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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be irritated with a colleague at work

14 replies

Chocolatephiladelphia · 08/11/2012 18:11

Who just will not ask about your personal life.
Let me out this into context - my husband has had an interview which would see him get a large salary increase and promotion within the company, I was telling x all about it today and how stressed he has been, she just stared at me and started talking about her husband's work.
There have been so many scenarios like this, that x tries to go one better, whether it be with health, relatives, bereavement, a case of one upmanship but done in quite a nice way, she always has a better/worse story and will tell you it.

OP posts:
honeytea · 08/11/2012 18:16

I think you both need to do less chatting about your husband's work and more working, if you can't find a topic you enjoy talking about just stick to the weather.

Rugbycomet · 08/11/2012 18:17

She sounds insecure to me so hence the reason to go one better!! Sorry not sure what to say re advice.

TheRealAmyFarrahFowler · 08/11/2012 18:18

Bet she's been to Elevenerife Smile

Chocolatephiladelphia · 08/11/2012 18:20

Haha she has been there!

OP posts:
Whoknowswhocares · 08/11/2012 18:24

She doesn't sound like the sort I'd particularly like to be chatting with tbh. I find divulging personal info with random people at work a bit odd. Why do you want to discuss your OH job and stress levels with someone you don't appear to like?

BabsJansen · 08/11/2012 18:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MardyBra · 08/11/2012 18:31

Are you sure you weren't bragging?

bakerbakerfairycaker · 08/11/2012 18:43

I do that.

I have Aspergers.

MulledWineOnTheBusLady · 08/11/2012 18:48

I'm puzzled, what was she supposed to ask you? You told her a story, why shouldn't she tell you one?

It's not like she could say "Congratulations!", since he hasn't got the job yet.

kakapo · 08/11/2012 18:50

Maybe she is just trying to relate by telling you her experiences? I have caught myself doing this sort of thing sometimes - I wasn't wanting to brag at all, but in a sympathetic "I really do know you must be really stressed/tired" thing.

Chocolatephiladelphia · 08/11/2012 18:56

Yeah kakapo it may have been that.
She's a colleague who is also a friend, so if we have a few minutes during lunch we'll have a chat.
We do have a laugh together and she talks to me as a friend, I just find it a bit irritating that it can sometimes be all about her!

OP posts:
kakapo · 08/11/2012 19:00

Hmm, must bear that in mind and try not to do it to colleagues!!

bakerbakerfairycaker · 08/11/2012 22:03

Just realised half my post is missing.

I have Aspergers and do this alot. It just my way of trying to relate to a persons experience or feelings, by telling them I have been in a similasr situation. Sometimes my story wont seem to relate to the persons (although it will in my head) and they will think i've ignored them and moved on to my own topic.

before my dx I hated myself for it and tried my hardest not to do it but was then just classed as cold and uninterested.

Op, everyone is different, it might be a PITA, but just go with it and use someone else to talk to about things.

People like that are good to have a rant at when you would normally keep it to yourself, cos they wont remember what you said, to busy thining what to say back :)

LucieMay · 08/11/2012 23:26

So you talk about yourself all the time and she does the same? Sounds like you're made for each other!

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