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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Sons dads new girlfriend.

9 replies

linzi248485 · 07/11/2012 22:20

My sons dad went to prison for beating me up while I was pregnant with said son. He beat me for 2 years and we split up when my son was 3 months old. He was a heavy drinker and on drugs. Yes I know not a great person to have a child with but we learn from our mistakes. My son is now 9 and has not seen his dad since he was 3 months old. He came round on my sons third birthday out of his head but sent him away and have not seen him since. I have recently seen on Facebook (yes I know) that he is seeing someone with two young kids and it is really upsetting me me. I don't know what to do. So I suppose this is a case of WWYD. It really hurts that he is taking on 2 kids and I am worried that he is still the same abusive person.

OP posts:
mutny · 07/11/2012 22:24

I am sorry its so shit for you. it must really hurt.

Firstly I am not sure if you could/should do anything. His conviction was a long time ago and there is a (very slim) chance he has changed.

Secondly, step away from facebook. Why are you looking him up now?

Does he financially support your son.

AnyFucker · 07/11/2012 22:24

do nothing

nothing at all

WorraLiberty · 07/11/2012 22:25

It shouldn't 'hurt' you...you should be well rid of him.

Block him on Facebook and make sure to keep him blocked.

linzi248485 · 07/11/2012 22:29

It doesn't hurt me as such but my son has no pictures with his dad and seeing pictures of him with someone else's children is just hard to take. I want looking him up me and his new girlfriend have a lot of mutual friends so I clicked on and saw the pictures. Believe me I will not be looking again. We are well rid of him but you can't help your felling a can you. Just keep thinking of all the other side of my sons family that don't bother with him been with these children that are not even related to them.

OP posts:
linzi248485 · 07/11/2012 22:30

Want = wasn't

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 07/11/2012 22:34

I get what you're saying but there is a huge bright side that you're not looking on here.

You and your son don't have to put up with him or keep in contact with his family

Surely that's a cause for celebration?

mutny · 07/11/2012 22:34

Why do you want your son to have pictures with a knobber? That's what you need to think about.

You were looking him up. You didn't have to look at her profile or her pictures.

Unfortunately being able to help make a child does not make someone a decent person. Him and his family are shits.

Your son will grow up knowing you are the only parent he needs.

lovebunny · 07/11/2012 22:35

keep out of his way and out of his life. you don't want him. you aren't responsible for her children. let it go.

foreverondiet · 07/11/2012 22:47

I don't know, I would feel awful if anything happened to the children as I'd kept quiet. I would probably make anonymous call to SS - and leave it for them to check out situation and discuss with them what to do and whether they should warn his new partner.

Anonymous calls to SS are anonymous, def do not consider contacting the new girlfriend or anything like that.

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