Irrational parent at school

[KaleidoscopeHeart]

First post so apologies if it is in the wrong place. To cut a long story short my DD had a small gathering for her birthday last year (3 children). A parent at school at around this time stopped talking to me. I found out it was because her DD was not one of the three. Our daughters are not that friendly so I was very surprised. I tried repeatedly to talk to her, emailed her etc to try to resolve this but was constantly rebuffed and was told to stay out of her way (by her). All very awkward as we are a small school, but life goes on.

All fine, have managed to avoid her, until now. We have a night out planned with some other mothers - (some who I know well, others not so well) and we are both invited. What should I do? I feel it is unfair to go and make others feel awkward, but my friends say that if I don't go "she has won".

What should I do? As I have done nothing wrong I feel I should go, but I care enough about my friends to not want to put them in an awkward position. But if I don't go is this letting her think her behaviour is acceptable?

Go!!! Be pleasant and civil, then don't sit near her and have fun with people you do like. Make sure your explanation is out there in a calm "gosh I really don't see the problem" way if she does/says anything. Then ignore. She will come across as the loon with a problem, you will come across as the sane one! And don't fret.

Go and just keep taking the high road

If you'd invite all 29 other children in the class but left hers out I'd have understood her ire (I have an SN son, so this has happened to us more times than I can count in the early years, and it does hurt). However you had a grand total of 3 kids round for a birthday tea, that's not some MAJOR event iykwim. The woman needs to get overherself!!!!!

It's quite common to invite a couple of mates round one week for one specific activity, and a couple of totally different ones another time. It's swings and roundabouts, but all evens out in the wash so no child feels like a billy no mates overall. Frankly she needs to learn the world doesn't revolve around her iykwim. As adults we do the same, (my doggy friends are a different clique to my SN Mum friends etc, etc).

Go, smile, be charming as you have done nothing wrong at all. It really is a storm in a tea cup. Perhaps if she sees the light of common sense, you can invite her child round to play at half term one afternoon, or vica versa?

Gawd, how old is she? It's understandable if girls get upset by being left out of parties, but the parent?! She sounds like a right cow. I wouldn't particularly want to be spend an evening in her company but I'm guessing if these are school-mum related events there will be others and why should you miss out?

Just go along and brazen it out. She's an idiot...

I've never found the school gates turned me back into a child again. How odd.

Yes definitely go, and say hello and see how she reacts, or just ignore the srtoppy cow

You are not the one putting friends in an awkward position, she is by being petty

When/if you find that one school mum is bitching about you and you are discussing this with other school mums, and they're agreeing she's a bitch, and you're agonizing about a night out cos she'll be there but your camp says you can't let her win, but you're worried enough to post about it on a forum and the advice is to go and pretend to gave a good time to make her feel bad....

it's time to disengage.

Stop talking about it, stop thinking about it, you are a grown woman and this prepubescent infighting (and don't tellvme she started it!!) is beneath you.

Honestly disengage from the school gate gossip it's makes for a healthier mind. It can drag you down, but if you don't know you don't give a toss and you get on with whatever really matters to you.

You know what's going to happen don't you? You are going to agonise over this, go anyway and she'll either not show up or will be sat at the other end of the table and afterwards you will wonder why you ever gave it a moment's thought.

I can beat that, MrsJay. At DS1's first nursery there was another child with the same reusable nappies. The other child was accidentally sent home in one of our nappies and the mother (who had a bit of a reputation with the nursery for bizarre complaints) went ballistic and returned it to me wwith her child's poo still in it.

Not sure what happened there.

It was meant to say with her child's poo still in it!

I am embarrassed for her. What weird behaviour. I wouldnt let someone so unhinged make me change any plans I had dont know why you are even querying whether you should go or not.