Lyrics That Are Wrong. AIBU?

[TiggyD]

Big Yellow Taxi - Joni Mitchel
"They took all the trees and put them in a tree museum.
And they charged all the people
A dollar and a half just to see 'em."

Is it just me, or does that sound like really good value for money? They have all the trees! A complete monopoly and they only charge a dollar and a half. Maybe they make the money back on the gift shop and food and drink but even if they charge National Trust prices I still think it'll be a bargain day out.

I think meatloaf was confusing love with sex

So he is saying that he will do anything for sex but it will only be with her

I find that Rita ora song a bit weird. She gets out of a bad relationship but goes back in because she's changed and is stronger. Doubt he's changed much though

Who remembers:

No no,
No no no no,
No no no no,
No no
There's no lyricis!

2 Unlimited

I thought it was there's no limits...

I knew that!

I think no lyrics is better though, more apt

Little children
You better not tell on me
I'm tellin' you
Little children
You better not tell what you see
And if you're good I'll give you candy and a quarter
If you're quiet like you oughta be
And keep a secret with me

It was a much more innocent time when you could write an opening verse like that and not be arrested before the second verse could indicate you are in fact telling your girlfriend's young sibling not to spy on you.

Has anyone even gone there with Alanis Morrisette's dubious grasp of the concept of irony??

No, Alanis, rain on your wedding day is not ironic, nor is having dozens of spoons when you require a knife.

Only just found this wondrous thread. All this time I've been working and could have been posting shite lyrics on Mumsnet .

I'm going to put in another vote for this thread to be in Classics.

Another shite lyric:
I said, excuse me you're a hell of a guy
I mean my, my, my, my you're like pelican fly

• Nicki Minaj.

The pelican fly bit is really irritating, it might mean something to someone but I have no idea and I cringe every time I hear it.

A pelican fly is a zip with a massive beak

Goodbye Hollywood Hills I'm gonna
Miss you whereever I go I'm gonna
Come back and walk these streets again
Goodbye Hollywood Hills forever.

So, you are not in fact going to come back and walk these streets again? Or you are not going forever? Which is it, man? Seriously, you contradicted yourself from one line to the next. Not even one verse to the next. One line. Flakey, much?

Urban Dictionary says it means extremely high on cocaine/amphetamines/LSD to the point of losing it. . I am so un-street!

Oh, and Lemar -
If there's any justice in this world
I would be your man, you would be my girl'

Fucking sort your tenses out, you drippy little boy!

Thank fuck I wasn't the only child thinking of ringing childline on Lisa Stansfield.

"Shake it like a polaroid picture." Flap it around erratically?

Can you blow my whistle baby
I'll show you how to do it and we'll start real slow
You just put your lips together and you come real close

Not sure who it is but just heard it on the radio! (I do like a song with whistling though)

If there is no innuendo I salute the guy for coming up with a song about such an innocent subject

On the (maybe incorrect) assumption that the one thing a desert is not used to is rain:
" and I miss you; like the deserts miss the rain"

Surely , more like it rains, and the desert says " now THAT'S something to write home about", not "blimey, been a bit dry lately, where's me old mate the rain?"

I'm not sure if I heard these lyrics right

I come from a land down under
Where women gurn and men chunder

Ha ha.totally agree with the 'you're so vain' one and the 'pina colada' one!

what about pink floyds 'We don't need NO education.' erm...yes you do mate.

and the lyrics of 'lady in red' eurgh. not just the lyrics but the way he sings 'darnce (dance)' then 'rhymes' it with 'romunce' (romance) and then 'given haaghf a chaaance'(half a chance). I mean, whats THATabout????

Glad I'm not the only one who's pissed off about the fact that Jools drives his girlfriend to an incubator to give birth. I mean, is she some kind of exotic snake that needs tropical conditions in which to reproduce?

There was this song that always came on, when I worked in Dorothy Perkins and the lyrics went,... 'Free to manipulate, when I stipulate, it's not my best day'
WTAF??!
One of the reasons that I left because this song was on loop for my whole shift.
I hate it when the rhyming is just there for the sake of it and doesn't make sense.

lovelygoldboots isn't the Joni Mitchell lyric "it's Love's illusions I recall" - meaning she was wrong about love in her last relationship?

I quite like the "...not even a chair" one. And I am loving "isn't it a bummer?" as a rewrite for " Ironic"

Raspberry Beret - wouldn't she look like a bit odd wearing a wool-based hat if it was warm?

I am Nicki Minaj, I mack them dudes up, back coupes up, and chuck the deuce up

DD has been playing that bloody song for months now, meaning I now know the lyrics, but, despite googling them for interpretation, am still none the wiser;

Joni was singing about love but comparing it to clouds and how they can look like stuff but are, basically, clouds and not 'ice cream castles in the air' - I love that song but since Love Actually I can't listen to it without crying for Emma Thompson

I was in Frankie & Benny's the other day and heard this - both my friend and I actually stopped gabbing, looked at each other and went WTAF? (again, by Frank Sinatra - did that man ever NOT sing a creepy, misogynist song?)

"Hey, little girl, comb your hair, fix your make-up, soon he will open the door,
Don't think because there's a ring on your finger, you needn't try any more.

For wives should always be lovers too,
Run to his arms the moment that he comes home to you.

I'm warning you,
Day after day, there are girls at the office and the men will always be men,
Don't stand him up, with your hair still in curlers, you may not see him again.

Wives should always be lovers too,
Run to his arms the moment he comes home to you.

He's almost here, hey, little girl, better wear something pretty,
Something you wear to go to the city,
Dim all the lights, pour the wine, start the music, time to get ready for love."

Hello, little school girl
Good mo'nin, little school girl
Can I go home with you?
Can I go home, later wit' you?
Now, you can tell yo' mother an' yo' father, um
That Sonny Boy's a little school boy, too

and.....

Now I got ten children of my own
I got another child on the way that makes eleven.
But I'm in constant heaven.
I know it's all right in my mind
'Cause I got a little schoolgirl and she's all mine
I can't get through to her 'cause it doesn't permit
But I'm gonna give her everything I've got to give.

great songs but.....

My mama told me, if I was goody, that she would buy me, a rubber dolly
My aunty told her, I kissed a soldier
Now she won't buy me a rubber dolly

My feeling is surely if you're old enough to be kissing soldiers, you won't be interested in a rubber dolly!?