to bribe my kids into being good.

[msnaughty]

Not sure if this will work or if its a good thing. my kids ague and bicker all day long and often deliberatly wind each other up. i was thinking each time they are kind to each other i write it in a litte book and if they have been kind enough times they get a treat.

or should it be that they have a treat to look forward from the start with but if they ague and bicker all week they don't get that threat at the end of the week.

or should it be that if they ague and bicker all the time they get punished for it. but im thinking if i can reward them for good behavour they might keep it up?

they are 10 and 5 years... any ideas would be great thanks :)

Really depends on you, with ds aged 6 I use stickers and sticker are traded for treats. He needs 10 for a magazine 20 for a computer game ect.

Personally, I think rewarding good behaviour is the way forward and much the most effective form of discipline. So don't promise a treat which can be taken away for bad behaviour; instead, make then aware of the possibility of a treat which can be earned for good behaviour. Make it easy to get - nothing big, but lots of pebbles, stickers, etc., which are measurable steps towards a decent reward. Never award these if they are not properly doing what they should be, but always award them if they are, even if they are behaving appallingly in other respects. Hopefully this will really help! Bribing children is definitely the helpful, as long as it is rewarding good behaviour and not bad - that is, don't offer them treats to stop arguing if they already are; give treats as rewards for not arguing in the first place. Good luck!

reward the good behaviour!
if you can keep it up, writing down when they are good will be a lovely record of how nice they are :) why not get them to write it down and you initial it? obviously the little one would need help...get some nice books/albums and let them stick photos of events in it too... oh, they could have a brilliant time doing this and you could be so happy with a record of how wonderful your children are!

I do a reverse star chart here, it pissed me off to high heaven rewarding basic niceties- so I now have a chart filled with stars (6 stars for each day) on a Sunday and if they've made it to Saturday with less than 7 stars being taken away they get pocket money. They know the family rules on manners and sharing, if they break them they lose a star. It does seem to be working for us but I'm sure someone here will tell me there's negative psychology in it!