To wonder why i don't care?

[CookingFunt]

I have four DC and I'm starting to wonder if I'm strange not to care about Prams,slings,cloth or disposable,blw,Co sleeping or whatever choices people make for their babies. As long as the baby is safe and well,what's the harm IMO.
Every toddler or baby group or parenting site seems to have stuff like that as hot topics. Its even dripping into the staff room.
Or maybe I'm just a grumpy cow in my old age.

I cared with my first, don't care about all that with my second. I avoid baby groups as I don't want to have the conversations about feeding, sleeping, slings and buggies, milestones....omg, sooo boring.

god no YANBU. I think most people who have more than one cotton on pretty quick to this idea, but I do think (an I am going to whisper this, then run away), from observing the other mums I know, that SAHM seem to overthink things a bit and make more out of things than they should. One approaches each stage of parenting like a new project, buys several books a month or two in advance, reads them, makes notes, ponders how they will apply to her DDs (who naturally are just that little bit more problematic or complicated than everyone else's) and so on. This is an extreme example but it does seem to me, rightly or wrongly, that if what you do 24/7 is with and about your kids, it is harder to gain some perspective and realise that the brand of wipes, minutes of TV watched, supernanny vs House of horrors tiny tearaways etc is all really not that important. However, my extreme SAHM friend would retaliate that I don't think enough about these things and that's why my DS has taken about 6months to potty train

Hyperballad - it means Precious First Born.

it's that overexcited and over anxious stage in a parent's life where they buy a set of flash cards for their 4 week old baby

I cared when mine were babies. Really I did, now it would seem I don't give a fuck.

i have 2
i dont care--its all just made up stuff
but i think i have come to realise that not caring comes with being confident. And those people who do care, are often not so confident about what they are doing....so dont knock 'em

You are SO in the right not to care.
It is all commercially driven mind bending advertising and promotions that makes us care in the first place- mixed in with a bit of evolutionary "I want my baby to grow up well"
I found toddler groups and the like very difficult because there was so much of this talk- it is so meaningless and unimportant. Babies don't need much except love , food and warmth!

Aaah! Thanks Hectate! I was beginning to think it was so obvious no-one could be bothered to answer my question!! I have a PFB who is now 14 weeks old. I love him more than anything but judging by these posts I'm acting like he is ds3!

I'm giving myself a pat on the back for being a chilled and relaxed mum so far.....(it's only been 14weeks I hear you cry!!..... :). )

you're doing well if you've made it to 14 weeks without displaying symptoms!

I used to strip, bath and change the clothes of my PFB every time he threw up or dribbled.

with my second, he got a wash when he was so crusty you could no longer bend him

I have 2 dc with a 6 year age gap and cared not what other people do/did, nor about their opinions of what I did for mine with both tbh! As long as it's in the best interest of your child and your family, then it's of no concern to anyone else. I also think other people's reactions say more about them than you.
Oh and I've only known non-judgemental toddler groups fortunately or maybe I have a hide like a rhino

"Pidj when you find yourself in stirrups with two doctors and a fuck off spotlight glaring into the business end of your fanjo, you will honestly not care if the nurse wants to invite her extended family to watch you shower."

DSPomBears - I used to think when people said they had spluttered their coffee over the keyboard laughing , it was a turn of phrase ................

(Dabs ineffectually at keyboard) . That has quite cheered me up this morning .

I read EVERYTHING before my PFB and wasted hours / days / weeks analysing EVERYTHING with my new mum friends. I worried myself silly. I barely glanced at the books second time round. I was too busy doing it, to be worried about doing it PERFECTLY

I used to warm the baby wipes by leaving them next to the radiator, try new brands out on my own undercarriage, to make sure they really were sensitive and spent ages washing / changing clothes that weren't dirty....To be fair, my PFB is INCREDIBLY advanced and my DS is just my second child

I'm grateful to have noticed stuff that needs doing now, rather than worrying about how to do it properly

First time parents need to step away from the internet. And close the books.

When I had my first baby, I didn't have a computer (so no internet, although I have it on good authority that it did exist!) and I didn't read any baby books.

I did think that I would probably manage by following my instincts and 'listening' to my baby.

It worked well for us.

I care that new parents follow their instincts.

That if they feel BFing (for as long as they like) or co-sleeping improve their families life they should give it a go.

I also feel that new parents should be reminded to think very hard about their lifestyle before buying pushchairs, cotbeds, high chairs, car seats etc. that are too, big, heavy, complicated and don't fit their cars, homes or do their backs in.

some parents dont have instincts that they can rely on though...and so read all this stuff, to try to work out what to do...