To want to punch every single noisy opened mouth eater I come across?

[twinkletoescare]

Ok maybe not punch BUT DEFO tell them how rude,bad mannered and annoying to anyone within a six mile radius it is?
Kids or elderly I don't care....it's RUDE.

Oh sorry...elderly is disabled?

you said people with false teeth in your post above mine twinkle, or did you mean people in their 30s with false teeth?

I have two false teeth from having them knocked out in an accident as a child, my friend is 26 and has a full set of false teeth due to poor dental hygiene from her foster carers.

Don't put your own hang up son me because I'm not interested.

False teeth can impair your ability to eat Owl, Twinkle didn't mention age, you got there yourself. People have false teeth for lots of reasons.

And people who answer the phone by clearing their throat? BATTER THEM!!!!!

she said elderly in her first post and my own hang ups? get a grip :o

dublinmammy it's worse when they are form a call centre and do that!

Tremolo and people who mix up ice cream until it's slimy?

Owl I believe this is a light hearted thread. OP shame on you for not having made that clear....

wasn't this a light hearted joke thread, who called the fun police?

Being elderly doesn't mean you can't eat nicely. My aunt is in her 80's and due to being a perfectly able adult she can eat at table nicely thank you.

The point was that being elderly or a child doesn't excuse bad table manners. The false teeth reference was OP pointing out that sometimes there are valid reasons for not eating nicely and of course this thread wasn't aimed at them.

What about people who eat noisily down the phone Twinkle and Dublin?!?!

banging of cutlery against teeth arrrggggghhh

Eating noisily down the phone whilst clearing throat and crinkling the wrapper? I may have a stroke soon....... Just from pure rage.

My ds has SN and does this regularly, he also gets reminded every time to close his mouth, but I forgive him he just forgets

I won't punch him either

Just a gentle reminder

oh god. My mother eats with her mouth open so you can see all the food being chomped around. She sucks at the same time as chewing and its just fucking disgusting. Makes me sick just thinking about it.

there is just NO NEED. NO fucking NEED. We've a labrador who eats nicer than her.

jjuice I must remember to add a little (this is a joke thread) in my next post just so everyone can be clear

cortana I had a very good friend who used to chomp down the phone but would insist on talking/chomping for hours on end, god I'm shuddering just thinking of it!

Even my own eating, if I have a cold and can't eat with my mouth closed, drives me insanely mad, so yadnbu. I stopped eating with some family members and sometimes can't face dinner at the family table just because of the gross eating habits of my own kids/grandfather. It is probably my problem, not theirs, but I hate it. I have looked at my husband when he is eating noisily and had murderous thoughts...

I really don't think I need to be patronised

Fair enough if it was meant to be lighthearted but I still find it offensive

Arf Tired, always nice to hear about people not beating their kids. Although the wink after "gentle reminder" did make me wonder what you did!

flyingspaghetti wow you've got it bad!

I wasn't patronising you. You made a comment about OP's posts, I had read them in a different way (and I suspect in the way OP intended) and I pointed that out.

Don't worry Dublin, I had a mini stroke once (tempted to make Ex-DP joke but I'll leave it). Although I should point out I also wasn't making fun, I know if you're at risk of a stroke salt isn't really what you need, however I don't think smelling salts fall under the same.

totally agree.

Am stalling in inviting MIL who eats with her mouth open for Christmas. DH and I are already thinking up 'emergencies upstairs'