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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Children outside in pram?

29 replies

NotYouNaanBread · 18/11/2012 11:59

I was just verbally assaulted in a cafe for putting the double stroller outside (I.e. wheeled it straight through cafe out into their courtyard area) because I wanted my 2 dd's to finish their naps - both children are wrapped up to the gills - jackets, cardigans, woolly tights/leggings & are zipped into their phil & ted's cocoons to the neck. One is wearing a hood, the other has a towel covering most of her head because I didn't want to wake her to pull up hood. I then put my puffa jacket over the whole thing. It's about 4 degrees here, sunny & the courtyard is sheltered. I put them outside because I reckoned they'd melt -or worse - wake up (!) - in the hot cafe. I had walked about 30 mins with them to get there. We don't have a car.

The woman who spoke to me told me that there must be something wrong with me and that she should call social services.

OP posts:
thumper1806 · 18/11/2012 12:03

Tell her to fuck off.

I'm sure they are perfectly fine. What does she think eskimos do?

Nancy66 · 18/11/2012 12:03

she's a stupid twat.

Absolutely nothing wrong with what you did. They were safe, warm and in the fresh air.

NotYouNaanBread · 18/11/2012 12:03

Sorry about the long paragraph there - on iPhone & couldn't scroll up to edit!

I'm always running around after dd's putting extra layers on them - I'm not blasé about the cold at all, but we have always put them outside for naps when the fall asleep in the buggy, regardless of weather (we're in England so never below freezing during the day!).

If in doubt I put an extra blanket over the sleeping child (hence jacket over them today) but those cocoons are serious stuff & it never struck me that DH & I might be alone in thinking they'd be cosy?

OP posts:
scentednappyhag · 18/11/2012 12:03

Were you sitting outside with them?

FlaminNoraImPregnantPanda · 18/11/2012 12:04

She should call social services. They have a hard job and coud do with a good laugh. I live in Sweden where babies are normally put outside to sleep. 4C is positively tropical by comparison.

OpheliaPayneAgain · 18/11/2012 12:06

People are loons. Sorry but they are. I was once bollocked by an old dear (yes, agism!) for not having sun bloack and brolly at 7am. Ok, right.

I have to ask, is it not normal to park your baby outside these days, usually at home, for a good old bit of fresh air?

NotYouNaanBread · 18/11/2012 12:07

Scented - no, I had put my jacket over them & decided to sit inside on the other side of the glass, about a metre away from them. Courtyard otherwise empty, so I hadn't just parked them on the street outside a cafe & disappeared off in.

The woman who had a go at me was at the next table also beside the window & could clearly how wrapped up they were.

OP posts:
whoopwhoopbib · 18/11/2012 12:08

Yanbu, I mentioned to a friend that I occasionally leave DD sleeping in her pushchair in our garden and she told me that 'they' don't recommend doing that anymore.

I honestly don't see any difference between what you or I do compared to taking them for an hour+ walk, they are still outside, safe and visible.

ChippingInLovesAutumn · 18/11/2012 12:08

She's barking. Ignore the daft bat.

I take it you didn't read the 'Babies sleeping outside' thread a week or two ago :( Loads of MNers are still putting their babies outside for naps - shock, at home too?! I bet she'd die of shock if she knew that!!

Much better for them to be wrapped up outside than awake overheated inside.

PickledFanjoCat · 18/11/2012 12:09

She is a total loon. Laugh at her and ignore!

NotYouNaanBread · 18/11/2012 12:14

Thank you very much, all! I was furious at first & stormed out of cafe in righteous rage having told her (in what I hope was a lofty & dignified manner!) to mind her own business & not lecture perfect strangers etc., but having sat down in another cafe (cold as the grave inside, brought pram in with me) I started to doubt myself.

OP posts:
vamosbebe · 18/11/2012 12:17

An old bat lady told me not to let DS cruise around at 8 months because his bones weren't strong enough. What was I supposed to do, bind him into his pushchair? Hold onto him on my lap with him wiggling like a fish and screaming like a banshee?! If his little legs couldn't hold him up, he wouldn't be cruising; I'm sure he'd let everyone know he was in pain/uncomfortable.

I just smiled sweetly and said, 'well, if he's happy, I'm happy' and we toddled off.

I'm sure if your DC were cold, they'd have let you know! As it was I think they sounded very well-wrapped and obviously quite content asleep outside.

I hate nosey opinionated people like that. SOD OFF!

Mrsjay · 18/11/2012 12:23

In the olden days Grin babies were put outside in their prams I did with dd1 and then 5 years later with dd2 it was suddenly frowned upon and nobody did it, my aunt used to put all her babies outside all day almost , anyway this woman was a nosey bint who should mind her own phone social services pfft people like her have no clue what true neglect it imo,

CatsRule · 18/11/2012 12:25

I wonder if she would be so brave as to voice her opinion to someone who truly was doing something abusive?!

Imagine wanting your child not to melt and get a little vitamin d!

Phil and Teds are outdoor buggies andbthe cocoons are toasty. I wrap ds up in a snowsuit, hat, footmuff and blanket amd outside he gets toasty and sometimes sweaty...I need to strip him indoors (never seen an opportunity to safely leave him out) otherwise he would really overheat.

Ignore her...she is a silly woman!!

insancerre · 18/11/2012 12:27

Mrsjay, in the outstanding nursery where i work, the babies go outside to sleep in the prams most days
I also used to put DS outside when he was a baby (1989) but not with DD, because as you say, attitudes changed- I think it was couple of high profile baby abduction cases
OP, YANBU

Mrsjay · 18/11/2012 12:52

Mrsjay, in the outstanding nursery where i work, the babies go outside to sleep in the prams most days

thats great that they go outside it really doesn't happen much i don't think and some people do get shocked by it , dd1 was born in 93 and it wasn't uncommon to see prams with babies in them outside shops ,

DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 18/11/2012 13:27

YANBU that woman is a loony.

I used to roll my eyes heavenward when my gran raved about leaving babies in the fresh air to help them sleep better. I then tried it. And it worked. DS especially sleeps for longer. Even in the cold when he is all wrapped up he's happy enough to snooze. So much so I'm thinking of getting him a tent so he can kip out in the garden at night as well Grin

I hate this whole "I don't agree with your parenting so I'm going to call SS on you!" Hmm it's a horrible thing to threaten anyone with and so petty and pathetic.

WelshMaenad · 18/11/2012 13:34

If they were feeling the cold they wouldn't stay asleep.

Did she object to them being pushed around, asleep, for 30 minutes outside, or is it different of the pram is in motion?

What a twat. Her, not you.

Chopchopbusybusy · 18/11/2012 13:42

My MIL is a huge fan of babies put in the garden for a snooze. She swears her three slept like logs and she never heard them cry. They lived on an RAF base and she put their prams in the garden next to the runway. I'm sure the aircraft drowned out their screams ;)

TwitchyTail · 18/11/2012 13:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

griphook · 18/11/2012 13:45

I'd be more worried they would over heat tbh.

Hey you can't win. Smile

Anonymumous · 18/11/2012 13:49

Gosh, I'd better start keeping an eye open for Social Services. Confused If my baby has fallen asleep in the pram on the school run, I leave her in her porch in the pram for hours sometimes when we get home (with the front door open so I can keep an eye on her). It might be the only chance I get to have breakfast without interruptions!

I think I might not have been as polite to this woman as you were.

Hopeforever · 18/11/2012 13:50

DH was left in the pram in the garden as a baby while his parents went to a neighbours party. Now that might be something SS would have acted on, but OP what you did was fine.

In fact far safer than those of us who have left sleeping toddlers in cars on the drive way

shockers · 18/11/2012 13:52

What an awful thing to say, she was obviously a bit unhinged. Sorry she spoiled your outing.

Good job she wasn't around when I left DS1 in his pram outside the butcher's and then walked home without him. I only realised after I'd sat down for a cuppa that there was something missing. In my defence, the shop was round the corner from my house, it was 25 years ago, so leaving babies outside shops in big prams was quite normal... and I was very tired.

PolkadotCircus · 18/11/2012 13:59

I put my 3 out every day.

My mum had me in Scotland(it gets v cold up there) and did the same(in the 60s all kids were put outside).

We are all glowing with health.

There was some guy on JV only last week saying how we need outdoor air and that stale indoors air isn't good for us.

She was obviously barking.