To stop contact with this family?

[ShobGite]

DH is friends with a colleague of mine. We went there for dinner last night. He got a bit drunk (not massively) and was rather obnoxious. He called his DD (6) a bitch for knocking his drink over. His DW didn't say anything, I challenged him. Later on my DD (1) was blowing kisses to everyone but didn't to him. He swore at her ("oh fuck you then" or something like that). Who swears at babies? I let him know that I was very cross.

Thing is, our older DDs are friends, his wife is lovely, and DH really likes him. I'm inclined to let DH do what he pleases, but ensure that DDs don't spend time with him. Ideally, I'd like DH to speak to him about this, but he's not keen. WWYD?

You could ask him if he knows he turns into a prize bell end when drunk.

Wait and see what happens on Monday at work, he may well apologise. He certainly should!

Your DH can be friends with him, you can be friends with his wife, your older DDs can be friends with each other.

But I would not allow an adult like that to be around my children.

Your dd sounds like a great judge of character!

Someone who can call their dd a bitch when drunk should have made the decision not to drink ever again.

I'd have their dd to play but my child wouldn't be going near him.

Your husband is ok with your child being sworn at like that?

I wouldn't have anything more to do with someone who said that to my child. Drunk or not.

Alcohol doesn't change who you are. It simply lowers inhibitions. What you see when he is drunk is the core of him.

I wouldn't have my daughters spend time with someone that treats them like that either. Your dd can still see her friend and your dh can still see his friend, there is no reason why you have to all be together. It would be nice if you could, but if his behaviour means you can't, then so be it.

What did he say when you challenged him and let him know you were cross?

He laughed at me. The more I think about it the more enraged I am. DH not OK with it either, but not the type to rock the boat, IYSWIM. Not good enough in my opinion.

If it happens when he is drunk, they don't see him when drink is involved. You can be honest to him and his wife about your reasons why. Don't leave it up to your DH to explain - you could lightly say 'xx swears at my children when tipsy so no we (DH, you and the kids) aren't definitely going to your evening bash''