To stop dd2's swimming lessons

[mrsshackleton]

DD2 is 5. Her sister is 7 and swims reasonably well, (she's dyspraxic so will never be a star), having had lessons for 3 years with the local swimming teacher who teaches the whole neighbourhod.
DD2 is a feisty character generally, but has always been nervous in the water. She had some one-ton-one lessons with this teacher when she was 4 but was so argumentative with him (masking her fear) that he stopped them. She started group lessons in the summer and seemed to be progressing OK, but now the class is moving on, ditching armbands, jumping in etc and dd2 is having none of it. Last week she cried throughout the lesson, so the teacher asked her to get out. Today, on the way home from school she started crying again, saying she was frightened of jumping in, not using armbands etc.

So I've said OK, no more swimming lessons for a few months until you're brave enough to try again. Have left a message for the teacher to tell him so. Was that the right thing to do? And how, long term, will I get her to overcome this fear? Thanks

WestYorkshire - I can't believe you kept putting your child through that

I have followed Seeker's method of my dcs learning to swim. Never done lessons except the regular school lessons later in primary school. My older dcs can swim well and dd3 is confident in the water with a flotation aid. I agree that swimming lessons are seen as a must for young children and that's not the case.

Lessons aren't a must but learning to swim is.

And most choose to learn in an indoor heated pool.

And most choose to learn in an indoor heated pool.

lol - my OH taught himself in the river at the bottom of the garden in his childhood home - he'd freak if any of our kids went near it though. The same river has claimed quite a few lives, including his uncles.

If a fully clothed 5 year old fell into fast flowing river then the only chance that child would have would be very swift rescue- whether they could swim or not.

I would be amazed if any small child has ever been saved from drowning by being able to swim. Unless, as I sqid, they fell into q warm, clear still pool wearing a swimming costume.

How would you ever know seeker? I seriously don't think that in the above scenario it would make much difference, but maybe if they knew that they could swim, they may manage not to panic as much and might be able to float long enough for a rescue to be possible.

I'd rather go with the being able to swim than not just purely from the confidence factor.

I agree,in a fast flowing river,even an adult would be dependent on rescue quite probably.

But in a river with a slight current a swimmer may be able to keep their head above water and make their way to the bank.With no swimming skills at all they would not.

I am biased though.
I speak as a qualified swimming teacher and ex lifeguard so I believe in swimming skills saving lives.

I really don't get this obsession with swimming lessons. Being able to swim a length of a warm pool won't help you if you get swept out to sea, or fall into a river or a lake or something.

DD1 fell into the river fully clothed (a bit in MIL's garden where we sometimes swim anyway, but it was cold water) when she was 5 after having lessons for a few months, and she had turned round and swum herself out before I could even give her an arm to pull her up. Of course it's not quite the open seas, but the lessons had already made some difference. The first thing they taught they was to reach for the sides and pull themselves out.

But YANBU, OP, I agree. A few months out of lessons won't do any harm. they pick it up fast at 5/6.

I don't expect my dds to be able to swim themselves out of falling into cold natural water - river, sea etc - due to their swimming lessons. I do expect them to be able to enjoy holidaying at a place with a swimming pool without me following them around every inch of the way clucking about their armbands. I think that's what OP is hoping for in the future too.