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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Failure to remove a dead mouse

60 replies

bubbles11 · 05/10/2012 10:23

Friday mornings are manic for me getting 2 children to nursery and also on Fridays I try to hoover the house (husband does not like the hoover going when he is home) and sort out formula milk/ something for dinner etc before going to work
Almost finished the hooovering this morning (one room to go) babies in the car, failed to get something out of the freezer for dinner because as i was going to get it i saw a dead mouse which our cat obviously brought in lying on the carpet in the room between me and the freezer (the only room i had not hoovered)
it is both pathetic and lazy of me to have left a voicemessage for husband at work saying when you get home can you pick up the dead mouse for me isn't it. he knows I have a total hatred of mice (dead or alive) but still this is pathetic of me. Been trying to concentrate since i got to work but wondering whether i can creep home at lunchtime to ask the neighbour to do it. trouble is it is a 20 min drive each way to get home & back

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 05/10/2012 11:29

Then stop doing it.

And hoovering a room (no matter how small) putting the hoover away, grabbing your coat and getting into the car will take longer than 5 minutes.

Just stop doing it.

TheProvincialLady · 05/10/2012 11:30

You can change that straight away you know. Put the cd on in a different room from where you are vacuuming. Neither of mine liked the vacuum when they were younger but it's a fact of like they need to get used to isn't it? Unlike your precious diddums DH... I'm sorry this is opening up such a can of worms for you.

LadyMargolotta · 05/10/2012 11:33

My children didn't like the hoover much when they were little. But that didn't stop me doing it around then. They soon got used to it, and now even the three year old can help actually doing the hoovering sometimes.

Really wish you weren't planning to go home at lunchtime to see to the mouse

Merrylegs · 05/10/2012 11:33

Hoover the mouse up.

Then get him to empty the bag.

(You are quite mad btw.)

You both sound very very stressed actually.

(My dog hates the hoover too. He buries his head under a cushion with his little tail sticking up in the air. Does your DH do the same?)

Tamoo · 05/10/2012 11:34

Re. the hoovering thing. Kids don't realise housework is shit and they might like to join in. Could you give them a duster and a dustpan and brush and let them 'help'? My ds had a toy hoover at 3y-o it was one of his favourite toys.

LadyMargolotta · 05/10/2012 11:37

ooh yes hoover the dead mouse up

And when the hoover is blocked due to mouse, get him to use his Manly Skills to unblock it. Then tell him you are obviously incapable of correctly using a hoover so he should either
a) get a cleaner
b) do the hoovering himself
c) (my preferred option) get his mother to do it.

CremeEggThief · 05/10/2012 11:44

YANBU, OP. Make your H do it.

I don't understand why you and your DC appear to be tip-toeing around him all the time. It is completely unreasonable that the only way you feel you can get the vacuuming done is by locking two small children in the car for a few minutes, and doing it before a day's work. And housework should be something you share equally, not something you run around spending all your time on on your precious day off.

How much longer can you keep this up? Is this any way to live? Can you think about how you want things to be from now on and then discuss it with your H?

perplexedpirate · 05/10/2012 11:53

If I were you my husband would be getting that mouse for dinner, with a side of get-to-fuck salad.

PrincessSymbian · 05/10/2012 11:56

Is his cock made of solid gold or something? There is no way that you should be doing all the housework on top of the kids and employment.
And your mother in law should not be telling you how to run your home!

PurplePidjin · 05/10/2012 12:06

Wtf are you doing hoovering as part of the school run?

Saturday morning, dh takes kids to the park/swimming pool while you have a whip round. Or vice versa. Or, he behaves like a proper grown up and Deals With It. Kids are also old enough to start learning that sometimes boring stuff happens (obviously as long as they're in a safe place, which probably isn't the car!)

Or you could continue letting him be a diva who believes magic fairies do the housework...

ZiggyPlayedGuitar · 05/10/2012 12:09

Hope you're ok and manage to deal with the mouse OP. your posts are quite worrying, sounds like you're being treated like a right skivvy.

squeakytoy · 05/10/2012 12:11

dont hoover a dead mouse up for heavens sakes.. just get a dustpan and brush, sweep the body up, dump it in the dustbin.

it is a mouse, it is no more squeamish, dangerous, or difficult than it would be to pick a chicken up and put it into a roasting dish ready for the oven..

and as for putting the kids in the car while you do the housework... words fail me at the bizarreness of that..

MadBusLady · 05/10/2012 12:25

Exactly what Wilson Frickett said. There's a bloody iceberg under here, isn't there.

No, YANBU by asking your DH to clear up a dead mouse when he knows you hate them. But you've since decided that YABU and are going to skivvy around anyway, so I guess I've missed the boat on that one.

OhThisIsJustGrape · 05/10/2012 12:37

Please, please don't lock your children in the car whilst you Hoover. As pp said, you'd never hear a problem if it happened and what if you tripped carrying the Hoover down the stairs? A neighbour could report you for doing this if it happens as regularly as you say.

Your DH needs a swift kick up the arse - you're supposed to be a team but only one of you is doing all the shitwork :(

ZiggyPlayedGuitar · 06/10/2012 06:58

How did it go OP? Did you go back at lunch or did your H do it for you?

ErikNorseman · 06/10/2012 07:44

Op your life sounds incredibly stressful. Far more than a life should be. Why do you think that is? (Clue; you're married to it)

kilmuir · 06/10/2012 07:55

Poor children.
Who cares that DH does not like hoovering? Whats more important, obeying him or childrens welfare?
Really am amazed at some peoples priorities

Nagoo · 06/10/2012 07:59

what would happen if he came home and saw the mouse?

I am really worried about the pressure on a person who would do a 40 min trip to pick up a mouse she was phobic about picking up.

scrablet · 06/10/2012 08:05

OP, hope you are ok. Please listen to posters on here, they are concerned for you, you sound to be in a very difficult situation.

saffronwblue · 06/10/2012 08:06

You are bringing up another generation who are afraid of the Hoover? I hope you can see your way to maybe a few changes in the way things are done...
Hope mouse is gone by now.

Moln · 06/10/2012 08:15

This is baffling, and it's not about the mouse at all is it.

What would happen if you didn't vacuum? What would DH do? The obvious thing seems that it wouldn't be nice because yyou lock your children in a car to do it and you feel terrible for doing this but do it anyway, is that becasue your fear of DH is greater?

Why can't your DH pick up the mouse? Is it because it'd be there meaning the house isn't clean enough?

Why does your MIL think she should tell you when to clean the house, it's far from normal.

What does "stressed" actually mean? My DH has been stressed but it doesn't mean I have to do things I have a phobia about nor lock my children away to ensure the house is clean. He might be a bit snappy that's it (and that's it for most people too)

Your use of language in your posts is telling, how you put yourself down and the negative words you use about yourself

Moln · 06/10/2012 08:20

Oh and one question I missed. What happens if Dh hears the vacuum? Does he put his hands over his ear and start screaming or something else?

My dad hates the sound of the vacuum, he just lives with it though, goes into a different room, even does it himself at times if needs be. my mum never had to do it whilst he as out on tight timeslot. she didn't fear it not being done.

WhispersOfWickedness · 06/10/2012 09:36

Nagoo - yes, that worried me too. What exactly is it that the OP is afraid of if she doesn't do the cleaning/hoovering/picking up a dead mouse

whois · 06/10/2012 09:46

Fuck me, this screams "wrong, wrong, wrong" at me.

OP, why are you doing all the housework, why are you locking your children in the car, what are you so afraid of??? The relationship doesn't sound healthy. You husband sounds like he could turn out I be a bit of a nasty piece of work...???

NellyJob · 06/10/2012 09:53

a deep reading of OP reveals that twice she has described herself as ' failing', twice as 'pathetic', once as 'lazy', and has asked people to confirm that opinion of herself.
OP is your husband abusive?

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