to need a cuddle

[uptothestars]

Thats it....I feel like I need a really really big massive cuddle but the reality of it scares me to death.

Bit of background..single parent to two beautiful girls, feeling very alone and need someone to hold me. I need to feel safe. Just for a little while. But the intimacy of it scares me so much that i think I'll never have it.

I'd like to say I'm not bothered, that I'm ok on my own, which I think I am, but sometimes I feel like I need someone there to hold on to me and wrap me up tight in their arms and not let go.

In reality, if anyone got that close I'd run a mile. AIBU? Is it something I really need or am I just wanting something I've not got?
I'm not even that good at closeness.

You could be me! It's easy to feel alone at this time of night/morning though. I've been a bad sleeper for a long time and I can safely say the early hours are the worst!

Everyone needs comfort and support at some point, especially in the wee small hours.

What is it that'd make you run a mile?

I'm not very good a closeness either but I think I was just made like that.

You can be happy and alone and not happy being alone at the same time, it's good you recognise you need something more to feel secure because then you can do something about it.

i'd start working on that if i were you. get some counselling and some babysitting (reliable persons, obviously), and get out there.

being alone becomes a way of life and what seems scary now will be totally unacceptable to you in ten years time.

work on it. you could have a real life. good luck.

I think maybe I was just feeling a little bit sorry for myself
Had some amazing cuddles today off my girls

My Dad never failed me on this.

Eveyine's allowed to feel like this. Hugs and cuddles are for me the nicest thing in the world, and I'm not a great touchy feely person. Not being held is the only thing I really struggle with. I have a close friend that keeps telling me how they admire how strong I am. I'm not - I cry somwtimes because all I want is to be held and told 'it'll be ok', but my lack of trust means it probably aint going to happen this side of hell freezing over. So YANBU - you are being perfectly normal in my eyes

Here's one form me ((((hug))))!

Hmm...lack of trust. That sounds familiar
Still not sure whether IABU or not. The needing a cuddle makes me feel VU. Maybe wanting a cuddle is not so U.