To think if teenage girls from a private school can afford plane tickets ...

[Morgansports]

.... To visit the orphanage in Africa that they have been fundraising for, then the orphanage would be better served by just receiving the money they spent on their tickets. Seriously, what actual use to the orphanage is a group of hair-flicking, ugg boot wearing blondes???

And the bit that made me laugh is that other parents at the school were asked to help fundraise for the girls' trip.

AIBU?

What, so we shouldn't have rewarding relationships with anyone unless we can commit to a lifetime of seeing them regularly?

You are talking about young children probably with attachment disorders, emotional and behavioural problems being asked to form a bond with a constantly changing circus of 'fun' young people who are not equipped to care for them.

From the teens POV it's a fab life lesson that people 'over there' struggle for the most basic things in life. For these children...well I've no idea what they get out of it.

It's nothing to do with private education, these projects are unethical.

And you seriously think these children are left with zero stimulation until the teenagers turn up? Really?

about I had thre misfortune of going to see a Romanian orphanage some years ago...those DC had absolutely no stimulation. I have never see anyhting so sad (despite working in child protection in the UK for ten years) and don't expect to again.

I have drawn this thread to the attention of my Nigerian friend. She roared with laughter. As she put it "No Nigerians have flicky hair and even fewer are blonde. I think they'd go down a storm with the kids".

Not relevant but she made me laugh.

The teenagers are going to have the travel - they are not going to stay at home and send the money- if they are going to travel I think that it is good that they try and get involved in some way. It may well be a life changing experience and they could then spend a lifetime in a career that is going to make a difference. At the very least the youngsters are going to have the contact and know that someone cares. I give to Plan UK- the money goes to the community but I have the contact of one child. You could say that it would be more useful to simply donate the money but I think that it is lovely for the child to feel that someone is interested in the individual and they are not just an anonymous charity case. We correspond- I get a lot from them and feel it can only be good for us to learn things about each other. It seems very similar to me - both sides widen their horizons- which can only be good.

Oh well let's send the teens into orphanages where children are seriously neglected then, y'know read them a few stories...

The point is that we only seem to look at it as a 'life lesson' for our children - but you wonder what these children, who have no family caring for them, make of it. When they try to bond with someone who will just fly back to the UK after a week.

I have friends who are trained social workers who have worked with young children in Kenya and they had a fabulous time - but they also had the skills and training to make a difference.

Given a choice of one week or never I would go for one week- especially if I was the child.

Laqueen -

The UN, UNICEF, governments and major charities all agree that children are best cared for within their extended family, and where that is not possible in a foster family. Orphanages are a last resort, and where they are needed they should be professionally staffed.

But as UNICEF child protection head says ?Donors are attracted to orphanages because they appear to be a simple solution, you have a building, you house children in it, it is easy to count them. And they are easy to fundraise for. It is a model that has been used for a long time. But it is the wrong model."
(does funding orphanages create orphans)

Vulnerable children need working child protection systems, dedicated social workers and continuity of care. This can't be provided by teenage volunteers or even by qualified older volunteers who come and go.

Schools should stop allowing companies to come in peddling this Kate Middleton fantasy.

Everyone has to start somewhere- the experts were a waste of space when they started- luckily people gave them a chance.

So I've read this thread with real interest. There have been some powerful arguments, some petty and some plain rude or rediculous. I have found my opinion swaying from one side to the other throughout.

There are two points to address here.

1. The usefulness of these trips. I think they are actually beneficial to both the teenagers and the children they go to help. These children are generally not stupid and can understand the concept that someone has come to visit, play and help and then has to go home. I think the chance to free up qualified staff and do some maintainance does help and doesn't cause distress. Also these teenagers do sometimes carry on their communication and prove to be more and more helpful as time goes on. We all have to start somewhere.

1. The concept of fundraising to finance the trip rather than giving direct to a charity. The trips are going to run and people are going to go whether other people donate or not. Those that are asked are free to say no. Anyone who cares where their money goes will question the bag packers as to where their money is going. At the end of the day everyone has the choice to give or not.

Another point is that if the problem is that the teenagers come from affluent families the chances are that their local supermarket or other sources of raising money are affluent too and so can afford the extra. Again it will be their choice.

YANBU. This sort of thing is nothing short of obscene.

Raising money and donating it where it is needed? Fantastic. (Even better if you do enough research to find out where the money is actually going.)

Asking for money to purchase plane tickets so you can go and gawk at the orphanage which your funds have supposedly helped to support? Obscene. I can just imagine the smug satisfaction some people might achieve from this experience. "Oh, it was so horrible, those poor children living in such a horrid orphanage. But at least I know I did whatever I could to help them." Blech. And yes, I realize that not everyone would have this reaction. Maybe some of these schoolgirls will grow up to work for Medicins san frontieres or something. But the odds are against it.

Of course the money raised for the plane tickets could be put to better use. I can't imagine how anyone could argue otherwise.

And I'm a bit bemused to note that some posters have reserved their outrage solely for the characterization of the girls involved. As though describing them as "hair-flicking, ugg-wearing blondes" is really just the worst thing ever. Oh, the humanity.

Oops, that should be Medecins sans frontieres. Sorry for poor spelling (and I still can't figure out how to put in the accent).

La Queen - most children are cared for by their extended family. The few grand that it costs for a teenager to fly over and tell a few bed time stories for a couple of weeks would go much further paying for family income support, local social worker salaries, school fees etc... These are things that can make the difference between a child continuing to live with their family and being placed in an orphanage.

The few grand that it costs for a trained engineer to go over to fix the pipes in said orphanage (or whatever) would also go much further paying a local engineer or maintenance firm, as well as creating jobs.

You may, rightly say that these teens or professional adults would not donate thousands of pounds to pay for local people's salary, even if they knew that their two weeks cost might buy one year of a local social worker or maintenance engineer. Maybe you are right. But this is, at least in part because that is what they have learnt in school about the "right" way to be compassionate.

LaQueen you are so defensive, you are not even listening to the points being made

Exotic - seriously?- so would it be ok for vulnerable kids in Britain to be cared for by revolving parties of Chinese or Indian school kids on a field trip?

Of course not.

Why on earth should vulnerable children in poor countries be the ones to give our teens "a chance"?

Kitchenamdjumble.
Many people on this board will point out and complain about casual sexism, which I believe this op is. That isn't to say the substantive issue isn't hugely important. The two points are not mutually exclusive.

I don't see it as sexism. So I can't really comprehend the outrage.

I have only read small parts of thread so apologies if I have missed stuff.

1. Why is it okay for kids in third world to be taught by gap year students when our own DC are taught by professionals?

Answer: just guessing that if these kids in the African orphanage had trained professionals to teach them then that would be their first choice. The fact they accept gap year students as teachers/ helpers is presumably because it's the gap year students or nobody.

1. Would it be more acceptable to the OP, if it were BOYS or if they came from a STATE school, or if they had DARK hair? If not, then why put than in the post? If yes, then how?

Last point: it's very easy to knock other people taking positive action. It's much harder to do something that you feel is beneficial to society. OP, it's great if you feel able to fund raise without the handle of a trip/race whatever. Let us know how much you raise...