To have told SIL not to come?

[Softlysoftly]

DH invited his DB and DSIS and their partners to dinner tonight. Nothing massively formal as DCs still up but first time we have had them all over since the weddings (both married recently).

Anyway DSIL (DBILs wife) just texted to say she had a stinky cold and she didn't want to infect the kids. DH said call her back and say we don't care still come.

Normally I'm not precious about avoiding infections but DD1 gets viral wheezes with colds and ends up on inhalors and DD2 is just 12 weeks and we go on holiday Saturday. I cba to spend our holiday with sick kids which I know might happen anyway but if I can avoid it I will.

So anyway I agreed with DsIL that she should steer clear just this once, explained why, she was fine but now DH thinks I'm being really mean and should have said to come over.

AIBU?

YANBU, and SIL probably didnt want to come if she feels lousy with a cold anyway!

She sounds really thoughtful and as squeaky siad, probably wants to just stay at home.

On the other hand you're probably just as likely to catch it from her DH or from some random old biddy in the supermarket - you just never know do you? But I'm sure she'd prefer to be in bed - who wouldn't? Don't pressure her to come - she won't enjoy it

Tell your DH that when someone says "I don't want to infect your kids" what they are really saying is "I'm ill and I'd rather not come along. But I'm not really that ill that I can't come, so I'll pretend it's about me being caring and not about me wanting to get into jimjams by 6pm." It was also probably for your DBIL's benefit because he can see that she's not so ill that she couldn't make it, but he can hardly argue with his wife just being thoughtful for his DB's kids.

YANBU. I think your SIL is very thoughtful, maybe send some dessert home with her OH!

Agree totally with don't mind if I do. Your SIL was much happier lying on the sofa, sucking halls soothes and watching trashy telly.