to think farting in class doesn't warrant detention?

[CuriousMama]

DS2 is year 7 and today one of his friend's got detention for letting rip in class. This dc is a really good kid, polite and popular. DS2 says he's never disruptive it just came out, he didn't do it for attention.

I think it's so sad. What if the boy has a stomach bug coming on? Or IBS? There could be any manner of reasons why this happened. Surely telling him to go to the bathroom or even a bit of shouting to calm the class would've been enough? I imagine there would be lots of sniggering?

The teacher's well known for being ultra strict.

Tbh I can't even write his scrawl that he puts in ds2's book? I'd mention it to him if I didn't think it'd backfire on ds2. DS2 has (possible) Aspergers, he's under diagnosis, so I don't want to rock the boat. He's very sensitive and could end up in tears if he's told off.

So AIBU or do you think the teacher is right?

Funny I don't usually say bathroom? I say loo. So sorry I annoyed you though soverylucky We all get annoyed over silly little things I know I do. I get annoyed when people only read a bit of a thread yet have done it myself

noblegiraffe I said I'm going to mention it to SENCO. DS2 has Asperger's and is very shy no way would he mention it to the teacher. Plus the teacher is an arse by the sounds of it so there'd be no point telling him.

DS2 finds it difficult to lie. He said it was an obvious accident not on purpose and J wasn't laughing but embarrassed so I believe him.

I once farted very very loudly in class in Primary 5. I blame the teacher as she was in the middle of a particularly rabid 'fire and brimstone - why you're all going the kell except Kevin over there' rant (mad bat) and I literally had the fear of god in me before I came out. The flimsy plastic chair provided amazing vibrating accoustics.

She was too shocked/horrified to continue her rant.

You said you'd tell the head as payback!

You've decided the teacher is an arse but you haven't even talked to him? Why not just phone him and ask what he has written?

noble at 21:56:30 I said SENCO. Changed my mind.

DS1 said the teacher is dreadful, all the dcs hate him. DS1 is very measured and likes most of the teachers and I believe him. He felt so sorry for ds2 to be getting this particular teacher as he knew with ds2's problems he'd struggle in his class.

Some teachers aren't nice at all or very good at their jobs. I remember a couple who were terrible when I was at school, how they kept on teaching I'll never know? Thankfully some are fantastic, I just wish they all were.

No I think I'll pass on phoning him. I'll talk to the SENCO.

Frontpaw We had a mad as a hatter RE teacher when I was in year 7. Totally insane!

She wasn't even an RE teacher. Just a loon who enjoyed terrifying a class of 8 and 9 year olds. She is luck I didn't poo myself!

I do think you're being pretty unreasonable. Firstly, it's not your child, and therefore not really your concern. Secondly, you say that the entire class apart from teacher were in hysterics. Therefore the detention was given for disrupting the lesson - can you imagine what it is like trying to teach 30 children who are all rolling about in hysterics and sniggering and shouting comments? Classes very quickly descend into chaos which makes life very difficult for a teacher. A short sharp shock of giving a lunchtime detention to anyone who disrupts the learning for whatever reason is perfectly acceptable - otherwise it escalates, and every lesson someone is farting, burping loudly, falling off their chair, dropping all their books off the table, calling out or anything else they can think of to disturb the whole class and the whole lesson. (And it's always something they 'didn't do on PURPOSE....they couldn't help it!'

I am slightly concerned that in your post you say that your child is very sensitive and could end up in tears if 'he's told off'. Whilst you say he possibly has Aspergers and you are waiting for a diagnosis I think you may have to accept that your son is in mainstream schooling and that the rules have to apply to one and all, and that therefore it is fairly likely that if he does step out of line then he will be told off. You really can't put any child into a school but say, 'oh, you musn't tell him off - he won't like it', unfortunately.

sowornout I agree wholeheartedly re: the telling off if ds2 plays up. I'm fairly assertive with him myself. I do make allowances though but only to a point. As I said at 21:55:16 he'd need reprimanding if he was OTT. Being distracted etc.. is the way he is but I'd also expect and hope any teacher would try to get him to concentrate. I'm really glad he's in mainstream with his friends. He's doing well and trying hard which is all I can expect. I would never ever dream of saying 'oh, you mustn't tell him off - he won't like it' where did I say that? I'd be embarrassed at myself if I was that sort of mother. I was always involved in primary school. Even ds2's teacher there said she wished all parents could be so interested. And I supported any telling off for disruption. DS2 used to laugh and find it hard to stop. It must've been awful. She had a lot to deal with in that huge class. It calmed down though thank God. I'll no doubt find out how he's behaving or not at the first parent's evening?

Oh and yes it is my concern if a child who I care about is upset. I care for dss friends. In fact I'm a sucker for all dcs tbh. Even the tearaways.

I would hope that the teachers would try to get him focussed on his work calmly, too. They certainly should do. You sound like a very good, caring mother. This teacher sounds fairly strict - but you might find that DS does very well in this class. He will perhaps find it a lot easier to concentrate in a classroom where the rules are clear and other pupils can't disrupt his learning/concentration. Teachers will make an allowance for Asperger's children or children they know have problems (or they should!) but obviously certain things they have to be firm about.

I perhaps mis-read the post - I agree that you can be concerned if a child is upset, but unfortunately you can't really do anything about it if it's not your child is what I meant to say.

Thanks sowornout, I am very caring, probably too much some would say. DS2 is the same, I sometimes wonder if I have Aspergers too? I found it hard to concentrate in class yet when I did I did very well. Mind you my home life wasn't very settled so could've been that?

No I wouldn't do anything about J's incident it's up to his parents. Going by his usual behaviour he seems very well brought up so perhaps they will have words?