AIBU to think these men shouldn't be paying CM ?

[GetAllTheThings]

Story in the Guardian about a gay man who donated sperm to a lesbian couple in a civil partnership resulting in two dc.

The couple split up and despite assurances he is then ordered by the CSA to pay child maintenance whilst the NRP from the relationship is not liable.

Law is now changed to prevent this, but this case happened before the law changed.

AIBU to think he shouldn't have to pay CM if that was the agreement he had with the couple, or should he continue to be held responsible for payments ?

Whoever the biological father is, they should be financially responsible for that child. This should be made clear to the donor at the time. Whether he is gay or not is irrelevant. If someone else wants to take over that financial responsibility that's fine but I guess you'd need a sound legal agreement for when things go wrong.

paradise if people donate eggs or sperm through a hefa regulated clinic etc they are NOT financially or legally responsible for the child in any way. its the doing it via unregulated means which has caused the issues.

the nrp in this case should be paying if they were a couple and chose to have children together. even more so if she is still having contact with the children.

paradise that isn't always what the 'parents' want though.

Tbh it sounds like they were quite happy for the man to act like a parent until they split. I can't believe the NRP.

BoneyBackJefferson, yeah to be honest, I think a lesbian couple should allow the biological father to be involved, I think it's what an adult would want. They'd love their bio mum and her partner but I think it's naive to think they'd reach adulthood and say 'phew thank goodness my biological father was prevented from having a relationship with me'.