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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to keep ds all to myself?

26 replies

minime87 · 19/09/2012 21:11

After talking with friends today I'm starting to think we need to get out more!!..
Dp left when I was 5m pregnant and it has been just me and ds ever since. Ds was born prematurely not long after dp left and spent a little while in a special care unit before coming home. Now he is 10mo and our days are spent mostly playing together at home or at the park at the moment, we do have friends/ family/ other children over a couple of times a week usually. Now that my mat leave is over I have managed to get some night shifts so that ds is asleep while I'm gone as I just don't want him to be with anyone else if I can help it!? When I said today that I probally haven't spoken to another adult since saturday night at work (which doesn't bother me in the slightest) everyone looked at me like I had two heads?!... Please tell me its ok that I spend all my time playing cars and watching cbeebies?!

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 19/09/2012 21:13

YANBU Smile

Sounds like you're having a great time, don't pay any heed to what anyone else thinks, so long as you and your DS are happy.

SoleSource · 19/09/2012 21:16

Yadnbu :) you feel OK with you. That is fab.

BigFatLegsInWoolyTIghts · 19/09/2012 21:17

As long as ye're happy then that be foine moi dear. Arrrrrr! YANBU!

(talk like a pirate day today)

bulletwithbutterflywings · 19/09/2012 21:21

Yanbu :) And a bit lovely :)

QuangleWangleQuee · 19/09/2012 21:21

You are happy. Your ds will be having a lovely time with the person he loves most. What's not to like?

AgentZigzag · 19/09/2012 21:22

Is it BigFat? Already?

Comes round quicker every year, ya lily livered scurvy dog! Grin

Arrrgh, arrrhahaha

carma · 19/09/2012 21:22

It's absolutely fine, but who is with DS when you are working nights?

crackcrackcrak · 19/09/2012 21:23

You are lucky. Feeling a 100% ok about being at home with a baby didn't come as naturally to me. Enjoy it and him x

GoldPedanticPanda · 19/09/2012 21:23

Yanbu at all, when I was on my own with DS I'd go days without talking to other adults and I loved it.

WorraLiberty · 19/09/2012 21:23

YANBU but surely you must speak to whoever looks after the baby at night and during the day while you sleep?

AgentZigzag · 19/09/2012 21:25

Am I sensing the Mother of all drip feeds?

OP leaves her DS all night while she goes out to work Grin

Anonymumous · 19/09/2012 21:25

That's lovely. Smile I never understood this obsession with having adult conversation - it's mostly boring crud about what happened on EastEnders last night and gossiping about people you don't know very well and who aren't even very interesting. Whereas children do much more interesting things like pretending to be a 'little walking road', and asking very loud questions in public like, "Mummy, why haven't you got a willy?" Soooo much more fun! Grin

HoopDePoop · 19/09/2012 21:26

As long as you feel happy and you do have access to adult company if you want it, then you sound like a lovely mum!

Cluffyfunt · 19/09/2012 21:26

minime87 yanbu.
As long as you and your DS are happy (which it sounds like you are) then carry on Smile

BigFatLegsInWoolyTIghts
Now I feel like a right twit!
I've only been talking like a non pirate all day Blush

HoopDePoop · 19/09/2012 21:28

It's making me a bit teary actually reading all the nice responses to the OP - my MiL thinks DS has too much time when it's just the two of us, and is worried about my happiness - makes me think I'm weird for being totally satisfied (most of the time!) with my lovely similar aged DS Smile

Flojo1979 · 19/09/2012 21:28

I was wondering that too. Don't u speak to whoever looks after DS at night!

Original poster
minime87 · 19/09/2012 21:45

thankyou for all the lovely replies... Feeling much better (and less strange) now!
Oh, and I rope my mum in to staying over on the nights I'm at work (just realised my op kind of makes it sound like he has a quiet night in on his own!!!) So yes, I must talk to her in the mornings too- I guess that must not have registered as an 'adult' coversation... Sorry mum! [Grin]

OP posts:
QuangleWangleQuee · 19/09/2012 21:49

The OP said "I probally haven't spoken to another adult since saturday night at work." So maybe she works say Friday and Saturday night, so hasn't needed anyone in to look after her son since then?

QuangleWangleQuee · 19/09/2012 21:50

Cross posted!

Original poster
minime87 · 19/09/2012 21:56

And yes quangle , I do work fri and sat nights! :)

OP posts:
OnlyNiceSwearing · 19/09/2012 21:59

yanbu op, my youngest is 6 months and I couldn't possibly be parted from her!! We have so much fun. My lovely, well meaning mil said the other day about dd3 needing to get used to being apart from me and she would like to take her for a while. I am ebf and we are also in a really great routine, not strict but suits us down to the ground, we all get rest, naps and feeds fit in pefectly with school run, dd2 can't wait to see 'her baby' after school everyday Grin I don't need to be away from her! Mil is always welcome at our house whenever she likes so she can have her baby fix. I have spent a lovely week so far not really talking to any other adults, I am seeing friends at the weekend when the dc's are in bed but day times are spent with the baby, this time is soon gone!

JustSpiro · 19/09/2012 23:41

When my DD was tiny I worked 3 days a week and DH worked 4 day off/on shifts so sometimes my 4 days off would coincide with his working.

TBH I absolutely loved it. DD is 8 now - she is at school and both DH and I work term-time only and I really miss my 1-2-1 time with her. I can think of very little I wouldn't give for an afternoon snuggling on the sofa watching Peppa Pig (she was not impressed when I actually mentioned this to her earlier this evening Grin).

If you're both happy that's all that matters.

Noqontrol · 19/09/2012 23:45

If you're both happy then thats all that counts. Enjoy your time together.

MyBaby1day · 20/09/2012 04:38

YANBU, it's soooooo cute you love him this much and I am sure he adores you just the same OP Smile. It's very natural and I loved your post!!. x

exoticfruits · 20/09/2012 06:47

It is fine while he is a baby - you are all he needs- it just isn't good for him if you carry on like that when his needs change. 'It takes a village to raise a child' IMO and a parents job is the give them roots and give them wings. Just enjoy it for now.