To Be P***** Off at yet another expensive school trip

[meah]

Hi, my ds has is now starting yr 9 & dd yr 8, in yr 7 a school trip was offered but cost was in the £300s (i forget exactly how much) being so expensive i couldn't afford it and it left both kids gutted when well over half of the kids in their yr got to go. ive just recieved another school trip email (not sure which yr not that it matters) offering a ski holiday trip, abroad for 6 nights for £680. which would be fantastic if i where loaded!! Why cant schools offer school trips that are affordable to all like they're supposed to instead of making those whos parents cant afford it feel left out!!!

hi
dikkerjedap my ex husband works in a factory and yes i do work .
lots of bussinesses now envolve working abroad.its important children exprience the wider world ready for their future and to give them independance away from home.
since our children were born we have saved a tiny amount every month for things like trips and towards the possibiltly of university a first for our family.
our children will be given a small amount of money for their birthday and christmas instesd of presents and do jobs for others so they will contribute as i dont want to teach them they can have everything in life.

I don't think one single person on this whole thread is in favour of teaching children they can have everything they want in life. Tbh that is a moot point.

But is it okay that some children will get fuck all of what they want? Including in school?

Of course that's not ok, but is that what we are talking about here? The OP was about a school trip costing £680. Does not going on a (extra curricular) school trip mean that the child gets 'fuck all of what they want' or just that they can't go on that one school trip?

DD wanted to do 4 out of school clubs. We could have afforded all 4, but I told her no, she could only do two. She had to choose which two she wanted more. She was disappointed, and whinged for a few days, but finally chose two. She is also aware that being able to do two clubs, was two more than some of her friends could do, she knows she is lucky in that respect.

If later down the line these sort of holidays become an issue (if schools are still doing them) I would hope to be able to afford them. But if we can't then I will simply tell DD the truth. If she then wants to fundraise herself to be able to go I will support and help her in any way I can.

Until this country becomes communist there will always be people with more money than others. I think that is something that a child should be aware of.

Blimey £270 is expensive Jenai! Is that what the whole county charges?

It's £180 at DS's school and a straw poll of the area found a lot of schools are paying less than that. Not sure how they did it as DS's school were subsidising it a lot last year and only by a lot of jiggery pokery have they managed to break even on it this year.

Not that £180 is that much more affordable that every parent could afford it and we do get some complaints but it is a fairly significant difference between our two areas (which aren't that far apart geographically either).

As far as this discussion goes, the school area aware that some people can't afford it but take the view that it is a lot cheaper than private lessons which means that some children can afford to do it with the school when they couldn't do it outside of school, plus it would be unfair to take away the opportunity from all the children just because a few can't afford it. I think that is as fair as it can be.

Thank god for sosweet, was beginning to despair...

EXCUSE ME

fundraising for the whole year was MY idea, if you don't mind. Huh.

LtEveDallas you think it's a good thing that when at school a child is aware of their parents having money or not? And that this then inevitably affects their experience of school?

I don't.

And I'm really not talking about every child having an entitlement to every trip. I'm talking about the children who will never get a sniff of a school trip or in fact any of the things offered through school which require the parent to pay.

I would say 'fuck all' is a fair description of what they get.

HullyGully Sorry I do remember you posting about it. But it was Flatbread's exciting toppings in the form of a business plan and children choosing the whereabouts of the trip that had that je ne sais quoi for me

huh

Isn't funny that in the past few years there is so much talk about debt and credit for holidays abroad, cars etc and families who lost their homes.

Now some of you are talking about 'priorities'. A skiing trip is a priority? Really?

I think it will be very sad if poor parents get this message that 'they are not good enough parents' or 'don't do their best for their dcs' if they don't pay for this 'fantastic opportunity' (be driven on icy roads in foggy conditions) and go and borrow money for the trip or live on baked beans and no heating in order to catch up with the 'good parents' and the 'amazing opportunities'.

What is this fab message you keep talking about? That you must do anything to buy what the glossy brochures promote and to try the 'in' sport at any cost?

I agree with those who said fundraising and local trips to countryside.

Well then you are not talking about the OP, which i was, so we are at cross purposes.

However, I do think it is a good thing for a child to understand that there are different levels of need, and poverty/wealth, yes.

It can hardly be hidden.

DDs primary school is an eclectic mix of the seriously struggling and the Birthday Pony brigade. We are somewhere in the middle. I believe that it is a good thing that DD understands that she is 'lucky' to have what she does, so that she doesn't become spoilt or grasping. She has friends on both sides of the fence so to speak, she enjoys spending time with all of them.

She knows that when her class asks for a 'voluntrary' contribution to a trip, we always pay double. She knows we can afford to do so, and why we choose to do so.

She knows that when homework calls for something to be printed off the Internet that her very best friend will come to ours to do it, because her mum doesn't have Internet at home (and yes, they could go to the library, but it's not that easy with younger children in tow).

By the same token she understands that her friend with the pony at the bottom of her garden is far more wealthy than us. She knows we couldn't afford one, so doesn't well hardly ever ask.

She knows how her father grew up, and knows how he got out of the poverty trap. She actually enjoys the stories her Nana tells her, and is shocked by some of the things she hears. At 7, she has an amazing understanding of the world, and also understands that real poverty is a great deal worse.

Sorry, that^^ was to ovenchips.

And sorry too Hully, but I also liked the business plan idea.

This thread has become laughable! Only on MN would people who want to send their children on trips offered by their schools become 'lazy mugs' who should be ashamed of themselves.

It is not selfish, me me me or I'm alright Jack to want to take advantage of something that a school offers.

Schools, you know, the people who we trust our children's education to, do actually think quite a lot about these trips. They obviously feel there is a benefit to it and that it's fair to offer them. If you think that schools are doing such an outrageous thing by offering opportunities, then you are pretty warped and you don't have to send your child to that school.

This thing about parents working - when someone says that they work and want to be able to spend the money they earn on their children, there is nothing wrong with that. It does not imply that someone else works hard enough, it is a simple statement about the person who made it, it has fuck all to do with anyone else. It doesn't imply anything. Why should it? Why are certain posters trying to turn the statement into something that its not? It's pathetic.

I never made the statement, although I agree with it. And no, I'm not a bankers wife with dodgy tax dealings that enable me to find a few hundred quid for a school trip, I'm school support staff and my DH is a sparky. Not exactly high flying professionals. Neither of us even have A Levels. It is ridiculous that anyone on MN who doesn't consider every aspect of their lives in relation to what poor people can and can't have becomes a selfish daily mail reader. It really is pathetic and belittles any valid points made by the people who disagree with school trips.

BigBoob I assumed the fees were set by the LA but it seems that isn't always the case. It's what ds's school charges, anyway.

So, oven - should schools stop offering instrument tuition?

YY LaQueen. We holidayed in Egypt this year and had a fab time. But DD couldnt wait to tell us about one of her classmates that did an "Actual Disney Cruise mum, Mickey Mouse ate dinner with them and everything"

Was she jealous? Yes, a bit. Does she know we wouldn't do that? Yes, definately.

I agree that school trips are too expensive. And it's harder for people with three or four children. And if people have a family holiday it is quite reasonable to refuse school trips. But if schools give a year's notice that does allow people to save up. So I'm on the fence over this one.

While I can see the difficultly, part of my reasons for not paying for private education was to be able to do the extras. Mine didn't do all of them by any means but they had some great trips. DS1 wouldn't have got to Russia when we had 2 primary aged school DCs, he couldn't have lived with a French family for a week if he had gone with us, all 3 did things I wouldn't do-no way would I go caving and squeeze through something called the letterbox!

LaQueenSat 29-Sep-12 11:24:03

"This thread has become laughable! Only on MN would people who want to send their children on trips offered by their schools become 'lazy mugs' who should be ashamed of themselves."

freddo It's the ever present MN Inverse Snobbery Effect.

Or the Every Child Matters and let us try and share the love...All depends what suits really.

I'm afraid I don't subscribe to this I am made to feel a poor parent because my child doesn't get this that or the other. We all do our best within our means. There will be parents richer and parents poorer no matter what.

Oh for goodness sake.

Of course children have different opportunities dependent on their parents incomes and they have to get used to this BUT this is about children having access to equal opportunities AT SCHOOL.

If these trips are really beneficial to their development but only the kids with wealthier parents can partake in that then it seems to me the equivalent of schools offering extra 'special' lessons to the rich kids.

Within a state school environment there should be no difference in the opportunities experienced THROUGH SCHOOL for the wealthier kids and poorer kids.

Obviously out of school they may have vastly different experiences with their families, and the poorer kids will have to learn that lesson in life. But when they enter the school gates any activity to do with school and all opportunities for educational experience should be the same.

And I speak as someone who can afford to send my children on all trips. But I believe that schools should only offer trips where subsidies can be offered to less wealthy parents to ensure all children to attend.

Out of school I can hire the QMII to sail us privately to MUstique if I want and the poor less fortunate will have to just suck it up. In your FACE poories!!!

But not when it's TO DO WITH SCHOOL.

(this thread makes me rather sad, when did the notion that all children should receive the same educational opportunities within the state sector get so lost???)

Lol at if you work hard you will reap the rewards. What a naive statement and I strongly suspect half of those who made that on here are living off their husbands anyway

ha ha ha ha ha!