To have just told my 12 year old son to rub out his art homework and start again??

[amck5700]

He has just started High School, loves Art and is loving school in general. He had an assignment that he has to draw an object from home each week and spend at least 30 minutes drawing it. This week is the first one and it was a plant or a flower paying particular attention to the petals, stems and/or leaves and to include shading.

He was called down from his computer to do his homework (he is supposed to check and do whatever homework he has before he goes on). He decided that 10 minutes drawing something from his imagination was enough. The picture wasn't actually too bad. However the plants in the pot he had made up didn't look real and therefore in no way had he followed the instructions and had essentially just rushed it to get back on the computer. I told him to rub it out, get a proper flower and draw it again spending 30 minutes.

He is in a grump and part of me thinks I should have let him hand it in and get whatever mark the teacher decided was appropriate.

YABU

he's in high school -homework is his responsibility and he needs to deal with the consequences of doing it half heartedly or wrong

Yeah, thouht so - I wont do it again - It is just that I know he really enjoys drawing so its not like it should have been a chore.

He has just gone and picked a couple of flowers from the garden and has started again.

YABU. He has to be responsible for his actions. I'd also ban computer time totally until homework was done though. Let him do it and hand it in

Yanbu. You care and he needs support in the right way.

......and he'll still have an hour to play on computer when he is finished.

YANBU, Still life is important in fine art. Learning to draw accurately from real life is a skill that takes practice. If you can't draw in a realistic style, then anything impressionistic you do will be shit. Also, he didn't actually do his homework. Good on you for making him do it!

He is very well behaved and bright and was in a primary school that had a lot of pupils with issues - I think that he has been allowed a lot of leeway with the quality of what he handed in in primary (which I allowed him to do what he thought was appropriate after P5) and therefore has set himself low standards for homework. The High School he is in is pretty academic so I think they will be less accommodating and I want him to get in good habits from the start.

Uanbu and I think you're showing him your high standards that you expect him to keep to.

I honestly wish there were more parents like you.

Thank you turkish - He is actually now happily drawing away - grump didn't last long!

Its tough really as he is my eldest so I am not sure exactly how much support/supervision i am supposed to be doing given that, as posters have said, he is now in High School so should be taking responsibility for his own efforts. It'll be a question for parents night I think!

I think this is the right approach when they've just started high school tbh. He's still in the cross over period from primary to secondary so you want to send the message that you're backing up the school just like you did before. You also want him to get off on the right foot/start with the right attitude. I don't think 'you're in high school now I don't care if you do your homework/flout the rules it's up to the teachers to sort out' is a good message to send!

YABU my mum used to do this (but funnily enough only with arty stuff) Nothing was ever good enough - "you can do better than that!" "oh, let me do it for you, you can't hand THAT in"

I have ZERO self esteem

I disagree with you batman - I think it would have actually been quite a good lesson for him to have handed the peice of work in and got a low mark for it. Its not about letting the teachers sorting it out, but about letting him take responsibility for himself.

2girls she didn't make him do it again because it wasn't good enough, she made him do it again because he hadn't done what he'd been asked to do. That's not the same.

thanks Holy

2girls - I didn't tell him the drawing wasn't any good, I told him it was actually pretty good given that he'd only spent 10 minutes on it but that it wasn't what he'd been asked to do. He was bullied in primary and we have spent a long time trying to rebuild his self esteem, I don't want to ruin that. He has now finished his drawing and I showed him in the booklet where the instructions were and the scoring criteria and said that I wont ask him next time to do it again as he has now been told what he needs to do and shown where to check for instructions. If he doesn't do that then that is his lookout. I said to him why I had asked him to rub it out and he says he is okay with it he was just annoyed. We'll see!

Ah, ok - i take back my YABU and replace it with an "i feel your pain" :)

Cunning i agree re the computer time. I don't however want him doing homework as soon as he walks in the door which my OH does. When we got back today it was sunny and light so I wanted him out for a bit and then we had dinner. He is however supposed to do any homework before putting the computer on. His defence was that it isn't due until Friday but according to his diary he also has French due on Friday - I said he should do at least one lot today in case he gets more tomorrow. OH said he should do both today and then of he doesn't get any more then he has a free night tomorrow but that it's his choice.

YABU.

Leave him to it he's not a baby.

YANBU, you are supporting the school by ensuring he is doing his homework properly. If you are still doing it when he's doing his A Levels that may be a step too far :)

lol 2 girls - just had a quick look at his books and he has some classwork that the teacher has written on " this is a very good paragraph with lots of description - however you have not read the instructions as there is no explanation" and in another book - "Read the instructions - you were to mark on the map in pencil not pen"

Sensing a bit of a theme here!!

lol headfirst we are in Scotland - we have Curriculum for Excellence to get through before he gets near any exams. I am still trying to understand exactly what he will be doing in 4/5/6 years time.

Leave him to it. With regards to homework in general, really should get done the day its given. It can very quickly pile up when you have several subjects all wanting it back on the same day, plus ongoing projects.

ihear - I have actually been reasonably impressed so far that he is remembering to write it in his diary while in the class - I am okay with his spacing it up to a point but as you say, you can space out what you have but that doesn't stop someone giving you more that is then due back at the same time. He also has activities on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday evenings so cuts down the time available.

I agree with doing it the same day it's given too. I was terrible for leaving my homework until the last minute, and always had tons to do. It stressed me out so much. I never learned either

I make mine do theirs straight away, then they can relax without it looming over them.