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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think no I do not want my parcels to be delivered to a neighbour if I am out and

77 replies

threesocksmorgan · 01/10/2012 08:35

I don't want to take theirs in either.
I only speak to my next door neighbours, other than that I either don't know the others or they are not nice.
so why would I (SAHM so I will be lumbered) want to play post offices for them

OP posts:
ArtfulAardvark · 01/10/2012 09:35

I have neighbours I know personally and I regularly take delivery for from couriers and others I dont know and would rather not.

DH took delivery of an ENORMOUS box of Avon cosmetics for the flat across from us which sat in my hallway for ages and the "recipient" then waited for me to deliver in person to her, I dont WANT other peoples large boxes sitting in my hallway. Unless I am on her payroll, why the hell should I be operating a delivery service.

My other concern is if signing for goods on behalf of someone else, if that person then claims not to have received the parcel, doesnt that then leave YOU liable for it?

ArtfulAardvark · 01/10/2012 09:37

Plus, as Ed mentioned recorded - surely the whole premise on which Royal Mail sell this service is that it is signed for at its destination....not at one of the houses down the same road.

dottyspotty2 · 01/10/2012 09:40

YANBU We have opted out got a letter several weeks ago with a number on to phone they then sent a sticker to put near my letter box, before anyone says anything we have lived here 20 years and last time 'my lovely neighbour' took a parcel in we got a knock on the door after she dumped it on the step was £200 of equipment if we hadn't heard her it could of been stolen.

EdMcDunnough · 01/10/2012 09:40

Yes exactly - if you have something arriving, you've gone out, a few days later you check online and it says it's been delivered and there's a signature you don't even recognise - you're stuffed. Someone else has got your parcel and you don't know who.

There was a thread about this the other week.

aldiwhore · 01/10/2012 09:41

All you have to do is say 'I can't take this parcel, bye'.

I'm lucky in that my neighbours are nice, I take their parcels, buut I don't take others as I don't know the people (and there's a fair old distance between my house and theirs).

Its not compulsory to receive post that isn't for you so I don't see the point of all the 'woe'... for that only, YABU. Smile

EdMcDunnough · 01/10/2012 09:42

That doesn't stop the postman leaving YOUR stuff with someone else though.

That concerns me far more - I rarely mind taking stuff for our neighbours, they are lovely. Except one house I won't do it for again, they're really rude.

Poledra · 01/10/2012 09:43

I was hugely embarrassed during the summer as it was my DD3's birthday and my next-door neighbour was at home with a very new baby. She took in at least 4 parcels for me, and I felt dreadful as I was concerned that she was being disturbed too much. Also, they sometimes don't answer their door (their prerogative, of course) so it can be difficult getting the delivery from them - the etiquette is a minefield - wait for them to knock on our door and let them think we're lazy buggers or knock on their door and feel bad if you're disturbing them. Thet're perfectly nice people, BTW, just very private.

On the other side, we live next door to the sub post-office... postie never leaves parcels there Confused

EdMcDunnough · 01/10/2012 09:46

Poledra, that's exactly how I feel. I hate to impose on people, I really hate it.

ArtfulAardvark · 01/10/2012 09:59

I think the idea of this is to allow Royal Mail to be operating on a level playing field rather than to different rules, because all other couriers do this ANYWAY in my experience.

BUT it is putting me in a situation where I have to say "Who is it for" AND then effectively telling a 3rd party which of my neighbours I like and which I dont, which living in a small community I would rather NOT do LOL.

I DO have some reservations over MY parcels doing elsewhere tbh though - DS wants an I-pod touch for xmas!!!

LilyCocoplatt · 01/10/2012 10:10

I would rather the postie left my parcel with a neighbour than in the top of the recycling bin which has happened a couple of times, if anyone had watched him do that it wouldn't exactly be difficult for them to open the lid of the bin and nick the parcel. It's put me off ordering expensive stuff online, I usually opt for delivery to a local store so I can collect it myself now.

halcyondays · 01/10/2012 10:16

Opt out then. I take in parcels for neighbours sometimes,it's no big deal. I think it's a good idea, I trust my neighbours with my parcels and it's much easier and cheaper than having to go down to the post office. If I didn't like my neighbours, then I would opt out, but what are they going to do, run off with our parcels?

halcyondays · 01/10/2012 10:17

I would rather they left them with a neighbour than leave them, very obviously under the doormat.

halcyondays · 01/10/2012 10:20

I just don't get the fuss about this, I am quite happy to take in a parcel for someone and my neighbours have happily taken our parcels. I just keep them until I see they're in, then go rond and hand it over,takes about a minute. It would seem a bit miserable not to take a parcel for someone, it really doesn't put you out much.

EdMcDunnough · 01/10/2012 10:26

It's not that Halcyon. I am very happy to do it for them. I just don't like them to be disturbed by the postman when it's something I've ordered, it doesn't feel right.

I don't like to impose.

RunnerHasbeen · 01/10/2012 10:33

I think that if you are embarrassed to say to the postie "yes I do mind, I won't take it" then you know on some level it is unreasonable or at least rude and antisocial. If you are sure enough of your stance, or have good reasons, then you should be able to refuse when he asks. It isn't like they sneak the package past you into your hallway. I don't think you can go and moan online if you haven't had the courage to say no when asked.

halcyondays · 01/10/2012 10:34

I don't see it as much of an imposition, it only happens occasionally and neither I nor any of my neighbours seem to have any problem with it. Unless someone is ill or does night shifts or whatever, then having the postman knock is really no bother.

melodyangel · 01/10/2012 10:36

Er Op yes you can sometimes get lumbered with being the local post office if your the only one home during the day. The problem is when your neighbours take it for granted and start having everything delivered during the week WHEN THEY ARE NOT AT HOME! By everything I mean carpets, wardrobes, beds ect....and this is my very lovely neighbour. Although I suppose royal mail don't do those sorts of deliveries.

Never said no to a delivery mind as that would be rude and I'm a wimp

WilsonFrickett · 01/10/2012 10:37

Most courier companies already do this, Royal Mail are just catching up with them. Our sorting office is miles away and impossible to get to by public transport too, so I'm quite happy with it.

Recorded still has to be signed for as usual.

Startailoforangeandgold · 01/10/2012 10:41

I'd much rather they carried on leaving stuff in my porch as they do now.

Out of sight in a rural backwater.

My neighbours are nice, but one lot have busy lives and small DCs. I'm sure they don't want to play postman.

The others are dysfunctional, frequently drunk and total incapable of organising themselves. Likelihood of remembering other peoples parcels very variable.

Chances of only turning up with parcel when they want to borrow phone, tools or petrol very high.

Poledra · 01/10/2012 11:06

See, I don't mind taking in parcels for my neighbours at all. I just feel like I'm imposing when they take in parcels for me. Especially around Christmas or one of the DCs' birthdays, when quite a lot of stuff comes in.

SoupDragon · 01/10/2012 11:10

Good lord. There's no need to get your knickers in a twist about it.

Just opt out.

I am the local PO for my neighbours. Doesn't bother me as it really isn't a hassle - I just send a child off with it once the neighbour is back. It's hardly a Himalayan trek.

NameChangeGalore · 01/10/2012 11:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

whojamaflip · 01/10/2012 11:25

we already do this in our lane BUT I will be making a point to speak to the postie to tell him under no circumstances is he to leave anything with my immediate neighbour - he is very strange and I would never see the parcel again he would probably call the police to complain again. Its a hassle I can do without.

Agree with pp that the dc's make good delivery boys/ girls Grin

ClippedPhoenix · 01/10/2012 11:28

Blimey, you can certainly tell it's Monday morning on here today Grin

You don't HAVE to take the parcels in you know. I'd be a grateful neighbour if you did though.

gazzalw · 01/10/2012 11:36

It think we've already been trialing this system where we live....but it doesn't work most of the time because neighbours are generally out at work during the daytime. Don't mind doing it for immediate neighbours but wouldn't want the postie to be delivering further afield.

It's fine if it's just a small parcel or you only have it for a few hours - but do remember that DW once took a very, large parcel (it was close to Christmas) for someone about three doors away, when DD was a baby (so it was not convenient really to have to go knocking on doors repeatedly) - she kept going round to see if they were in (because they didn't collect it) and it was days before they finally did so....

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