AIBU to refuse to come into work on a scheduled day off?

[Hails86]

1st time poster so please be gentle....

I work Tuesdays and wednesdays and pay £55 per day to have my child in Nursery on those days. In november my work are implementing a new system and are telling me i have to come in on the Monday and i can have Wednesday off, no extra pay, however i cannot swap my childs nursery days which mean that week i will have to pay for him to attend nursery on monday, tuesday and wednesday that week but recieving only the same amount of pay that week as im still only working 2 days. Am i being unreasonable to refuse to go into work on the monday and tell them they will have to organise seperate training for me?

Thank you all for your replies, im off to bed now but didnt want be rude and leave without saying goodnight. A lot of you have given me some really good advice and suggestions and I am very grateful for this. Also Mrs Todd thank you for the flowers and your sympathies, it means a lot, even though i only mentioned in passing and aren't really that relevant to this aibu that you acknowledged them.

Sweet dreams all

Came on to suggest what Supersaint has already said- work all 3 days that week and "bank" the day.

i'm on the fence a bit with this one
i totally get that it's only one day, but equally i can imagine the full-timers' faces if they were asked to come in on a Saturday, even just as a one-off, which is the equivalent of what you're being asked to do.

i would definitely ask if you can bank the additional hours, as this might come in handy in the event of DC's illness.

Yes, banking the day is another option but to be used only when carer's leave allowance is used up. (assuming you are entitled to some carer's leave)

If a full time worker was told they had to attend a course on a Saturday or Sunday no one would think they should just accept it because they had two months to get used to it.

Gosh, I wish I knew what this job is! My experience is all employers ask you to do inconvenient training sometimes!

If you need to arrange child are for a.day thatbyou don't normally work, will your employer pay the extra cost?

I hear you about the "just find child care" as if you put it in a cupboard and forgot which one!
How about trying to use it to your advantage? Work the Mon, Tues and Wed of that week, and keep the additional day up your sleeve to have a day off when it suits you. I've come up against the same kind of problems working part time for over 10 years, and I now make it work to my advantage. Good luck

I've had this issue with issue with our nursery before, they won't let you swap days temporarily at all. I was lucky that I could call in help from family but I can confer to those doubters that formal childcare really can be that inflexible!

Can you ask for that day to be given as a day in lieu so you can use it when you need it? I think unfortunately you will have to suck up the cost (unless you tell your manager you absolutely cannot afford it so it's impossible to attend and see what they say...) but don't let them dictate when you get to take the day off you'll have accrued.

YABU.

my job involves having to go in on my days off for training every now and again. Training is important. And you've had plenty time to make arrangement.

OP you have my sympathy. I work Mon - Wed and my daughter is in a nursery those days. My DH works full time.

My boss is based in a different office from me. He told me today that he is going to have to put some meetings that we both need to attend at my office in my diary on thursday or friday (probably about once a month), not the days I normally work.

His reason is that his wife is going back to work after maternity leave and she will be working Monday to Wednesday and he will need to do at least the pick up or drop off at nursery for their child, so cannot travel to my office on those days.

So I am expected to magic child care out of thin air (no nearby relatives and absolutely no likelihood of swapping nursery days) on thursday or friday and work a day I dont get paid for once a month so that his childcare arrangements go smoothly.

Isn't there a law that if they've made a training course or meeting mandatory, they have to pay you for it?

I get paid for my training days.

Ah magic childcare - I'll hook out the potion

My nursery cannot do extra or different days, there are no other options for me if my one relative is unavailable or DH also at work. They can give me a lifetime of notice and I can't do chuff all about it.

You have had many good suggestions OP so I won't reiterate but wanted to give you a YANBU in support.

DO look at your contract of employment and check that they can actually do this - it may be covered, it may not.

Charlotte, I work full-time, normally weekdays but do have to work weekends sometimes. I don't get any extra money for this, just TOIL. In a couple of week's time, I have to work Friday through to Sunday at a conference. I'll get two days' TOIL, but no extra pay.

Oh, and call ACAS about being paid for the extra day - it's all very well of the employer just to tell you to swap but you may well be entitled to be paid for all three.

I totally get the dilemma. However, as this is a one off with work installing new systems I think it would be worthwhile trying to be flexible. Apart from anything else, it's in your own interests to make your employer see that part time working is viable. If they have to lay on individual training sessions for every worker who doesn't normally work on a specific day, then it'll cost them far more- and additional burden of costs to the employer is a perfectly legitimate reason for employers to reject flexible working. So I do think it's in your own long term interest to show that you are willing to be flexible. If they were expecting you to chop and change days every month, it would be different; but seriously, what are you expecting them to do? They are having a major new system installed and they need to train the workforce in a cost effective way. They aren't doing this just to piss you off.

With two months notice I would move heaven and earth to find alternative childcare, or see if the nursery might let you pay half for the weds you don't need (you never know if you dont ask) or see if your employer will contribute to the childcare cost. If all else fails, suck it up... It's £55 which in the grand scheme of things keeping your career going is not a big deal.

Would a childminder not be more flexible in situations like this?

I work part time hours now, but due to antisocial meeting times and Saturday work from time to time I get TOIL.

No extra pay - ever!! And if the training was held on a day I don't normally work, I'd just have to change it.

I do find my childminder works better than when we had a nursery arrangement.

I, too, think you have to get paid for your training days. That should sweeten the pill a bit.

if you have to do an extra day for training you should be paid for it.

A childminder may or may not be more flexible depending on how busy they are.

Op yanbu it's fucking annoying but sometimes you just gotta suck it up!

No, a childminder wouldn't be more flexible in situations like this.

Well some might, but most wouldn't.

It seems a little rich to be so pissed off about having your days of work messed about but expect to be able to pass the hassle on to your childcare provider.

I get paid nothing extra, ever, just toil.

My contract says they can reschedule my days worked and days off at 24 hours notice - they can extend or cut short my working day with no notice. I have the average working parents nightmare contract. I also have exceptionally limited childcare options. I really think it's hard for people to understand everyone's individual situation. We all do what we can and hope our employer is humane enough to be compassionate.

My dh has had this problem in the past. He does have two (used to be three) part time jobs and has had to explain to his work that he can't attend training on non contracted days. His mopst recent job he had them change the contract as he noticed it said he could be called in.

He is a teacher so can;t just book time off.

I have always refused to attend training days on non-work days, whether FT or PT, in a professional environment or a supermarket job. I have never been sacked for it.

My ONLY option for childcare is formal childcare, not enough CM's local to me, and the formal childcare here is not at all flexible either, due to being so oversubscribed. If, like me, you are a Lone Parent with no family back up, you just CAN'T be flexible like this.

And in the OP's situation - I wouldn't be able to either.

But then, I've never signed a work contract without getting my employer to remove any clauses that pertain to flexibility around work patterns or training days.

If you can't be flexible, you can't be flexible.

And as for the poster who is being expected to magic childcare arrangements on days off to fit in around her bosses childcare arrangements - SOD THAT. I would refuse. Not MY problem that him and his wife will have to arrange childcare. I am assuming it is one of the bosses usual work days, on Mon/Tue/Wed? If not, I can see the issue, if you never work even one day a week together, but if that's the case, why do the bosses childcare issues take precedence over the employee's childcare issues?!