for thinking this is too many activities for dd in one week

[Chundle]

Ok dd1 is 8.4. She does martial arts and footy and excels at both. Her weekly schedule at present is
Mon - centre of excellence training 35 min drive away
Tue - free
Wed - martial arts
Thur - club footy
Fri - martial art
Sat - footy match every 2nd week
Sun - free

At present she's home on a tues but our local footy team want her to play for their girls team. Is it too much to be out five nights a week at 8? Next April it will all change as she will most likely be on a contract for footy so will only play for centre of excellence so will be a lot less. How many activities do your kids do during week??

It seems that 7,8,9,10 is prime age for activities then they tend to die down a bit - just a couple more years to hold on for!!! At least next year they provide transport to away matches! Thanks for all responses guys most helpfu

Like the others say.

Out of interest, anyone else in here whose kids don't do millions of after school activities?

Mine used to do 6, now down to 2. Loving it

DS is also 8 and has signed up to a club every lunchtime at school. Added to that he goes to Cubs, swimming, hockey, Spanish, plays the oboe and helps out some weeks reading in church Disclaimer: we are not pushy parents, DS is very much of the "give it a go" school of thought!
We agreed at the beginning of term that he would only continue with everything if he kept up with his schoolwork and was not getting too tired and ratty Sometimes he needs an earlier night but explained in the context that its "because he puts in so much effort with his clubs" rather than "because you are miserable and being a PiTA" means he is generally accepting.
It seemed that this approach allowed him to try everything he wanted but gave us a get-out clause if it became too much.

Innedof I don't drive so afraid I can't claim supermum award! It's a superdad award lol. I do tea ready for when they get home and make dh flask of coffee to drink when he's watching activities. Me and dd2 walk dog or go for scooter ride after tea once they've gone out.

If they are happy and you can do it, then its fine.

Last year when DS2 was 8 he had an after school activity and an evening activity every day except Friday, two before school clubs, piano and taekwondo at weekends plus church on Sundays. He also has 3 instruments to practise . He was fine, had an excellent school report and finds time to play with friends.

He is now a chorister, which has cut back on the number of activities he can do but he just as committed time wise.

To those who said its only this age - I wish!

betty makes you feel quite inadequate (sp) all these super mums rushing around being a taxi!

Inneed- it does indeed but from a purely selfish point of view I dont want DS doing loads of things because I dont want to spend my time ferrying him about. I get home from work every day at 6 and by the time I've sorted out dinner, cleared away etc etc, I just want to chill and for him to wind down.

When he goes to secondary school I am sure he will want to do stuff but then at least he will probably go straight from school and will just need a lift back.

It depends on the child
Ds1 did school rugby and shooting and that was about it.

Dd has always wanted to do loads. She has a schedule that would make you want to weep. Some nights I collect her after 2 hours of gym and she eats in the car while I drive her to a two hour swimming session.

I talk to the school regularly. I keep a close eye on her.
She copes. She loves it. If that changes I will alter things.

Children are all different.

I agree pag they are. When dd1 was dd2s age she had already started both sports. Dd2 however has no inclination or interest in mixing with other kids let alone bear the thought of leaving mummy!! Think I have a few more years before she flees and enters the world of hobbies!

Yes betty mines from a selfish pov to. I don't have any energy in the evenings till my second wind about 9. I just couldn't be arsed. Mine would love doing more but it can wait till their in secondary to.

Who says it get's easier when they're in secondary!

Monday - Free
Tuesday - Cadets
Wednesday - Scouts
Thursday - After school sports, various
Friday - Cadets
Saturday - Free
Sunday - Cadets

I'm in the process of trying to persuade my son to drop something due to him having to study now for GCSE's.

Agree with previous posters that it very much depends on the child and your ability/willingness to ferry them. My DD1 did gym 3 times a week at 5 and has done between 10 and 15 hours a week ever since (she's now 13). Many other gymnasts do considerably more from a similar age, it's kind of standard. she also did theatre and ballet meaning that she was busy pretty much every night and many weekends between the ages of 7 and 10. Many of her friends were exactly the same.

However, she's always wanted to do things intensively, it's just what she's like. As she's got older some of the more peripheral things have been dropped but she's still very very busy.

IMportant to keep persepctive though - it's all too easy to get carried away when you're told you have a talented child.

DD2 on the other hand is interested in lots of stuff but has never had the slightest inclination to do any one thing multiple times a week. She needs lots of time for play (DD1 never really played with toys from age of 4), chilling at home or with her friends. if we have a stretch when we are too busy and not at home enough, she suffers. I build DD2 'playing' time into our schedule just as much as I build in gym runs and competitions. We have just got a new dog and I know she will love just spending lots of time with him.

As for me, I'm more of a DD2 type and quite relieved that DD1 can catch the bus occasionally now she's a bit older!

Depends on the child and not what other people say.

My three are busy - sometimes I think they're too busy:

DD (15)
Monday, Spanish, paper-round, cello
Tuesday, paper-round, dance
Wednesday, paper-round, dance x2
Thursday, twilight school course, paper-round, Guides
Friday, paper-round
Saturday, dance
Sunday, rowing, youth club

DS (13)
Monday, paper-round
Tuesday, paper-round, Spanish
Wednesday, paper-round, school sport, football
Thursday, paper-round, school sport, football, scouts
Friday, paper-round
Saturday, paper-round x 2, rowing, guitar
Sunday, paper-round, football

DS(11)
Monday, band, football
Tuesday, table-tennis
Wednesday, youth club
Thursday, rugby
Friday, judo
Saturday, football
Sunday, korfball

Not sure how we got here, and it's not necessarily let off the older they've got. They are coping with school work, and they do have time to hang out with friends. These two last points are the most important things.

It depends on how she copes with it. If she is bounding with energy and is keen then fine. If she is tired and cross then it's too much. I think I'd be the one who is exhausted.

I don't think there have been any studies on the long term effects of having a very busy schedule when you're a child. I would love someone to do one as it didn't used to be the norm.
I have mixed feelings - but in your DC's case it's a lot of time but focused on only two different things.
I worried about my DD having too many things on the go when she was doing her (scottish) GCSE's, so she cut back, but she still didn't spend any more time on her school work.

I can't decide between, 'The devil makes work for idle hands'
and the nagging feeling that overly busy children have no time to just sit and think about stuff, doodle on paper while you listen to music etc. Am thinking about emotional development here.

Choc I loved my idle time skinning around as a kid but dd1 being how she is doesn't know what to do with herself when she has idle time and she's an utter nightmare. She literally cannot just sit and relax until she's in her bed at night. It's how she's wired and I can't change that. I do hope dd2 is a bit more chilled and a homegirl ;)

Lordy, Lordy...
I am clearly a lazy cow!
CBBC on at moment, then tea, bath and reading in bed [glass of wine for moi]. If not raining may have played in park.

Well, I am going to disagree with most.

I think it is too much. I also think that it is an important skill to be able to amuse yourself, so I don't think that is is good if everything is organised all the time (talent or not).

It is also not correct that this never used to happen, however, it was probably rarer. My aunt was a top netball player when she was a teenager. She trained ALL THE TIME, played lots of games, was totally top notch.

Then she got a terrible injury, end of her sports career before it had properly started. Her world literary collapsed. She became a shadow of herself. She had never learnt how to amuse herself. She became really depressed.

Chocoluvva

Yes. I agree bout the 'sit and think time' thing.

But tbh DD has loads of that because she choses to.
She spends virtually no time using any kind of screen
That is not me being a sanctemonious, virtuous lentil weaver. It is just how she spends her day. It is a shock to me tbh but it's her choice.
I know people who do half the activities but less 'chill' time because all their relaxation choices are in front of a screen of some sort

Lots of children do large amounts of after school activities and cope just fine, some don't cope so well with it. It really depends on how she feels, whether she can cope with school the next day and how you feel about running round after her (it does get easier when they can get themselves to their clubs). If she is that good then I would want to give her every opportunity but also you need to watch her closely to see how she is coping with the rest of life.

If you can both manage it, then fine.

We only have two free days from activities too and it can be tiring (for the parents mainly ). My children have two ballet classes each, gymnastics and swimming.

Thanks all. Sorry didnt explain well, its not really that she won't/can't amuse herself its more down to her attention deficit disorder that she finds it hard to do quieter activities or occupy herself listening to music or reading for instance. Her endless energy never ceases to amaze me and I think channelling it in the right direction is the way forward with her as oppose to letting her out to play each night where she may be inclined to get up to mischief ;) she sits at average in schoolwork and slightly above average in literacy. So not slipping there. I'd never allow her schoolwork to suffer.
She has to learn Korean for her martial arts so good extra language skills :)