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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

WIBU to home school the kids for a couple of weeks before they go to a new school?

64 replies

RosesAreBetter · 03/09/2012 12:04

I am hoping that we will be moving soon,
I have applied for a house (rented) in a different town and the kids would be going to a new school.
I am fairly certain that we will get this house, and would be able to move immediately, so hopefully it will only be a few weeks before we are moving.

The thing is that I hate the kids old/current primary school, I was hoping to have moved before now but things didn't work out with the last house that I wanted to rent.
I really don't want to send the kids back to that schoo for a few weeks, but I don't want to put them into the new school (and have to travel the 40 minute 2 bus journey twice a day) until I am certain that we have got the house.
But even if we don't get that one I will be applying for another one in another town, so the kids will not be going back to that school in the long run even if we don't get this house.

I am seriously considering just pulling them out now and saying that I am going to home school them until we move.

But is this a mistake? A waste of time? Will it make getting them into the new school more difficult?

The school starts on Wednesday and every part of me is certain that I don't want to send them back there.
I just don't know what to do or what will be for the best.

OP posts:

BlackberryIce · 03/09/2012 12:08

Er, you can't just 'pull them out'

Do you have the curriculum and associated tools/books etc all ready? You can't just 'home school' without planning!!

Have never heard anything so ridiculous

BlackberryIce · 03/09/2012 12:09

And your post is all I I I I .... What about your dc? Their dad? What have they all got to say?

ReallyTired · 03/09/2012 12:13

I can't see why you can't home educate for a few weeks. Home education is hard work, but is completely doable. BlackberryIce the OP has every legal right to home education and its not that ridicolous idea.

I would have thought that home education (Or even the threat to home educate!) would make a place come up at the new school very quickly. A 40 minute bus journey is not practical, especially as the OP would have to accompany her children.

SillySollySandy · 03/09/2012 12:14

Yes you can just pull them out. You just need to write to the school stating that you are withdrawing them to home educate.

Whether it is a good idea or not is another question. How
old are they? Why do you want to pull them out of the school? What will you do if you're move doesn't go through? Do you have any ideas for educating them in the interim period?

Noqontrol · 03/09/2012 12:14

Yes I probably would tbh. If you're situation allows it then do it.

Noqontrol · 03/09/2012 12:15

*your

SillySollySandy · 03/09/2012 12:15

your move

BlackberryIce · 03/09/2012 12:16

I know legally you can, but really??

SillySollySandy · 03/09/2012 12:21

Why not? It depends so much on the circumstances which the op hasn't given. If the children are in the middle of their GCSEs, it probably isn't a good idea. If they are KS1, it's not hard to do a little bit of reading every day, perhaps do a little project for a couple of weeks or blitz all the local museums and educational attractions.

MistyB · 03/09/2012 12:21

Post this in the Home Ed section and you will get more information about what you need to do, who you need to inform etc. You have every right to decide how and where your children are educated and it is your parental responsibility to do what you think is best for them.

As for whether it will make it getting in to the new school more difficult, you could speak to the prospective new head teacher and see what they think? Does the new school have places for your children?

Xayide · 03/09/2012 12:29

We'll have to move in next 18 months to 2 years to an area with limited school places so I'll probably have to home educated that end for a while.

If it ends up being just after September - I'd consider keeping them off and not sending back to the current school as I think not settling down again and then moving would be best.

However the downside to that would mean I'd have a lot less time and energy to sort things before the move.

How long a time would you have to do the the bus rides to new school ? Couple of weeks would be hard but possible couple of months not practical. Other wise I would consider home schooling for a bit.

PomBearWithAnOFRS · 03/09/2012 12:33

If you go to the Education Otherwise website, they have loads of info and resources that will help you decide. They even have a sample letter that includes the relevant "legal bit" for you to send to the school if you do decide to homeschool.
They also have forums where you can ask questions and get advice.
You can "just pull them out" of their current school, you can do it at any time, but you so have to make sure you obey the law too.

PomBearWithAnOFRS · 03/09/2012 12:34

also not so

StarlightMcKenzie · 03/09/2012 12:35

School ain't all that Blackberry, and the children won't come to any harm.

My Ds makes more progress in the school holidays than he ever does at school and I don't even teach him anything purposefully.

Original poster

RosesAreBetter · 03/09/2012 12:45

Thanks for the replies.

My children are 5 (going into year 1) and 6 (going into year 2).

The reason I hate the old school is that DS was bullied for pretty much the entire of last year by one particular boy, he was physically assaulted many times, had his propery (coat, PE kit, school sweatshirt and shoes) stolen, had work intentionally vandalised, all by this boy.
I would regularly get called (at least once or twice a week) saying that DS has a tummyache/headache/earache and could I come and get him, as soon as I would get there he would sob and tell me what the boy had done to him.
For the entire year the school did nothing, I had weekly meeting with his teacher and the head, some of which I would have to stand in reception until she came out of her office as she HT would refuse to see me 'again'.
They continuously said they were 'dealing' with the situation but they did nothing.
When DS was punched in the face and given a bloody nose in the middle of the class room the teacher said she didn't see it and that there was no proof that they boy did it. This was a very regular line. Nobody ever saw anything.
The boy made DS's life hell, and the school did nothing.
And it was all because this boys mother is a part time TA at the school.

I tried everything, I wrote to the head, to the goveners to the council, I asked for DS to be moved classes but nothing happened.
I was branded as being an annoyance and they claimed DS was 'just a clumsy boy' who liked to blame other people for his accidents.

That's why I don't want to have to send my kids back to that school.

I posted this here for genuine advice and opinions.
And I would be happy to hear any suggestions.

Blackberry, I am doing this for my kids, we have to move because the house we live in is in bad condition and my landlord is awful to the point of illegal, and I want them to go to a good school where they can be happy and safe.

OP posts:

Xayide · 03/09/2012 12:50

The Primary school section has many people frequently there who are very good with school admission polices - it might be an issue for you depending on your area as both your DC would be in KS1 which has the 30 DC max size rules.

I have to say I wouldn't want to send my DC into the situation you are describing.

WelshMaenad · 03/09/2012 12:50

YANBU, you CAN 'just pull them out' and I second the recommendation to have a look at the home ed section here and the Education Otherwise website.

I am so sorry for what your DS has been through, that is appalling and I think you need to escalate to the board of governors, regardless of whether your sons will be returning to that school

lljkk · 03/09/2012 12:50

I have related question, not sure it's answered here.
Next summer we might move to a town that has all over-subscribed local schools. I have 4 dC: 1 in infants, one in junior, 2 high school age.

If we move in August 2013, I don't think I can sign DC up to attend that town schools until we live in the area, so I expect none of DC would get into any local school (within the town, within walking distance). I think they would be offered places at village schools for primary places, and other town high schools 9+ miles away. And go on waiting list for the schools actually in the town, within walking distance.

I don't want DC to settle at other schools, or to have to pay for 4 sets of uniform that might be used only for a few months.

QUESTION IS:
Could I home-ed instead AND have DC stay on waiting lists for the local schools in the town? My guess is NO; that if they are deregistered that they will not be allowed to have names down on any school waiting list. Or do you think it will be down to individual LEA policy about whether HE children can go on their lists?

I will phone LEA in week or 2, but not sure they give reliable answers. Or they will couch answers in so many caveats my head will be spinning & none the wiser.

Xayide · 03/09/2012 12:54

I don't know lljkk- I was assuming I could home educate till I got places at same or nearby schools for all three DC - as no family and no car would make anything else impossible.

I was going to talk to the LEA and ask questions on education boards - in my case primary much nearer the time.

SillySollySandy · 03/09/2012 12:59

What a horrible situation for your DS to be in . I don't think I would leave my DCs in that situation if I had any choice in the matter.

If you do decide to pull them out though, I really think you need to consider what you will do if your move falls through or you can't get your DCs into acceptable schools in the new area. Are you in a position to be able (and willing!) to home ed in the longer term if you have to? Or you might find that they thrive and don't want to go back .

akaemmafrost · 03/09/2012 13:04

What are you on about blackberryice? Of course she can pull them out. What do you think would happen if OP did this? Would it ruin their chances for Oxford or something? 2 weeks out of school?

I don't think a couple of weeks will make much difference OP. How old are they? Found out what they're are up at present then do a load of activities and Internet research based round it. If like you say it's only for a couple of weeks, there will be no issue.

akaemmafrost · 03/09/2012 13:05

Oh and given your most recent post my dc would not be returning to that school.

5madthings · 03/09/2012 13:06

yes you can have them on a waiting list whilst you home educate. we did exactly that and it wasnt a problem at all!

i dont think there is any 'rule' that says children need to be at one school so they can go on a waiting list for anothet school.

my children got places in yr2 and yr5 at primary having previously been home educated.

akaemmafrost · 03/09/2012 13:08

Same as 5madthings we pulled dd out of her school for various issues and she was registered immediately, the same day we pulled her out, with LEA and got the school of our choice for the following term.

5madthings · 03/09/2012 13:10

and rose it is perfectlt legal and fine to keep your kids out of school until you move and they start a new one. you have very good reasons for doing so and at their age it will be relatively easy ime to do any work you need to at home, at their age i wouldnt do anything majorly structured but there are plenty of resources available online if you want to :)

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