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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be annoyed by grown adults who say they can't cook?

214 replies

Mintyy · 18/11/2012 14:47

I don't think I am.

It just makes me think that the person saying as much is a little bit useless.

OP posts:
sarahseashell · 18/11/2012 16:45

squoosh they buy it because it tastes better than their own probably and they don't have time to make it or don't want to- nowt wrong with that surely. Much like we don't have to wash everything buy hand/darn socks etc. People don't all have the time or inclination to spend ages chopping up ingredients for a sauce which if they were like me they'd probably burn or it would just somehow taste shit Smile

Mrsjay · 18/11/2012 16:47

I but bechamel sauce

Mrsjay · 18/11/2012 16:48

buy

squoosh · 18/11/2012 16:48

But my point about carbonara sauce us that there isn't any chopping, it's literally stirring some egg and parmesan together with some salt and pepper.

nulgirl · 18/11/2012 16:50

I can't cook - can reheat and make simple thing like baked potatoes, beans on toast. I have never learnt and to be honest it doesn't bother me. My dh is a chef and is very good at what he does. He does all the cooking, housework and DIY. I take the lead with the kids and wash all the clothes. I know I've got the easier deal but am not going to protest. We both work fulltime and my life is too busy to learn new skills that I don't enjoy.

Couldn't care less if anyone judges me.

nulgirl · 18/11/2012 16:50

I can't cook - can reheat and make simple thing like baked potatoes, beans on toast. I have never learnt and to be honest it doesn't bother me. My dh is a chef and is very good at what he does. He does all the cooking, housework and DIY. I take the lead with the kids and wash all the clothes. I know I've got the easier deal but am not going to protest. We both work fulltime and my life is too busy to learn new skills that I don't enjoy.

Couldn't care less if anyone judges me.

squoosh · 18/11/2012 16:50

It doesn't bother me, it just perplexes me.

Mrsjay · 18/11/2012 16:50

last time i made cabronara I had cheesey scrambled egg

squoosh · 18/11/2012 16:53

Nothing wrong with a bit of texture MrsJay! Grin

Mrsjay · 18/11/2012 16:54

Nothing wrong with a bit of texture MrsJay!

I was looking for a bit of toast to go with it Grin

fedupoftheworrying · 18/11/2012 16:59

I can't cook - in fact, part of the reason I get DLA is because I cannot cook safely Blush; I have burnt/cut myself, set my hair on fire, set my clothing on fire and left the cooker on enough times to know that cooking and me really don't mix Grin.

Can reasonably do some stuff under supervision but generally stick to sandwiches/microwave.. It isn't a completely necessary life skill, it's handy but you can live on cold stuff/soup!

And it certainly does not make me useless. I have other skills and aptitudes that make me "useful" , if I say so myself!

RooneyMara · 18/11/2012 17:00

Minty I don't think that's very fair tbh.

I'm a rubbish cook, really rubbish, I used to make proper iced cakes when I was about 12, really into it, and helped with cooking and so on at home, but somewhere along the line I developed a mental block, and just lost the knack.

I think it's something you can 'do' or you can have a real feel for. Or you cannot do it to save your life. Especially tryingto use a recipe - that makes my head explode, and you never have everything you need, or something doesn't make sense, or you can read the words but the meaning is lost on you (like how do you blanch something, how fine do you chop something, etc etc)

It is an ART if you like

I can paint portraits, I can tile a bathroom by myself and do a fucking good job of it...I can also drive, ride motorcycles, lay a floor, build flat pack furniture really well.

I'm certainly not 'useless'. And I wish I could cook, but it's just something I'm crap at for whatever reason, AND I don't enjoy trying.

So yes, YABU with big old knobs on Smile

fedupoftheworrying · 18/11/2012 17:01

And I have been taught, did home ec for years and my parents are both fully trained head chefs. Even had OT round to the house to try and teach me how to cook - but still can't get to a decent enough level!

RooneyMara · 18/11/2012 17:05

'But my point about carbonara sauce us that there isn't any chopping, it's literally stirring some egg and parmesan together with some salt and pepper. '

Just a good example there (if you don't mind, Squoosh!)...'some' means how much? Is my egg large or medium, if it's medium, do I need two? What's it supposed to look like when it's cooking?

and how much salt and pepper?

I'm guessing a lot of you would know these things purely by experience and instinct. And a lot of us wouldn't have a clue. Like, you might not know how much grout is about right, where to put the first tiles, which way up to put the bookcase you're building so it goes together best....Oh yes it came with instructions but reading and understanding are two different things.

KatyPeril · 18/11/2012 17:09

YABU. And a bit of a twat. Hope that helps.

squoosh · 18/11/2012 17:16

Carbonara sauce is such a magical thing that it can take as much parmesan cheese as my greed decides to throw at it. And you don't cook it, you just coat the cooked pasta in it off the heat (to avoid scrambled egg scenarios). I don't go in for measuring and weighing (unless I'm baking), you don't really need to to with savoury dishes.

I'm no amazing cook by the way. I wish I was one of those people who can look inside the cupboard and come up with 20 recipes off the bat.

AmandaCooper · 18/11/2012 17:26

Cooking requires good organisational skills, patience, a degree of tolerance for working under pressure, coordination and attention to detail. For people with that skill set, it can be straightforward, even pleasurable. If you're not strong in one of those areas, you can work harder at it to compensate, but it's not going to be as pleasurable, and the results may not be as consistent or satisfying. It also helps to have a nice kitchen, good quality pans and implements, money for ingredients and plenty of time.

Tee2072 · 18/11/2012 17:28

"Cooking requires good organisational skills, patience, a degree of tolerance for working under pressure, coordination and attention to detail. "

Nah. Cooking requires 5 minutes, some food and a stove. Unless you are working in a pro kitchen. Then you need all of the above.

NoraGainesborough · 18/11/2012 17:29

I can cook but I don't.

AmandaCooper · 18/11/2012 17:29

Cooking as opposed to "preparing meals" as distinguished above.

MsIngaFewmarbles · 18/11/2012 17:37

I love to cook and bake and do most meals from scratch. DH can reheat and do pasta and jarred sauce meals etc. He has tried many times but it just defeats him. He will and does clean and tidy though which I don't :)

ZZZenAgain · 18/11/2012 17:45

I think yabu, too much fuss is made of cooking IMO and there is not really much point in it. You can eat healthy food without cooking at all or hardly at all. I think too many people make a real fetish out of it and plainer and less cooked food would be better all round.

As you can tell, I was not born to live in France!

IfNotNowThenWhen · 18/11/2012 17:48

Since when does something have to directly affect you to be annoying??
LOADS of things annoy me about people which don't actually affect MY life. Same as most people.

OP, I am going to say YANBU, because I have been watching Loose Women (I was ill!) and they go on and on, with evident pride, about how they can't cook at all.
They are in their 50's! I have been shouting "fucking learn then" at the telly.
I am not talking about fancy shmancy stuff, but surely every adult should be able to take some meat, and some veg, and fashion a stew or something.
Its not hard!
What if all you non-cookers went to live in a country which only sold foodstuff in their basic state. Would you starve because there are no M and S ready meals?
I won't accept "I can't cook" from a grown man, so I don't see why grown women should be any different.

sarahseashell · 18/11/2012 17:56

'fashion a stew' Hmm

It is hard for people who find it hard. If I went to live in that hypothetical country (which I wouldn't) I'd eat toast Wink or do they not even have bread there ?

AmandaCooper · 18/11/2012 17:57

What happens if you "don't accept" it? Anything we should be concerned about?