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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this is odd timing for a 2nd b. day party?

70 replies

pleasethanks · 23/09/2012 19:31

The party is for a 2 year old. Pretty much all the children attending are 2ish (and parents obviously!). The party is at 1.45 to 3.45.

Maybe IABU, but I thought pretty much all 2 year olds would be napping at some point in that window?!

Yes, it is not a huge issue, I know that, but it just seemed a bit funny timing to me. I am not relishing waking up DD early from her nap to take her to a party where she will get over excited!

OP posts:

halloweeneyqueeney · 23/09/2012 21:19

Well I wouldn't think it was rude, I often had people postpone meet ups/play dates for an hour or so because their LO had just fallen asleep and as a parent of a toddler I knew that these things can happen and at some point it'ld be me

LetsKateWin · 23/09/2012 21:21

DD rarely naps so it probably wouldn't cross my mind. She has never has never been much of a napper so I always used to forget about nap times when I was arranging to meet people.

The party needs to be at a time that suits the birthday person.

KittyMcAllister · 23/09/2012 21:22

I empathise OP! My DS (aged 3) has only recently dropped his nap which would be at least 1.5 hours from around 12.45. In my experience this is a really common nap time for toddlers. I would definitely have to decline the invite, and did used to if we were invited out at that time. FWIW if I'm arranging to meet up with other mums I nearly always do it in the morning as he's droopy by the afternoon. We've just had his birthday party starting at 10 and it got great attendance!

Original poster

pleasethanks · 23/09/2012 21:30

Kitty I fear I may have to do that. It is a shame as in theory DD would enjoy it, but the reality would be different I think!

OP posts:

XiCi · 23/09/2012 21:38

2 year old have naps??? I'm shocked at all these tales of toddlers that sleep during the day. My dd had dropped her nap by about 14 months old. She's non stop from 7 till 7. Naps are a very rare, but welcome, occurrence. Maybe the birthday girl doesn't nap and so it hasn't crossed their minds about the time. I had a 2nd birthday party for dd last month starting at this time and the issue just wouldn't have occurred to me. Not everyones child adheres to the same timetable where eating and sleeping is concerned.

SlimJimBra · 23/09/2012 21:47

My DS (almost 2) will nap at home after lunch but if we're out he'll happily keep going and crash out in the car/ buggy on the way home (even at4.30pm) I've just booked his party for lunchtime (12-2including food) but we've been to parties starting as early as 10.30 and as late as 3.

forevergreek · 23/09/2012 21:49

Yup, 17 month old has morning and afternoon nap :)
2.10 year old has 2 hour afternoon nap
Baby sleep on and off but min morn, long afternoon 2hr same as other 2, then short late afternoon

Those 2hrs when they all nap are the main reason we get trough the day and get things done! Whoever is home with them during nap time uses the time to cook evening meal/ make important calls/ wash/ organise/ or nap themselves!

I'm hoping naps continue until they are 18! :)

DontmindifIdo · 23/09/2012 21:52

oh, that would be fine for DS too, little or no naps here...

however, do you think they've put the timings like that so they don't need to feed the guests?

Rosa · 23/09/2012 21:53

Daft time IMO ....

catfart · 23/09/2012 21:56

Are you coming to my DS's party? It's next Sunday at 1.30pm till 3 pm!

Yabu, I checked with all the other mums and this fitted with the majority.

LadyWidmerpool · 23/09/2012 22:10

I was at a party this afternoon and the kids were on great form, no tears or grumping (except from my one year old). If you want your children to go to parties you have to be flexible. That said, a party at 4pm sounds like a total nightmare to me.

BOOGERSnLICEnNOTHINGnice · 24/09/2012 00:13

I'm sure it makes perfect sense to the parents, but they ABU. I find the concept of a 2 hour time slot strange for a toddler's party (for any child's birthday party, really).

Where I am from, we tell people to come over anytime from noon and stay any time until 7/8pm. That way, you've covered those children who may be napping, those families who have prior engagements etc.

I would turn LadyWidmerpool's statement on its head - the way I see it, if I want people to come and celebrate with me, I have to be flexible and make the event as convenient for them as I can.

halloweeneyqueeney · 24/09/2012 01:00

dear god! @ idea of 7 hour child's birthday party!
every one around here is a 2 hour time slot, that's enough!

shuffleballchange · 24/09/2012 06:02

DS2 naps 10.30ish to 12.00ish so the timing would be perfect for him, DS1 used to sleep in the afternoon, just another example of how they are all different.

Ragwort · 24/09/2012 08:31

XiCi - my DS had naps until he was 3 - he would go to playschool all morning (9.30- 12), come home, have lunch, sleep at least two hours, and then go to be promptly at 7pm. Perhaps I was lucky (or strict) - - that's just the way it was ! On more than one occasion he slept right through from about 2pm until the next morning !!! He only dropped the nap when he started full tdays at pre-school.

However, if he ever needed to miss the nap for whatever reason he was happy to do so .

wish he was so easy going now he's a pre-teen

Gingerbreadlatte · 24/09/2012 08:38

Like most posters, most times will be issue for someone so they've picked a window that suits them.

I've just had invite for a 4YO party (My DC is 3) for 3.30pm to 7pm on a sunday. That's massively long and way too late for a sunday night IMO. 7pm is lights out in our house, especially after a busy w/e.

Not sure whether to accept that one!

cory · 24/09/2012 09:09

Also parents of toddlers differ in how much they insist on the routine and how flexible they are- and no, depending on circumstances the toddlers don't always get to decide that.

When dc were little, we travelled a lot and stayed abroad with my family and went on day trips with them (with several other toddlers and babies) so their routines often had to give. When ds was a toddler, his sister was at school, so any naps he wanted had to fit around pick-up time.

BOOGERSnLICEnNOTHINGnice · 24/09/2012 09:17

The thing is, most people don't stay for the entire 7 hours - you'll find that they still adhere to an approximate 2-hour time slot but just end up coming/leaving at different times. The day runs more smoothly because people have enough time to not bring along tired/fractious children. It also means that I can do a quick tidy-up here and there (rather than a massive Herculean effort at the end of the day) and still have enough time to have uninterrupted conversations with parents who stay with their children.

Thingiebob · 24/09/2012 09:21

My DD dropped her nap at 18 months. I am suprised and envious that you have 2 yr olds napping in the day!

DeWe · 24/09/2012 09:44

Dd1 would have been asleep over that time (usually about 1:30-4:30) but I could have kept her awake and happy at a party until 4:00 and then she'd have slept on the way home and afterwards for about 2 hours. She was very easy to move her sleep though.

Dd2 didn't nap generally by that age. Certainly wouldn't have if there was a party on offer.

Ds always napped in the mornings.

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