to ask send my DS to the scabby nursery?

[Ecgwynn]

DS will be 11 months when I send him to nursery for 1/2 days a week. This week I've been viewing some. The first three I've seen have similar facilities for babies. They have rugs, books, toys, sensory rooms and mirrors and nice staff. they all had astroturf or that rubbery outdoor floor covering and big play equipment. The first three also had varying facilities for the older, pre school children but I've decided I should send him somewhere which is best for babies rather than concentrating on the pre school facilities just yet. They cost between 70 and 80 pounds per day.

The fourth one seemed much less well kept. The paintwork was scruffy, the carpet tiles looked cheap but there was real grass outside (one child seemed obsessed with bringing in inside!) and access to a big playing field beyond. They also have rugs and toys and books (but no sensory room!) The staff seemed less 'professional' in terms of relating to me as a customer but much better with the kids. The whole place was basically less middle class. This one costs about 50 pounds per day.

I want my son to grow up knowing that looking immaculate is not as important as how you treat people. I want to send him to the cheaper but friendlier place but then something inside me is saying 'No, he's your PFB, it's 30 quid cheaper there must be something wrong with it!'

There is also the question of if I sent him to the cheaper nursery, how I could improve his quality of life with potentially an extra 60 pounds per week.

Nobody told me parenting would be this complicated! AIBU?

So being working class means we're less professional at our jobs? What a big snob you are.

Go with your gut. I choose the more scruffy one, as the staff seemed a lot nicer and more into kids. It was the only one that insisted not to make an appointment too. Babies don't give a sausage for class!

After starting at a shiny nursery that closed after 12 months (because they wanted to raise prices by about 40% at a swoop and most parents would not wear it) I moved my DD to the nearby, slightly shabby nursery. Best thing I ever did - it was small, family-run with a tiny staff turnover. My DD had the same keyworker from the moment she started until she left, and when DD2 started she had the same keyworker the whole way through. The facilities were not pretty, but they had outdoor space, good healthy food, a warm loving atmosphere and a really good handle on behaviour.

Their OFSTEDs were always Good, never Outstanding, but it was always the facilities that stopped that from happening. Go with your gut - I did, and have never regretted it.

From experience. - its the friendliness and how caring the staff are that matters. I took dd1 to a preschool for a year in a village hall which was nothing much to look at and had a tiny back yard to play in. In all honesty, I probably wouldn't have chosen it but was the one my childminder could do at the time. However, I absolutely loved the pre-school, the staff were so caring and put so much thought into the activities they did with the children and dd came on in leaps and bounds. Whilst I was there it was awarded its first 'outstanding' ofsted which it thoroughly deserved.

Then last year I made the difficult decision to move dd to a preschool attached to the school I thought I wanted her to attend. The facilities were far more aesthetically pleasing, a lovely outdoor area and it clearly had more funding put into it. however, from the day dd started, I regretted my decision and it proved to me that it's the staff that are important and not the surroundings.

I was so unhappy there that my dd has started at a different school this week and dd2 will be going to preschool no. 1.

So my advice is go with your gut feel and don't think that more expensive necessarily means better

Go with your instinct. My dd just finished a fantastic year at a preschool in a dark & dingy hall. We looked round a couple of purpose built, shiney ones too but just liked the feel of the scuzzy one

My dd went to a really beautiful nursery that cost a fortune between the ages of 1 and 5. For the last year she's been at a much scruffier and cheaper nursery. She's isn't less happy or well-cared for in the current one and that is what matters.