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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be suffering food banking confusion

68 replies

ICBINEG · 10/10/2012 17:05

So erm not earth shattering this one but:

I was trying to buy food for food banking but cannot figure out if I should buy basics/value stuff or just more of what I would buy myself.

If I buy non-value then that seems wrong because I could be buying more food for the same money...

If I buy value I feel like I am buying food for the bank that I apparently don't think is good enough for me and mine...

So erm what should I be doing and ideally how do I stop feeling like a bit of shit regardless of what I do....

OP posts:
MsRinky · 10/10/2012 17:07

Do what I do and set up a monthly direct debit, however small and let the people who run it decide how the money is best spent. Plus as it's then eligible for GiftAid, I get the pleasure of making George Osbourne contribute 20% on top.

WhenShallWeThreeMeetAgain · 10/10/2012 17:08

I think you've said it all in the sentence "I apparently don't think is good enough for me and mine..."

Why would anyone think that, but you obviously do?

MrsTerryPratchett · 10/10/2012 17:08

I think buy what you would for yourself. It is nice for people and makes them feel valued. Much more importantly, buy things that make a meal with no additions. So, don't get a box of macaroni cheese that needs butter and milk to make it. That costs a fortune and doesn't really help. Tinned veg, beans, pasta sauce and pasta all that jazz. Phone and ask the food bank what they are short of. They will probably have some ideas and help you choose wisely.

Original poster
ICBINEG · 10/10/2012 17:09

oh! I didn't know I could do that.

okay now I feel guilty because I would rather buy something than give them money....what fraction of the money goes into the food?

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 10/10/2012 17:10

Never feel guilty for trying. Plenty of people don't even try.

Original poster
ICBINEG · 10/10/2012 17:10

I followed their instructions and got pasta and sauce etc. and tinned stuff and tea and coffee...

half of the stuff I don't actually buy in my normal weekly shop (tinned stuff and tea and coffee) so I didn't feel to bad about that.....

OP posts:
Original poster
ICBINEG · 10/10/2012 17:11

mrsT so you don't think someone will look at their non-value pasta and think I would have gotten 3 times as much if they had bought value?

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 10/10/2012 17:11

They often use the money to buy fresh stuff that can't be donated in a useful way.

FireOverBabylon · 10/10/2012 17:13

Personally, for tins I'd buy what you usually buy, if only because it must be hugely depressing to get a bag of stuff where everything's "value", so few tomatoes or beans compared to juice in the tins.

for other things, cereal etc I'd get the supermarket's own brand so again slightly better quality than value. alternatively, do you shop at places like lidl where they have decent bags of dried pasta cheaper than tesco's, sainsbury's.

MrsTerryPratchett · 10/10/2012 17:13

I would buy value pasta for myself so that would be fine to me. I wouldn't buy value ketchup

Original poster
ICBINEG · 10/10/2012 17:13

When Y Y why the hell don't I buy value for my family? This is a bloody good question....

Do you know I think it is for the same reason that my DH felt bad about buying something in a charity shop....he felt like they aren't aimed at him and so somehow it was wrong of him to buy the cheap clothes there...

I think my brain is broken...

OP posts:
Xnedra · 10/10/2012 17:15

Our local foodbank did a talk at church and asked for value and quantity so they could help more people.

MrsTerryPratchett · 10/10/2012 17:16

ICBINEG are you giving yourself any credit for this nice gesture or just tying yourself up in knots worrying? If you are not patting yourself on the back a bit YABU. Smile

Chopstheduck · 10/10/2012 17:17

our local foodbank is on facebook. Might be worth checking if yours is, and you can ask them yourself. Also, ours regularly posts lists of what they need.

PandaG · 10/10/2012 17:19

we buy the same quality we buy for ourselves, which happens to be Aldi.

FireOverBabylon · 10/10/2012 17:21

IC, if you can ,also put a cake in with a food parcel. Our food bank tries to put a cake in the bag when they know the family have a child with a birthday so they have a birthday cake even if they don't get much else.

Lovelygoldboots · 10/10/2012 17:23

I was having exactly the same dilemma in my local sainsbo's this week as there was a food bank collecting there. I did wonder about whether they have more success obtaining supplies this way than by just asking for donations . It is a nice feeling to do something "practical" and the kids were able to understand how lucky they were to be having tea tonight. But I did feel a bit Blush that I was feeling smug somehow. Its only going to get harder and harder for people to feed their families with the price of food going up so much.

CwtchesAndCuddles · 10/10/2012 17:23

I buy value stuff for myself, and for the food bank.

PunkInDublic · 10/10/2012 17:25

Agree with MrsTerry, any good deed is good! I eat value stuff all of the time, tonight's pudding is a banana with 9p tesco value custard that you make up with boiling water instead of milk.

Value ranges get a lot of bad press, we love value. I get mine from Tesco and we use : Custard, stuffing, pork luncheon meat, cheese slices, yogurts, pizza and garlic breads, tinned tomatoes and tinned veg, cereals are best from Morrisons, their own value cereals are delicious. We can do a weekly shop for £30, have more than enough and the money we save goes on extra fruit and fresh veg.

Basically YABU to be suffering confusion. You're doing something fab that will make someones life so much easier.

GrendelsMum · 10/10/2012 17:36

I was wondering about this myself (our church has started collecting for the local foodbank). I'd think that a cash donation would be more versatile?

Paradisefound · 10/10/2012 17:37

Well done, my mum volunteers at a food bank and they desperately need donations. I agree with what others have said contact the food bank direct and ask them what they need.

Pastabee · 10/10/2012 17:38

I agree with fireoverbabylon. I buy the basics pasta, rice etc but the shop's own tins / jars.

I don't buy basics for my family so i get where you are coming from but I have just always assumed if you are in need you would prefer to have more volume for the money I have to spend?

MrsTerryPratchett · 10/10/2012 17:42

Don't worry about feeling smug, Lovelygoldboots. Smug is a wonderful motivator!

The only thing I haven't liked is when I worked in shelters and people brought their young children in when they were donating always at Christmas to show them something. Sympathy, empathy, pity, I don't know but it left a bad taste in my mouth.

Adversecamber · 10/10/2012 17:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lovelygoldboots · 10/10/2012 17:58

Mrs TP, I think Diana bought Wills and Harry to a shelter once when they were little. It may have been started by her but I can understand that it might give an impression that anyone who is in the shelter is "other" to them. Most people are three months pay at the most from being homeless. Good luck Adversecamber. Sounds like you are doing a good thing.

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