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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

the use of sexual language by teachers

66 replies

barcappen · 23/10/2012 20:38

My 7 year old daughter has recently started Stagecoach drama,singing and dance classes. 3 weeks ago she started holding her crotch and dancing whilst singing " I'm sexy and I know it ". She told me that this was played every week at her stagecoach dance class. I was shocked and complained to the principle that I considered this inappropiate . She said that they were having difficulty finding suitable music but I disagreed and said there were hundreds of funky dance tracks. The class is for 6 - 8 year olds. Anyway, she said she would deal with it and it is no longer played. But now just 2 weeks later they are learning a new song. It contains the word "sexy " in it. The words were printed out and given to the children - they started nudging each other because they are taught at school that sexy is a "swear " word. Some children put their hands up to tell the teacher but all she said was " put your hands down ". I just think it's unecessary and inappropiate for this age group. Am I being unreasonable ? Would love to hear your views !

OP posts:
lovebunny · 23/10/2012 21:10

no, it isn't just dancing. dancing is entirely different. this is sexualised, titillation, vulgar... there's no excuse for it. its a paedophile's fantasy! step aside from the mindset of just accepting 'that's how it is' and think of it from an outsider's point of view. why wouldn't people think your daughters were available, if that's how you train them to behave from babyhood?

lovebunny · 23/10/2012 21:11

ah, sorry catgirl1976, you must be right because sex was only invented in 2010.

PumpkInDublic · 23/10/2012 21:12

Crotch grabbing and singing about being sexy, aged 7. YANBU.

However YABU to send her back to any adult who thinks this in appropriate behavior for a child. Agree with LoveBunny, some of these dance classes, especially the "disco" style ones are awful.

Dominodonkey · 23/10/2012 21:13

lovebunny I have attended lots of dance classes, taught a few, and seen lots of dance shows. I have never seen one which is in anyway how you have described it. It sounds more like a burlesque or pole dancing class.

catgirl1976 · 23/10/2012 21:13

Right? I was asking you about the music, not making an assertion which could be right or wrong

WilsonFrickett · 23/10/2012 21:14

why wouldn't people think your daughters were available, if that's how you train them to behave from babyhood?

Did you mean that to sound so rapist-apologist or did it just come out that way?

therumoursaretrue · 23/10/2012 21:15

lovebunny I've been to about 10 different dance schools in my life, all different styles of dance and all perfectly respectable. So id say its pretty easy to find a respectable dance class. I think most reasonable adults would find calling a child's dance class 'whore-class' pretty disgusting actually. Then again maybe my brains just addled from all the depravity I witnessed at dancing.

Inneedofbrandy · 23/10/2012 21:16

Gyrating hips have been around forever Elvis. Grabbing crotches has been around forever to Michel Jackson! This is not a new thing and parents from generations and generations ago have been complaining but yet we are not damaged from singing hit me baby one more time!

PumpkInDublic · 23/10/2012 21:18

Some are great and confidence building Domino, some that I have seen had girls with tiny tight shorts just covering their bottoms and crop tops at primary school age with "sexy" dance moves.

Not all dance classes are bad but some, like the OP's do seem to encourage sexualisation of children.

I've seen the argument the children need to dress like this to be able to move Hmm. Anyone here who has DC who do karate or does it themselves will tell you how heavy the suits are. We move just as fast as dancers, jumping and leaping. The male dancers all wore joggers though....

Dominodonkey · 23/10/2012 21:22

OP - being more practical. If you can afford it perhaps send her to a proper dance school where they do grades and shows. You would get less of the type of dancing you are not happy with.

Inneedofbrandy · 23/10/2012 21:23

Softly I really disagree that you can train a baby from 5 months to be sexual, I disagree you could teach a 7 yr old to be sexually aware either. That is quite disgusting to think that.

Birdsgottafly · 23/10/2012 21:23

"Gyrating hips have been around forever Elvis"

Belly Dancing (formally called the dance of the Godesses), calls for gyrating, jiggly and shaking, women are beautiful and a pleasure to watch.

I think that the problem is that any female movement is seen as sexual, that is why female sport isn't given the respect that it should.

What we need to do is de-sexualise (not calling women whores would help) women/girls doing legitimate activities, even if semi clad.

Marzipanface · 23/10/2012 21:23

WHORE CLASS?
Blimey, I did dance classes when I was little and they consisted of tap dancing and musical style dance minus the high kicks!

I think the crotch dancing and sexy lyrics ARE inappropriate to be honest.

LineRunner · 23/10/2012 21:27

Isn't the point that OP doesn't like it, so should un-enroll her child from the class?

squeakytoy · 23/10/2012 21:28

"why wouldn't people think your daughters were available, if that's how you train them to behave from babyhood?"

eh???

My parents were latin and ballroom dance teachers. Ballroom is pretty tame still, but latin dance is very "provocative".. IF you want to view it that way. Most kids just enjoy doing the dancing and dont look any further than that..

KeithLeMonde · 23/10/2012 21:28

I never understand why all the 8 year old girls need fake tan and heavy make-up to do the shows. I'm sure they would look much better just as good without it.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 23/10/2012 21:28

Lovebunny are yku Fabbychic's long lost twin sister?

squeakytoy · 23/10/2012 21:30

I can understand the tan and heavy make up. It makes a difference under stage lighting.

Even as a kid when I was in the church pantomimes and shows we were plastered in theatrical tan and make up.

HanSolo · 23/10/2012 21:32

'Whore class' from someone named 'lovebunny'?
You couldn't make it up....

therumoursaretrue · 23/10/2012 21:33

Totally agree Wilson. Attitudes like that are 1000 times more damaging to women than any dance class.

BadgersBottom · 23/10/2012 21:42

you send your daughter to whore-class

Typical of lovebunny. Why is anyone even surprised?

Inneedofbrandy · 23/10/2012 21:47

I was waiting for worra to tell her off badger Grin

DioneTheDiabolist · 23/10/2012 21:47

"If you want my body,
And you think I'm sexy,
Come on sugar let me know.

If you really need me
Just reach out and touch me,
Come on honey tell me so."

Ok, so now I'm showing my age. This was a popular song when I was a lass. Me and my friends would sing it constantly. It didn't turn any of us into whores.

Dominodonkey · 23/10/2012 21:48

hobnon so true, but fabbychic hasn't been around lately.........

StuntGirl · 23/10/2012 21:51

Arf @ whore class Grin It's too ludicrous to take seriously.

If you're unhappy with the class then you can probably find somewhere else OP. Personally I would not be happy with my kid dancing to pop songs as I feel the content is not appropriate for small children. But then I don't listen to pop normally anyway.

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