I Really do want to throttle my ex m-in-law

[mof3under3]

4 weeks ago my 3 sons & me went to a farm & ended up bringing home 3 beautiful kittens (went 4 1, but all 3 picked different ones & who did i say no to?!) Anyway due to half term MiL has had 1 son for 2 days each at hers so she hasnt been to mine she covers every alternate sat, she rings & tells me last thur night "she can no longer come to mine as she is allergic to cats (dogs shes fine with)but if it helps can have 1 son on sat at hers" i wanted to say what do u want me to do with other 2, let kittens mind them!! I offered to put them in outside shed for day shes here but NO they must go. Ive spent the last 4 weeks teaching my boys how to care & love & play with them, which they now do & not only do i feel its an important lesson its rewarding them & they are more compasionate for it. Ive told my boys they have to go & now they hate mummy & theres tears. Im so angry im being held to ransome & i really am going to burst

I've just visited a (cleaning mad) cat owner's house and despite taking anti histamines in advance, it still made me unwell.

OP you are unreasonable to be so angry at exMIL for your lack of thought/planning.

well, you have two choices. Rehome the kittens as ordered, so your ex mother in law can continue to come round and babysit for you. Or find someone else to come and babysit. Sitters is an organisation that provides babysitters.
Or advertise for someone. Or ask friends if they have a teenager who'd be interested in earning some money.

Haha are you for real!

YABVU

She looks after your kids? Yes, they are her grandchildren but they are NOT her responsibility!!

I'm really allergic and not even taking anti histamines work, maybe slows it down and the reaction isn't so severe but still hell.

I get very very pissed off with folk who don't understand and think 'putting them out' works when it come round. We have several family members with cats and we don't visit full stop.

Oh and don't fecking drown them, get a grip!!

Agree with Cabrinha. If you are struggling to make ends meet then why the hell take on the cost of 3 kittens (food, medical, insurance etc) ?!

To be cometely blunt this if totally your own fault. You should have checked your MIL was ok with this before you got them then you wouldn't have to let your sons down.

thank you for making me laugh, yes a mess of my making but im sorting it my kittens will be rehomed into loving homes b4 mil comes back.

You know you really should have thought this through before you even considered getting one cat?

I hear stories about pets having to be put down if they can't be rehomed, and it always makes me wonder if people are really stupid enough to let this happen. But I suppose you have shown that I can wonder no more.

Making you laugh? You talk about someone drowing kittens and you throttling people, and then find something to laugh about? Unbelievable. Freak.

You sound a bit of an irresponsible fool to be honest.

If you work so much, and are so skint, why was it ever going to be a good idea to get 3 kittens???

I have always wondered what sort of person would just buy animals on a whim and then find out that they didn't fit into their lives.

And everything else outraged said.

By her some piriton and tell her to take it.

Do not re-home the kittens. You made a commitment when you took them.

So because of your ill thought out plans and inability to say no to your kids you are going to dump those poor kittens onto an already struggling charity? Or are you going to sell them? Or pass them onto friends?

How would you have afforded 3 lots of injectons, neutering, insurance, food, litter etc if you can't afford childcare?

Its not your exMILs fault for being allergic, its your fault for being selfish and irresponsible. They are living creatures not inanimate objects to be passed around from pillar to post

She is allergic to cats. Why can't your children go to her house. I think you should try to re-home these kittens or give them to a rescue centre. It doesn't sound as if you have thought through the responsibilities of having and caring for pets.

So for the sake of one day a fortnight you are going to get rid of three kittens and break your little boys hearts now they have just grown attached to them.

Wow

you tried.
it didn't work out.
don't blame yourself - i don't think you sound like an 'irresponsible fool'.
make sure the boys know the truth of the situation - gran can't help being allergic and you really need the childcare...

I get the impression u weren't paying for insurances or vaccinations or anything. Were u going to use blue cross? U really didn't think this thru. Why didn't u check with mil first? Would that have been so hard? "Thinking of getting kids a pet! Cat probs...." "Argh don't I'm allergic!" Really short conversation eh?

Ur kids sound more responsible....

Glad you found this all funny. You are very selfish, immature and irresponsible.

What, lovely responsible homes like the one you were supposed to provide?

Poor animals.

I hope you ex MIL tells you where to go.

You sound ungrateful, thoughtless and entitled. Your poor boys. It seems it is okay to make everyone else miserable as long as you get what you want.

I honestly don't know if you are for real.

Your posting style is very immature, as are the things you say.

So first you get 3 cats because your children each pick different ones and you couldn't say no. Now your ExMIL tells you the cats have to go so you are getting rid of them. Are you incapable of making a decision yourself and not be dictated to by others. Doesn't sound like it.

I have horrible allergies to nearly all animals. It is a nightmare. But I wouldn't expect a family member to get rid of their animal to accommodate me when I am there. I take an antihistamine or don't stay long.

So what if her house is small, its 1 day a week. I'm sure she could manage for 1 day.

You do sound very entitled and your children threaten to be very spoiled... 'who do I say no to?' That just pisses me off to be honest... you say you won't take any of them unless they decide between them which kitten they have.

I also think that to want to throttle someone for something they can't do anything about is plain nasty. It's not like she's said she won't come to your house anymore because she doesn't like the wallpaper you've just chosen. I agree with the poster who said you should have checked with her first, and not assumed that she'd be happy to pick up responsibility for three kittens as well as three boys.

Dh can't spend more than 10 minutes is a house where cat live. Hr is very allergic. Tablets don't work.

It was about year after mums cat died before he could go in and have a coffee. Both his parents and mine visited us so we didn't have to go there as they both had cats.
His allergy got alot worse as he got older. Between 28-34 it went from mild to very severe.

As for the rest of it....well words fail me. Unbelievable how some adults act.

This is not the MIL's fault, at all. I am desperately allergic to cats (not dogs), anti-histamines don't work, if I had to spend a full day there I would be very ill and uncomfortable - and certainly not capable of looking after 3 DCs.

That said, I can't believe you're talking about drowning your kittens. Either the DCs go to MIL's house, or find alternative childcare. You've created this situation, manage it without taking life.

And I'm glad you find it funny

FFS, she is not thinking of drowning them.

I am very allergic to cats - my friend has a cat and I have to take piriton/asthma inhaler etc if I go her house. When I get home I shower and wash my hair. It's a terrible allergy to have.

This all sounds completely normal and not at all like an attempt to wind people up.