to not like discussing our finances with friends?

[freddiefrog]

We've had some friends to stay since Friday - our kids don't go back to school until Thursday so we've had a long weekend together

All the time they've been here, 99% of their conversation has revolved around money - how much we earn, how much is our mortgage, how much is our car worth, how could we afford to buy our new sofa, how can i afford to shop in X/Y/Z etc, etc, etc

I hate talking about money.

They're obviously dying to know the ins and outs of our finances but I hate talking about it.

It's private as far as I am concerned but they seem to think I'm massively unreasonable for not wanting to discuss it with them

Maybe they aspire to have your live style and want to know how it can be done, so they can perhaps model it? I personally wouldn't mind it.

They sound rude. I dontllike discussing my finances but see no problem with asking the odd question about how much something cost. When we were looking at houses I asked my brother how much his new house cost. My SIL bought a secondhand car, it was a model I was looking at, so I asked her how much it cost.

I do think it's rude and intrusive to constantly ask how x and x and x and x cost. How much is your income, mortgage etc. Then make value judgements and ask how can you afford it.

I constantly "forget" what something cost. Very handy. And when people who I don't particularly want to discuss money with ask what I earn then "it varies".

Yes, asking people how they can afford X, Y & Z is very rude and BIL does this all the time. I told DP that next time he does it, I am going to speak my mind!

Oddly he has not done it since, so I think DP has had a word with DS about her husbands rude behaviour.

turn it round and ask them how much their coat/sofa cost instead.

Reminds me of the saying "House guests, like fish, start to smell after 3 days"

It's 'House guest are like fish, they start to go off after 3 days'

I don't mind telling friends where I got my sofa from but I don't tell them the ins and outs of our finances - that's completely private and between DP and I. I don't even talk to family about financial things.

I wouldn't tell anyoine how much our house cost either as from that they can make some educated guesses about our mortgage and from their our salaries and so on. All this is private.

I think it's extremely rude to ask about personal finances, especially when it's just being nosy or competitive about money. If the house, curtains, sofa, tv etc... are nice then what's the point in asking how much they cost unless you are specifically looking for something similar yourself and even then you should be polite about it.

They sound very boring tbh and that would annoy me more than nosiness or rudeness which can be dealt with, if 99% of their conversation revolves about how much everything costs that's all that's going on in their heads, if you get them to stop they won't have anything to say because there's nothing there.

Why are you friends with these people?

How terribly vulgar.

That may sound absurdly old-fashioned but is what I was brought up to think, or rather how to behave. It's a classic, along with sex and religion. All are only discussed if information is volunteered, never in a way that demands a specific response. Of course I'd volunteer some info on these topics to friends and we all have an idea of what each other earns but I'm still a bit shocked When people speculate about others' finances or ask direct questions.

They sound very materialistic. Do they have other values and interests? I think people who are interested in things are incredibly boring.

Interested ONLY in things.