To take my chance at sticking to fingers up to boss?

[Hatemyboss]

I have been badly bullied at work by my manager and been off sick with work related stress after having a breakdown at work. I have raised a grievance and am speaking to a union. I really don't think it will ever get better. I have a friend in a senior position at another firm who knows how good I am at my job and that this is the first time I've ever been in this situation. She has a vacancy and pretty much said it's mine if I want it. AIBU to go back to work as soon as my certificate runs out and then hand my notice in, so I would be on full pay for my notice period instead of statutory? As o wouldn't be in same dept as my friend, would I need to tell them I've been off sick? Do my current employers need to tell them how many days off, when I had time off and the reason why? Sorry I know could put this in employment but really want as much help as possible xx

If you are so miserable in your current role, I'd say grab the offer of a new job with both hands, if you can pull it off. Even if you don't love it, you could always move on again (in a better frame of mind by then & generally feeling more positive)

Most companies will seek a reference from a current employer. I believe (but may be wrong) that they often do ask straight forward factual questions eg how long employed, current salary, how many sick days. They do this because wishy washy questions like "Was she any good?" lend themselves to (a) confusion about how to describe someone's performance (b) anxiety about saying "Not really" without being sued for being malicious or (c) exaggeration "Yes brilliant" in the hope of getting rid of someone.

If your friend is in a position to employ you, regardless of the reference, then what's to lose? Hope this is some help. Appreciate it's difficult if you fear that your current employers might give you a duff reference, so you lose the job offer, but they then make your life difficult cos they know you have no loyalty. But sounds like you are already unhappy, in which case they may be happy to help you move on (better for you, better for them). Maybe you could say to your current employers that you would be happy to abandon your grievance in exchange for a suitable reference which would enable you to move on?

It depends how long you have been signed off for, how long your notice period is & how long your friend can hold the job open for.

Given the way you've been treated, I don't think you owe your company any loyalty if handing your notice in later gets you more money. However, if handing it in whilst off sick means you don't need to go back in to work & confront your bully then that might be better for you.

Whatever you decide, don't hand your notice in until you've got a signed contract in your hand! Good luck!

Yes, be sure that your friend is completely in control of the recruitment process before saying anything to your current employer, or it could all go pear-shaped. I am relatively senior in my organisation but we are still expected to follow due process, and I wouldn't be able to just recruit a mate, no matter how good I thought they were at their job. But I guess it depends on the organisation and how hot they are on equal opps.

Hope you manage to sort things out.