To think it's not at all unreasonable to want to know where my toddler is overnight?

[WhenSantaGotStuckUpACunnyFunt]

MIL has 17mo DD overnight once a month, she stayed over last night. MIL rings up at 7ish this morning and says they're just about to set off and they'll be back in about 45 mins because the roads could be icy so she'll drive extra carefully. DP doesn't think this odd at all, yet I'm sat there thinking 'WTF? MIL only lives 5 minutes away!' So I ask DP why it's going to take that long and he says
'Oh they're at '
Me 'What, this early?'
DP 'No they slept out there last night because B&SIL wanted to go out so mums baby sitting'

He knew all along that DD was going to be over half an hour away and I'm astounded that he didn't think it important enough to tell me where she was going to be!

I'm pissed off with him and he just doesn't see it as a big deal!

Sorry if it doesn't make much sense, I'm annoyed and walking the dog

I can't see the problem as long as you know who she is with i.e the MIL . If you trust her enough to let her have your DD overnight then surely you should just let her get on with it . That's why my DCs never stayed overnight at my PILs , I didn't trust them .

Depends if he thought you would object to the plan, and didn't tell you for that reason, or if he didn't think to tell you cause he didn't think it was important.

Since you seem to like your BIL and trust your MIL, I don't think it is worth getting het up about.

precious imo.

Id prefer to know, but the most important thing was who was looking after him, not what building. If she'd left him with your BIL without you knowing, then yeah, id be annoyed, but not for where he kipped

I would want to know before, so I could plan my child free evening.

When the kids stay out overnight I don't drink, just incase they needed picking up like not settling and crying or they feel unwell ect.

5 minutes around the corner I can walk there, so I may have a little drink.

Yabu. He didn't hide it from you on purpose. Must tell him you would prefer to know in future and leave it there.

Don't get the outrage myself.

yanbu.