to sometimes hate my kids

[ponytails]

ok well hate is a strong word but sometimes they really grate on me and i wish i could have my old life back
please tell me the crying and tantrums eventually stop and you can go out without it being a full scale operation
i actually want to go to work!

Oh yours are at a hard stage. I used to hate it sometimes. But it gets better and better. Seriously, if you feel very resentful of them/it, do get some help. They can't do anything about being children but you can do something about how you react to them (this is said with empathy, BTW)

Practical things:

Playgroup/nursery for the older one - at least a couple of half days
Share the care at the weekends if you have a partner/DH
Copious use of the DVD when necessary
Lower your standards of housework/cooking

I had the same age gap with my first two. its flipping hard work and sometimes they got on my nerves too lol. Its heaps easier now they are 3 & 5! hang in there op.
I am 36 weeks with my third eeekkk, will be me climbing up the walls again soon.

thanks guys - it was just exhaustion talking
cheered up when i took DS1 to bed and he gave me a huge hug and said 'wuv you to sky mum'

awww cute

I have a similar age gap between my two youngest and at that age I was in bits. I also felt like I hated them at times .

It's tiredness, it's frustration, it's just sheer lack of head-space that did my head in. I remember it well.

Mine are 2 and 4 now and although it's still tricky at times it's NOTHING like the early days.

Oh and I also have a (difficult) 15 year old and although teens are a challenge they are nothing compared to small ones. At least with them you get a break to gather yourself!

It will get better

NineCrimes You are very similar to me i also have 4dc aged 9, 4, 2 and 9 months. Some days are really very hard and I find myself longing for bed time. Does it get easier with 4 the older they get iye?

OP YANBU Life with young children to look after almost alone can be very draining but I don't think you would take your old life back even if offered it because even at the very worst moments it is always possible to look at your children and remember something they've said or done that can make you smile. I think saying you hate them or want your old life back is just a normal way of letting off steam.

Inneedofbrandy, if you ask me, you are only looking forward to the teenage years cos your children are not in them yet!

I think if you have little DC's a day doesn't go by when you don't get cross about something but, equally and far more importantly, a day doesn't go by when you don't laugh out loud and feel the lurv

Lolwhut

I agree. It's a lot of fun. But if you are feeling no fun/lurve, that's the time to get some help.

I felt quite tense a lot of the time when mine were little. It's the not-knowing when things will kick off/whether you'll be able to finish you meal/cup of tea/conversation/night's sleep.

Liquid, yes and no is the honest answer. In terms of them becoming more independent, yes it gets easier. A year or so ago I needed to get four ready for nursery etc, now it's just my younger two. The girls get themselves ready. They also help a fair bit with tidying up toys and doing other little jobs.

What becomes harder is trying to give them all some one to one attention based on their various needs which are all different. I wish I could split myself into four some days!

I think it's all about how much you expect of yourself. I used to be a lot more stressed because I wanted a spotless house, feed my kids nothing but home cooked food, spend every minute giving them attention. Finding the balance and lowering your tolerance levels helps a lot more than them simply growing older, ime.

flow I might have a slightly unrealistic expectations of shopping trips together, big family dinners, out to eat, helping dd get ready, being able to have movie nights with 18 certs, them being able to do bigger jobs like mowing the lawn ( I don't even have a garden ATM) and doing the smaller jobs properly. I might never need wash a dish again!

I've just realised I'm going to end up with a Kevin!

LOL inneedofbrandy having teens is pretty much on a par with having toddlers ;)

MsTerry Kill me now!

I know where you are coming from, I have 2 yo twins and a 5 yo and I'm not working at the moment, I find it really hard I've had two years of total care and I'm pretty spent. The twins are now starting at playgroup for 2 / 3 mornings a week and I'm hoping that it will give me some time to myself to get a career going again, do stuff for me etc Explore playgroups, I have a lovely one nearby and they love going. Its better all round plus it is preparing them for pre-school and then school.

I love them but at times I just want some peace.

I'm looking forward to them all being 18, is that bad?

Please don't spoil my dream!