting everything wrapped around his neck

He's just phoned to say he'll be home at 9pm, just needs to jump in shower and we'll be at the party by 9.20pm. But I feel stressed and drained already.

dh does it regularly but not every time we make plans. Hence I get lulled into a false sense of security. Then I feel like an idiot when I make plans relying on him and he lets me down again.

For example, we were supposed to be having a family day today for ds' birthday. (His actual birthday was during the week and we celebrated with party for extended family, etc). Dh had to go to emergency dentist this morning which was fine and unavoidable. However then he didn't call till after midday, and didn't come back till late afternoon. Luckily I hadn't told ds of our plans so he wasn't disappointed.

The last time we were supposed to be going away for the weekend, dh called at about 10am to say he wouldn't make the weekend away at all then he called at lunchtime to say he'd be back by 3pm, then didn't actually come back till nearly 7pm. It's always work related which makes it more difficult because it seems churlish to complain but it would be good if we could take priority on occasion. . .

Hopefully you both made the party and had a nice time with lots of if dh can drive :)

You are 'quite confident' but you cant go to a party alone? For one or 2 hours till your dh comes?

Tell him that you will have fun flirting