To think this is irresponsible?

[ShavingPrimateRyan]

I'm watchings one born every minute:plus size about morbidly obese pregnant women. I'm and at the same time!
I get that most people do really want kids but sometimes there are circumstances where it is dangerous and irresponsible to do so.
The thing is being morbidly obese isn't a lifetime affliction, it can be changed by living a healthy life style and dropping weight.
A young woman on it is 21 stone and had to attend a clinic because her being pregnant was so dangerous. She was aware of the symptoms, but is smiling and telling the nurse she snacks all the time. Surely you wouldn't do this given the circumstances.
I'm in no means perfect I was a size 16 when I fell pregnant with my DD (unexpected) but when researching the risks I changed my lifestyle through diet and exercise and lost weight.
I understand it is hard when you are overweight to get the motivation to change. But if your morbidly obese why would you risk your health and your baby's. Why not try and lose weight before trying?
AIBU?

He was so teeny, my babies were all double that weighy. Ds4 was almost 11lb! He was all vernixy as well as tiny, cute as a button....is not broody oh no..

YABU, yes the risks are increased, but the risks are still there even if not overweight, getting pregnant is risky full stop.

Aww look at all that hair!

Anne has lost weight at the end of the pregnancy.

Two charlies! Aww

Unwise? rather than irresponsible because in my experience there is a huge amount of denial going on.

And layla/leila? Lovely and goid attitude bfeed and the go back on the diet.

All three mums have lost weight since having their babies :)

I wouldn't suggest anyone dieted whilst they were pregnant. So how do people expect them to lose weight

Wow look at all that weight loss! Looks like little ones have really provided those mums with motivation to get on top of their lifestyles. How fantastic :)

Indeed gold they were all doing really well :)

It doesn't seem particularly evident, though, that any of these women's complications were because of weight, as opposed to conditions that can affect anyone but which might be more likely for the obese. Also, the increased risk is not thought to be massive, certainly not so massive as to render such a pregnancy entirely irresponsible. Any pregnancy carries a risk. Although weight is a risk factor, thin women get pre-eclampsia and have inductions too. It's perfectly possible to have an entirely healthy pregnancy while obese, and there was little suggestion that there was anything that would seriously affect the babies in any of the features pregnancies that couldn't be addressed with appropriate medical attention, which was why I found it so worrying that Jill was made to feel uncomfortable when she attended her ante-natal appointments.

It would have been more interesting to hear more about the extra care and monitoring that these women would have needed through their pregnancies, as that is what really sets them apart during pregnancy rather than the births themselves, rather than fixating on complications that can affect anyone.

why do people always feel the need to apologise for the obese? No one made them be that weight, and to be honest, it's no one else's fault but their own. I say this as someone who has been fat, and is no longer, through daily (intense) exercise and restricted eating. I also say it as a fully qualified medical professional, who has spent a lot of time working with the obese population.

Let me assure those who say 'those complications could happen to anyone' that it is multiple times more likely in someone who is obese. This includes miscarriage (spontaneous abortion), pre-eclampsia, facial and spinal deformities, gestational diabetes, prolonged labour etc etc.

Anyone who is thinking about getting pregnant should first make sure that they have optimum physical health (and a normal BMI) as is possible. I think it is apologist and frankly weak to suggest that 'accidents happen' - any woman who respects and is aware of her body should know better than that. If you are having sex and you are not using contraception, then by default you are actively trying to get pregnant.

It is selfish behaviour to ignore the risks you are putting yourself and your baby through because of your weight. Additionally there are extra stresses placed on the medical team responsible for ensuring safe delivery and a live mother and baby, which frankly could be avoided. This could just as easily apply to someone who is underweight, or who has another long-term health problem, not discriminating solely against the obese.

These are, however, (as ever) just my opinions.

It's fair enough to say that women who are trying to get pregnant should be making an effort to get into optimum physical health.

But contraception can, and does, sometimes fail. Not all obese pregant women will have been having sex without using contraception.

Its the same as any bad habit/addiction surely. I know someone who is a drug addict who didn't stop using during pregnancy, I know several people who continued to smoke/drink during pregnancy. It's not something you can generally stop overnight, pregnant or not.

Morbidly obese doesn't necessarily mean much more than a size 16.

I didn't see the program but would put it in the category of choosing to conceive whilst a smoker knowing you wouldn't be unlikely to give up for the duration of your pregnancy, thus endangering your baby

Giving up alcohol-you totally stop having alcohol.

Giving up smoking-you totally stop having cigarettes.

Trying to lose weight-not so easy.

Stopping being judgemental-give it a go OP.

I am 'morbidly obese'. I work nights. I am awake more hours than should be humanly possible. That is known to be a major factor in becoming overweight. I work nights so I can be there for my DC.

I cannot cut out food all together, so it cannot be compared to giving up smoking or alcohol. I was this overweight when I had my last two DC. They are mostly fine, they would have been totally fine had the medical professionals listened to me. Still in your world they should not be here, because I should not have got pregnant till I lost weight.

I am very overweight (size 20) but gained only 13lbs in pregnancy. I ate much more healthily in pregnancy,ds was 9.7. I didn't lose weight to conceive as I was told I wouldn't have a baby without ivf. I lost quite a lot as I was very unwell after having him.
The next 7/8 months I grazed though & put weight on. Joined sw & lost 2.5 stone this year. It is a funny old relationship with food tbh. I was v aware of the complications in pregnancy & so did the best I could.